Have you heard the statements (or maybe you’ve even said the statements), “You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours” or “Marriage is a 50/50 proposition where each partner should be willing to come half the way to compromise and make things work?”
While those statements SOUND good, they really aren’t principles you can always count on to make your marriage work. If you have a marriage that functions well on these principles, then you’re one of the rare ones —because eventually, something comes along in life to mess up the equation. And then what do you do? Is this really the biblical principles the Bible talks about?
Throughout the Bible we’re told to “go the extra mile,” “serve one another,” “die to self,” and “submit to one another” … We are to “do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” So when you put the above principles up against what it says in God’s Word, you can see that there’s no 50/50 equation involved.
In a perfect world it would work that way, but we don’t live in a perfect world on this side of heaven; we live in a fallen world where unfairness is a part of everyday living so God asks more of us than that.
To consider this further, we’d like to share a portion of a Familylife.com article, written by Dennis Rainey titled, “Super Glue Your Marriage.” Here’s part of what Dennis wrote about why the 50/50 plan fails: (more…)
If you hope to survive parenthood with your marriage intact you must become unified in all you do —lock arms (and hearts) and stand firm together!
Being unified means understanding that this is not a one-person show.
The strength of your union will show in the day-to-day application of the plan you agree on. No matter how much the two of you agree to make your parenting and discipline decisions together, there will be times where one of you is put in a position of having to make an on-the-spot decision.
Although your basic, agreed-upon guidelines will help in making that decision, that is no guarantee that you will end up choosing what your spouse would have chosen. Disagreements are bound to occur. How you handle these situations will tell both you and your children just how united the two of you really are.
The following are some suggestions to help couples to keep up a united front: (more…)
- Cindy Wright – July 22, 2014
Is it important to know if you are compatible sexually before marriage?
I can well understand why couples might wonder because they’re trying to make sure they’re compatible in other ways before marrying, which can be good. But when it comes to opening the gift of marital sexuality before making a marriage vow of commitment to each other, it’s another thing entirely.
The following is something I wrote to a person who asked how it’s possible to know if they are sexually compatible or mismatched before marrying. As they pointed out, it’s difficult to know this if they can’t have sex before marriage.
Here’s a portion what I wrote to this person (and afterward, I’ll give additional links to even more information): (more…)