Marriage Missions International

I Love You But I’m Not IN LOVE With You Anymore

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OUCH!!! If you’ve heard the words “I love you but I’m not IN love with you anymore” said to you by your spouse, again I say …OUCH to the Nth degree! Even if you’ve said those words to your spouse, I say OUCH! There is a lot of pain that comes about as those feelings are revealed.

That phrase of, “I love you, but I’m not in love with you” is being said and lived out by marriage partners here, there, and everywhere we turn, it seems. It’s like a deadly plague in epidemic proportions, that is infecting and killing marriages all over the world. We call it the “in and out of love” sickness, because that’s what it is.

I have to confess that this same insidious sickness invaded our marriage as well. A number of years ago, I felt the same way about my husband, Steve. I was tired of what was going on in our marriage and just wasn’t experiencing the same romantic feelings I once had for him so I concluded that I wasn’t “in love” with him anymore and that this “love” would never return. I wanted out!

These feelings, or lack there-of, almost brought about the death of our marriage relationship. Thankfully, God intervened to open my eyes and then to help resurrect a new love —a true love within my heart and mind for my husband. We now have a great marriage (with on-going work) and a deep, deep love for each other.

And since that time of our “lost love”, I’ve learned a few things that I’d like to pass along to you. Hopefully, it will help someone in some way. Whether you’re the one who has heard those words said to you by your spouse or you’re the one who is experiencing that “lost love” in your heart, I pray you will be able to benefit from what I’ve lived, learned, and want to pass along to you.

Through what I’ve experienced and have learned it has been revealed to me that:

We can say the words “I love you” but that doesn’t mean that we understand what is involved in truly loving someone. Words can be cheap. Love is lived out by our words AND our actions. We can get a type of high from the experience and when that “high” leaves us, we’re ready to slink away and jump into the next emotional high of what “love” brings our way.

And in the wake of our jumping from one LOVE to the next, a lot of people —especially children, are left behind devastated. Somehow, we need to change this and reach for mature and growing love.

“‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you’ is a cop out. It basically means that I have no clue how to make a relationship last LONG-TERM so I’m exiting to get high from another short-term romance. But whoever they’re IN LOVE with now will also eventually hear, ‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you.’” (Mort Ferel, in the Christian Post article, “I Love You But I’m Not in Love With You“)

Love is more than feelings. Feelings can deceive you. One minute you feel one way and the next you don’t. You may THINK you love, but actually what you could be experiencing is temporary infatuation, “lust” or a bio-chemical rush that lasts for a season that is unsustainable in the long-run without following through with decisions to help it to grow.

A great article to explain this phenomenon is posted on the Todayschristianwoman.com web site. If you’d like to find out more about it please click onto the link below to read:

WE’VE GOT CHEMISTRY

I didn’t realize this when I first fell in “love” and eventually married Steve. I can now see as I look back that my “love” for him was probably based more on a bio-chemical attraction than anything else.. I can totally relate to something that relationship expert Pat Love, explained about this type of “love”. She wrote:

“‘Love at first sight’ can happen, but most often infatuation begins with fondness or comfort in each other’s presence. Later there comes a flush or a quickened heartbeat upon encounter, or maybe a heightened energy when you are together. As the infatuation continues, separation from your love creates a great deal of anxiety. When not together, you daydream about reunion and anxiously anticipate the next encounter. To comfort yourself, you might replay former encounters in your mind, sleep with a shirt left behind, listen to a song that reminds you of him or her, or listen to an old message on your answering machine. As the relationship takes on special meaning, you long for further contact and spend time and energy scheming about ways to get together.

“…When the lover’s affection is confirmed, daily priorities get reordered. The workaholic misses deadlines. The penny-pincher blows a paycheck on plane fare. Sleep is sacrificed for [times together]. Long phone conversations and/or e-mails abound. Both people have a remarkable ability to emphasize what is admirable in the other partner. They may even feel compassion for negative traits to the extent of turning them into positives (‘He is so honest, he told me all about his affairs’).

“The brain is an incredible creation; it begins working long before your birth and doesn’t stop until you fall in love.” (Pat Love, from the book, “The Truth About Love”)

Can you relate? I sure can! Not only can I relate to the fluttery feelings that infatuation brings, because I sure experienced that with my husband Steve for a long time, but I can also relate to the brain stopping —both during the infatuation stage as well as later as I lived out my own definition of love.

After the infatuation stage passed, I think my love for my husband evolved into something that was based more on how he made me feel. As long as he made me feel good about myself and our relationship, I was “in love” with him. But when the everydayness of marriage and circumstantial storms invaded our lives and many conflicts between us arose out of it all (plus, the fact that Steve and I were very young and immature), my “love” seemed to disappear.

As authors Dr Les and Leslie Parrott wrote in their book I Love You More:

“Without love there would be no wedding, and certainly no marriage. Love is the catalyst for commitment. Love is what insures that every marriage starts out good. But sooner or later every good marriage bumps into negative things. And that’s what honest couples discover —that love, no matter how good, is never enough.”

And it sure wasn’t enough for us —at least not the type of love we had for each other, based mostly on feelings. I may have loved Steve in my own way, but it wasn’t the sustainable love that would hold our relationship together when problems clouded over our feelings.

It was at that critical fork in the road in our marriage that God revealed to me that:

Love is both a noun and a verb. In other words, “love” names and states your feelings (as a noun), but it is also something that demands action (as a verb) to help it to be and stay real.

Yes, I did many things for Steve (and complained about many of them when it seemed too one-sided), but I didn’t get the concept that my feelings wouldn’t always be pronounced or even evident at times, which would make me want to continue doing things for him.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 is one of the many places in the Bible where we can see that God points this out to us. Every “love is” that is mentions in those Bible passages, such as “patient“, “kind“, “does not envy“, “is not rude” etc, puts a verb to it. That doesn’t mean that love is ONLY about actions, but it’s a very important part of it. We sometimes forget that.

“While someone who says, ‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you’ seems to be making a distinction between ‘different loves;’ in fact, they are expressing their confusion about what love really is. And that’s why they’re having marital problems and maybe even an affair (because who are they IN LOVE with?).

“Love is something we articulate in the vocabulary of ACTION. Love is a verb. It’s not a feeling you get from another PERSON; it’s an experience you receive as a result of DEEDS YOU DO for another person. And those deeds are not a secret. In other words, love is NOT a mystery! There are specific things you can do with your spouse to solve your problems and build love in your marriage. (Mort Fertel, in the Christian Post article, “I Love You But I’m Not in Love With You“)

God taught me that I had to put feet to my faith and feet to my love for my husband. Love is both a noun and a verb. I learned that sometimes, even though the feelings of love were not there, I still needed to be loving in my actions and eventually the feelings would come along for the ride. What I did for Steve, I did “as unto the Lord” and trusted Him for the result. I needed to exercise mature love —the type that Jesus showed us while we were yet sinners” as He died for us on the cross.

“Most people think that the FEELING of love comes BEFORE we express love  —and in the beginning of a relationship, that’s what happens. You fall in love and THEN you do acts of love. Your feelings inspire your actions.

“But mature love asks more of you. To create a strong LASTING marriage, you first CHOOSE LOVING ACTIONS. Your feelings will follow. After all, you don’t jog two miles or skip dessert because you feel healthy. You feel healthy because you jogged two miles and skipped dessert. So too, when it comes to your marriage, YOUR ACTIONS CREATE YOUR FEELINGS!” (From the article “Change the Momentum of Your Marriage” by Mort Fertel)

I’ve learned that you can learn to love the same person all over again with intentionality and God’s help. I really didn’t think my love would come back for Steve. It’s something God had to work on in my heart and I had to trust Him for —all a part of the faith-walk we are on this side of heaven. I’ve talked to many others who have found themselves in the same place with their spouses and they thought the same thing. But I did what I needed to do, and they did as well, and our marriages got back onto the right track as a result.

It doesn’t happen this way for everyone, but I’ve seen that it happens more than we could imagine as we trust God to help us to live as we should, no matter what we see going on at the time.

For me, it was a journey that God took me on to first learn what real love was all about and to learn more about God, whose very name means LOVE. If He couldn’t teach me how to love and be one who is more lovable, who could? I got into the Bible and learned more about God’s ways, learned more about my husband, worked on my own issues and became intentional in living out the principles of love I was learning even before I had the feelings I desired. It was a difficult journey but one worth taking.

I can relate to what author Nancie Carmichael wrote:

“Marriage can be better than ever, if we will do what Jesus says. We can be very complicated when it comes to restoring love. We wait for ‘feelings.’ But we don’t need to wait for the feelings of love —we can “do” love. Jesus says that we are to do what He says. What does it mean to ‘do’ what He says?

“It means to be kind to one another. It means we will lay down our lives for each other —which could mean truly listening to one another. It means we speak the truth in love to each other and treat each other as we want to be treated. These are not dramatic, new ideas. But love never fails. It bears fruit. The amazing thing about Jesus is that feelings follow actions.” (Nancie Carmichael, from the Christian Mommies web site, in an article you can read further and learn more by clicking onto “Fall in Love With Your Spouse Again“)

Again, something that marriage expert, Mort Fertel says applies as well:

“Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It’s a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable —you can ‘make’ love (from the article “I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You“).

I realize by saying all of this, that I may be “preaching to the choir” —that you may be “doing” and “making” love until you’re ready to fall apart with no end in sight. And you may be exhausted barely hanging on.

I have to say that I don’t know the journey you are on in all of this. And I truly am sorry for your pain. It may be that you need to keep “doing” and keep asking God to show you how to endure going on without seeing an end in sight. I’ve seen this happen before. I’ve actually been there before in other prayer areas of my life.

I’m reminded of Noah and Abraham and Joseph and Job, from the Bible who probably saw no end in sight in answer to their situations despite all they had to keep doing all along their journey. But eventually they did see a positive answer to their toils and their prayers.

I think of missionaries who will go years and years without a single convert and then eventually, because they kept going on and didn’t give up (even though they were discouraged more times than they could count), they saw a glimmer of hope. And hope was renewed and prayers were answered.

I’m also reminded of the many gold miners in the United States, years ago, who gave up JUST before they would have struck gold, and history records how close they came to victory, but someone else received the benefit of their labor instead. They gave up JUST before the going got good.

I can’t tell you if that is the journey you are on or not. I know that it tells us in the Bible “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9).

And I can tell you that Jesus said, “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden light” (Matthew 11:28-30).

It also says in the Bible that “those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint” (Isaiah 40:31).

I can’t tell you that the “rest” or the renewed “strength” you will receive, or the “harvest” will come in the way that you expect, because God ways can’t be boxed in and predicted like that. But just as Elijah found out, God is there for us, even in a whisper (see 1 Kings 19) or a completely different way.

When we trust him and “lean not upon our own understanding” as we’re told in Proverbs 3:5-6, He will make our “paths straight” for the journey we are on. HE will “not leave us or forsake us” (see Deuteronomy 31:6 and Hebrews 13:5), even if others might do so.

He might be quiet for a while for whatever purpose He may have, but you can be assured that He loves you and is closer than you think.

This article cannot give you all the answers. I don’t have them. I’ve learned a lot through the years about love and marriage and not giving up and persevering beyond the strength I thought I had.

Some of you may have to live out tougher love than you ever thought you would or could. How I wish I could change that for you. I know the type of pain that involves and it’s worse than one can often describe. If you believe this might be the case for you, the following Crosswalk.com article may help you better understand this concept:

• ASK DR DAVID: True Love Requires Tough Love

And then for a different twist, some ideas to pray about from an article that isn’t written from a Christian perspective (and isn’t posted on a Christian web site), but it gives you serious food for thought and something to pray about and consider when your spouse says, “I don’t love you.” Please click onto the link below to read:

THOSE AREN’T FIGHTING WORDS, DEAR

Again, we can’t give you all of the answers within this article. But in my research, I’ve learned a few additional things from other marriage educators and authors that I’d like to pass along to you. It may be the reason you are to read this article, to gain a clearer understanding of your situation and then eventually the Lord will reveal more to help you in the future.

When a person says “I love you but I’m not IN love with you,” not only is it emotionally traumatizing for the person on the receiving end of those words, but it’s also confusing. “Where did their LOVE run off to?” And “how can I make sense of all of this?” And “what do I do about the love I feel for my spouse now that he/she says ‘I don’t love you?’” can be a few of the many, many questions that come up.

The spouse who is delivering this horrible message to the other spouse is actually wrestling with other issues:

“The excuse ‘I’m not in love with you anymore’ is nonsensical. Let me tell you why. There is no such emotional condition as falling out of love; it’s a justification for doing whatever you are planning on doing. It’s a way to let your spouse down easy.

“What you’re really feeling and should be saying is ‘I don’t want to love you anymore.’ It usually means that the attitude towards your spouse and marriage is not what it once was. Perhaps you are talking yourself into having an affair or perhaps you have already had an affair.

“The person who says ‘I’m not in love with you anymore’ is searching for a feeling. The marriage has stopped giving them a feeling they want and expect to have.’” (Angie Lewis from the Beyondprose.com article titled “I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You Anymore —which you may want to read to learn more on this issue.)

As I said before, feelings can come and go.

“A person who says, ‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you,’ is making a distinction between 2 different feelings. But NEITHER of those feelings are love! When a person says, ‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you,’ they’re saying that I CARE about you but I’m not EXCITED about you.

“CARING about someone is a good thing. It’s reflective of CONCERN. But it’s different than love. I care about the starving children in Africa, but I don’t love them. Being EXCITED about someone is a good thing. But it’s different than love. I might be excited to have a relationship with President of the United States or a Hollywood star, but that doesn’t mean I love them. (Mort Fertel, in the Christian Post article, “I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You” (You can also receive Successful Marriage Tips via the email, on his web site.)

Again, there is a difference in feelings and the label we can put upon the term “love” but true love is more than having feelings for a person. There is more required to truly live out a “life of love” as we’re told in Ephesians 5:1-2, Be imitators of God, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”

IF your spouse will listen to reason, and will put effort into making your marriage work once again, the following article written by Brett Williams, posted on the AMFM web site, gives a few pointers that may help:

I LOVE YOU BUT I’M NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU

And lastly, the following Youtube clip is excerpted from the sermon “Friend with Benefits,” part 2 of Mars Hill Church’s Real Marriage sermon series. It was preached by Pastor Mark at Mars Hill Downtown Bellevue. It’s titled, “People Don’t Fall Out of Love”

Here’s a portion of what Pastor Mark said, to prayerfully consider:

“People may fall out of repentance, but they don’t fall out of love. God tells us we can love our enemies. How? Because love doesn’t begin with or emanate from us —God is love. Even when we’re not feeling particularly friendly toward our spouse, we can still love them with the love that God gives.”

After all that is brought out in this article, and in the linked article, and the Youtube clip, how I/we wish new and true love could be infused into your spouse’s heart for you, and/or love can develop instantly in your heart for your spouse! Unfortunately, learning to love again and anew, takes more than hopes and wishes. It takes intentionality to learn what God can and will teach to those who are willing to participate.

Although Steve and I can’t do much more for you than what we offer in this article and on this web site, what we can do is point you to the One who can renew your hope. We encourage you to believe that this is not the end of the world for you. The Lord can bind up your broken heart and bring healing and help in ways you may not be able to imagine at this time.

In closing, I would like to share something with you that is written in Stormie Omartian’s book, Praying Through the Deeper Issues of Marriage (that we recommend you read). It is a prayer, based on scripture, which I believe God could use to help you in your situation. It’s titled “Prayer for Breakthrough in Me.” You may want to use it as an outline to pray through, for God to minister to your heart.

You can’t MAKE your spouse participate in your marriage in the way he or she should, but you can ask God to keep your heart and mind and focus centered on doing things His way, and to give you peace of mind in the process. Here’s the prayer:

“LORD I COME BEFORE YOU and cast all my cares at Your feet, knowing that You care for me (1 Peter 5:7). I thank You that Your plans for me are for a good future filled with peace and hope (Jeremiah 29:11). Help me to remember that no matter what is happening in my life and in my marriage, You will never leave me or forsake me.

“Lord, I confess as sin any time I have felt hopeless about my situation and especially about important aspects of my marriage. Your Word says that ‘hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when desire comes, it is a tree of life’ (Proverbs 13:12). When time passes for so long and I see no change, I feel heartsick and hopeless. But I confess any hopelessness I have to You, for You have said that whatever doesn’t come from faith is sin (Romans 14:23). It reveals that my faith in Your power to change things is weak. I pray that You would help me to not hesitate to hope again out of fear that I will be disappointed. I commit to trusting in You at all times. I pour out my heart before You, knowing You are my God of refuge (Psalm 62:8).

“Help me to become a child —entirely dependent upon You, for I know that this is the safest place I can be. I pray that You would search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my anxieties; and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting’ (Psalm 139:23-24). Enable me to become all I need to be.

“In the midst of challenges in my marriage I say, ‘Be merciful to me! For my soul trusts in You; and in the shadow of Your wings I will make my refuge, until these calamities have passed by’ (Psalm 57:1).

“Even though we may suffer at times in this marriage because of things one of us has done or not done, I know that You are ‘able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us’ (Ephesians 3:20-21). I will be strong and take heart because my hope is in You (Psalm 31:24).

“Thank You that You put my tears in Your bottle (Psalm 56:8). I pray that You, Holy Spirit, would give me ‘beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, and the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness’ (Isaiah 61:1-3). Make me to be a pillar of righteousness for Your glory. Help me to not cease my ‘work of faith, labor of love, and patience of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ’ for I know You can change everything in my life (1 Thessalonians 1:3). In Jesus’ name I pray.”

The above article is written by Cindy Wright of Marriage Missions International.

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Comments

146 Responses to “I Love You But I’m Not IN LOVE With You Anymore”
  1. Joseph from United States says:

    When two people marry it’s for Life. They pledge their love, affection, both emotional and spiritual to the other person. God sees all things. That is why if one person is unfaithful the other senses it. And when the unfaithful one realizes the other person knows that they have been unfaithful their guilt is multiplied 100 fold. They must make amends with God first and the spouse second.

  2. Eloise from South Africa says:

    Thank you. This has helped me a lot. And has helped me to find some peace and hope

  3. Christie from United States says:

    This is great! I actually go to Mark Driscoll’s church! I love his teachings and I loved this article you wrote. I actually just wrote an article on this topic. I would love if you checked it out. http://beautythroughashes.com/transparency/i-dont-feel-in-love-anymore/ I love my husband even though I may not always feel it. I had about 5000 views and people admitted that they felt that way too.

    • Cindy Wright from United States says:

      LOVE your article, Christie. Thanks for sharing it with us. I’m hoping it will inspire more people to persevere through the “drought” times in marital love, to work towards the better and best of times. I know… my husband and I had to do this and now we are madly in love with each other. I love your analogy of parental love because you’re right… there was a time (more than once) that I didn’t like or think I loved them, but that sure changed later in life. I’m reminded of James 1:4 where we’re told, “Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

  4. Kiki from United States says:

    There IS a difference between being IN love and loving someone. I love my parents and kids and I would die for them -but I am not IN love with them. Being In love means that there’s some special ROMANTIC bond that makes people want to be together. Sometimes the things that brought people together that way die over time because ppl change and if they don’t make an effort to maintain a certain level of romance in their relationship -that bond dies. NO woman or man wants to spend the rest of their life with a roommate they don’t desire or have much in common with anymore.

    • Doug from United States says:

      It’s a choice. Make the correct choice.

    • Larry from United States says:

      It’s not as simple as making a choice. The other person in the marriage has to make the same choice. All marriage advice always comes with the spin of fixing what we’re doing wrong. Well, sometimes, we can do everything right and the other person refuses to love you back. And as time goes on, you do get weary and it becomes impossible to have romantic feelings for someone who makes you miserable.

      I’m in this boat myself. I love my wife dearly. I try to correct the problems with my own character. Although both Christians, we were different people when we married. She has become ultra-conservative in her convictions, almost cult-like, in my opinion, and has tried to ram her new convictions those down my throat. And then, from time to time, she comes off with the whole, “I love you, but not in that way” nonsense.

      I have to remind myself of Jesus undying love. But there is a limit, even with God’s love, because when not received, it ends with His judgment and wrath. I’m so depressed at times because I feel biblically trapped in a marriage I don’t want, and the only help I find is the “how to fix me” stuff. I honestly pray that God would return for us, or have her leave me, because I don’t want to sin to try to find relief from misery. Isn’t it sad to live a life this way?

      But please don’t lecture about choices. Some of us have made those choices that have never been reciprocated.

      • Doug from United States says:

        I made the choice to stand and am close to having her divorce finalized. She has not acted as a wife for years and yes, it is hard to bear. I’ve fallen and I’ve gotten back up. My choice. My teenage daughters have benefitted from my stand. God bless you.

  5. Allison from South Africa says:

    Thanks Cindy for the LOVELY sermon. I have been in conflict with my emotions of lately because my ex partner and I were together for 4 years and it has been hard to go and meet other people. Though we were never married, I can identify with everything you said. God brings people in our lives that treat us better than we ever thought possible and when that happens we love it. But as soon as we see them making mistakes we forget that they too are human and we stop working on our relationships.

    There is a lesson here. True love is what God sends but it is up to us to keep it true. I blamed my ex boyfriend for being the reason why we broke up. What I didn’t realize was that he too was bound to make a mistakes as he is human, and it is my duty also to realize that as I had once believed he was a God-sent Angel, I needed to believe in God to pull us through no matter how many times we found ourselves in a slump because that’s what we used to say.

    I felt like I didn’t love him but after reading this I also realize I made my mistake and he never left me. What I get you are saying is, we should work on us, our partners and relationships because these days it is hard to find good relationships, let alone a wonderful one and I had a wonderful one. I also learned that we should respect our bodies and that has been one thing that has prevented me from moving on because for 4 years I was intimate with one man and I had planned to have it stay that way.

    There are people out there who are sick, angry and ready to spread the sickness and claim lives. I could be on my way to being the next victim, knowing on the other hand, I had blessings and took them for granted. I might just meet one of them and end up sick myself and again blame God. God sent me an amazing man but I bailed out on him and our promises that I made to him and God. Thank you very much. I will be calling my ex and definitely work things out with him and find God again.

    • Jennifer from United States says:

      Reading what you wrote was highly inspirational- your words made me want to fix my own marriage even more. Reading of your decision to call your mate and repair what you had mistakenly almost given away gave me great hope and caused me to feel joyful! I pray that the two of you are successful in healing your love. I hope your partner receives your love and open arms with the same in return… How I pray that is the outcome of your decision to reconcile. I hope you get married in the end. By reading your words, it is quite evident that you are a special woman, a good woman. Please let us know of the outcome. I would very much like to speak to you woman to woman. I would love very much to have a friend who has faith as you do. You are in my prayers.

      • Jennifer from United States says:

        I also want to add that if your partner is not at first willing to reconcile… do not despair or give up. It may take him a while to move past his hurt… but you’re meant to be together and I pray you stay the course through all odds and obstacles.

  6. Sherryl from United States says:

    An impressive share! I have just forwarded this onto a co-worker who was doing a little research on this. And he actually ordered me dinner because I found it for him…
    lol. So let me reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanx
    for spending time to talk about this issue here on your blog.

  7. Don from United States says:

    Please say a prayer for me! My wife has told me that she is not in love with me anymore! I think she is seeing someone else and giving him a lot of her money! I feel so helpless as she keeps her cell phone away from me and is always angry with me even when I’m nice to her! After 23 years she is like another person! Please give me strength, God! I’ve always been a faithful husband and treated her great but I hurt my back and was laid up for a while and she got lonely. I’m in a lot of emotional pain right now! Please, I need all the prayers to help me get through this!

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