The Power Of A Praying Wife

I Don’t Even Like Him—How Can I Pray for Him?

praying wife Dollar PhotoHave you ever been so mad at your husband that the last thing you wanted to do was pray for him? So have I. It’s hard to pray for someone when you’re angry or he’s hurt you.

But that’s exactly what God wants us to do. If He asks us to pray for our enemies, how much more should we be praying for the person with whom we have become one and are supposed to love? But how do we get past the unforgiveness and critical attitude?

Honest with God

The first thing to do is be completely honest with God. In order to break down the walls in our hearts and smash the barriers that stop communication, we have to be totally up front with the Lord about our feelings. We don’t have to “pretty it up” for Him. He already knows the truth. He just wants to see if we’re willing to admit it and confess it as disobedience to His ways. If so, He then has a heart with which He can work.

Power of Praying Wife

If you’re angry at your husband, tell God. Don’t let it become a cancer that grows with each passing day. Don’t say, “I’m going to live my life and let him live his.” There’s a price to pay when we act entirely independently of one another. “Neither is man independent of woman, nor woman independent of man, in the Lord” (1 Corinthians 11:11).

Instead say:

“Lord, nothing in me wants to pray for this man. I confess my anger, hurt, unforgiveness, disappointment, resentment, and hardness of heart toward him. Forgive me and create in me a clean heart and right spirit before You. Give me a new, positive, joyful, loving, forgiving attitude toward him. Where he has erred, reveal it to him and convict his heart about it. Lead him through the paths of repentance and deliverance. Help me not to hold myself apart from him emotionally, mentally, or physically because of unforgiveness. Where either of us needs to ask forgiveness of the other, help us to do so.

If there is something I’m not seeing that’s adding to this problem, reveal it to me and help me to understand it. Remove any wedge of confusion that has created misunderstanding or miscommunication. Where there is behavior that needs to change in either of us, I pray You would enable that change to happen. As much as I want to hang on to my anger toward him because I feel it’s justified, I want to do what You want. I release all those feelings to You. Give me a renewed sense of love for him and words to heal this situation.”

A Challenge

If you feel you’re able, try this little experiment and see what happens. Pray for your husband every day for a month using each one of the 30 areas of prayer I’ve included in this book. Pray a chapter a day. Ask God to pour out His blessings on him and fill you both with His love. See if your heart doesn’t soften toward him. Notice if his attitude toward you doesn’t change as well. Observe whether your relationship isn’t running more smoothly.

If you have trouble making that kind of prayer commitment, think of it from the Lord’s perspective. Seeing your husband through God’s eyes—not just as your husband, but as God’s child, a son whom the Lord loves —can be a great revelation. If someone called and asked you to pray for his or her son, you would do it, wouldn’t you? Well, God is asking.

There is a time for everything, as it says in the Bible. That’s never more true than in marriage, especially when it comes to the words we say. There is a time to speak and a time not to speak, and happy is the man whose wife can discern between the two.

Pray Rather Than Say

Anyone who has been married for any length of time realizes that there are things that are better left unsaid. A wife has the ability to hurt her husband more deeply than anyone else can, and he can do the same to her. No matter how much apology, the words cannot be erased. They can only be forgiven and that’s not always easy. Sometimes anything we say will only hinder the flow of what God wants to do, so it’s best to, well, shut up and pray.

This is an excerpt from, The Power of a Praying® Wife, written by Stormie Omartian, published by Harvest House. This is one of my (Cindy’s) favorite books! As Stormie said, “I can think of no better way to truly love your husband than by lifting him up in prayer on a consistent basis. It is a priceless gift that helps him experience God’s blessings and grace.” With real-life illustrations, Stormie includes sample prayers, and scriptures that inspire and encourage —to help wives rest assured in God’s promises of restoration, renewal, and growth in marriage.


Below are linked articles to read to guide you to pray for your husband in different ways than you might have otherwise thought:

10 Things Praying for Your Husband Does for You (the Wife)

30 Days of Praying for Your Husband


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Filed under: For Married Women Spiritual Matters

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624 responses to “The Power Of A Praying Wife

  1. I am desperate! Please, please, please pray for my family! I love my husband with all my heart. Today I found out he wrote one of my friends & I saw that an ex girlfriend wrote him. He choked me, threw me down, & poured water on me. I did say what is wrong with you & that he was sick & told him he doesn’t have any loyalty & never loved me. I also cursed in there too. I’ve caught him talking to so many girls over the last 11 years. Not to mention the emotional & mental abuse too. He also has a porn addiction & was addicted to nerve pills.

    I’ve recently found my way back to the Lord & I feel like devil has just been attacking me. I know God doesn’t like divorce & I don’t want a divorce. I just want my husband to stop lying & cheating & destroying my heart. I’ve tried to understand why he is the way he is. He never admits when he gets caught & always calls me stupid & crazy. I know I am making him sound awful but he’s really not; he does have a good heart & he believes in Jesus but has never truly repented & changed. I just want a normal happy life & I honestly don’t know if it’s possible with him because he never stops. After I catch him he’ll be wonderful for a few days, maybe weeks sometimes but then right back to the same things. I desperately want my marriage to work.

    I love him unconditionally even after everything he’s done to me. I know I’ve been a doormat but that’s just who I am. I forgive so easy because I want him but not the ugly mean him. I honestly think he has a borderline personality disorder because it seems he can’t stop. I don’t even like going anywhere with him because of the way he looks & how he acts around women. It’s like he forgets I’m even there. His own wife. I take marriage very seriously & want to please God more than anything. Do you think God wants me to stay with him? Should I get divorced? I need help & desperately want him to be saved. I know in my heart he’ll never stop unless God helps him. Please, please, pray for me & for his salvation. Him being saved is so important to me even if our marriage doesn’t last. Please pray for us.

    1. First,I want to say God bless you; second, you are never a doormat. We as women tend to love our men so hard, and it is so real. We make all kinds of excuses for our behaviors, because we love them so much and our marriage is everything to us. But listen, you can’t change him, only you. And ask God to lead and he will show you what to do. Stay strong, we as women are very strong. Good luck!

      1. Thank you so much for replying! Yes I have finally figured out I can’t change him. I really appreciate you saying I am not a doormat. I guess I just feel like it sometimes. I will definitely take your advice.I am gonna pray about it & try as hard as I can to give it to God. Thank you my dear friend. Your response means so much. God bless you too :)

    2. I believe God will help. It seems as if we going through the same stuff but God says I should trust in Him. I know He never fails. It is a bit difficult walking in this trust practically, believe me. If God be God then He will arrest them and turn them over to righteousness. We just need to ask Him to help us not to give up on them and His timing as God. It is well and will always be well with the righteous.

  2. We aren’t married yet.. 03/26/2017.. Hopefully. But I still the need to pray for him as my husband. Am I jumping the gun? It’s been almost 10 years.

  3. I have found this page such a good encouragement to us wives who are goibg through such difficult times in our marriage. I take this oportunity to ask prayer for my marriage. I and my husband have not been seperated for so long. I am a servant of the Lord tested in this situation; I am standing with God’s promises and confessed to God that whatever situation I am into,I won’t give up serving Him. Please pray for the restoration of my marriage, healing and deliverance. Forgiveness on my part…thank you so much.

  4. My desire is to see my husband have an intimate relationship with Christ. This year alone has been a very tough year. We have only been married for 5 years. He is not abusive mentally and I truly feel like he does not mean to make me feel rejected or unwanted but he does. He has no problem looking into my eyes and telling me a lie one minute and he loves me the next as if he thinks those words take the pain away; it doesn’t and I know it will only be through Christ that I will truly learn to trust him. I know in my heart God can touch the heart of my husband.

    Sometimes I think I desire this romantic, loving, no matter what we go through we will get through it with God’s grace and with honor and integrity. I look around and wonder if that’s possible for me. Is that wrong? I pray that my husband will be the man God has designed him to be. I also pray that he will bring out his gifts that he has placed in my husband, he is the masterpiece of my husband. I also know in his defense I do not always respect him although he has done a lot for me not to I am wrong for not be obedient in that area. I am going to pray for you. And I pray that you will stand in with me and help me pray. I don’t want to slam my husband or anyone’s. My desire is to see our husband’s raised up where they are bound and released and see God raise them up and use them for his Glory and Honor. That they will walk in his favor and be a true reflection of God…Please pray that I will be the wife God has designed me to be and my husband to be what God has designed him to be.