SCRIPTURES and Quotes to Help You in Marriage

love-699480_640The following are scriptures and quotes that we believe you’ll find helpful for living by the Bible in your marriage:

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. (1 John 4:7-8)

• Love flows through a marriage that lives up to mutual responsibility. “Love is not self seeking, it’s not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrong.” (1 Corinthians 13:5 )

• Foundation Verses for Marriage: “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” (Hebrews 10:24) Ask yourself: “How can I spur him on to encourage him?”

• Don’t isolate yourself, “Let us encourage one another —and all the more as you see the day approaching” (Hebrews 10:25).

• A true demonstration of love: “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for each other.” (1 John 3:16)

• Apply Hebrews 10:24 that says, “As far as it be within you be at peace with all men.”

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21)

• It says in 1 Corinthians 13:7 that love “always protects.” That doesn’t mean love enables, covers over, or makes secret those things that should be brought to the light. (Giving “protecting love” is being very careful and prayerful of when, where, and with whom, we share “personal” details of our married life that need extra help and wise counsel.) To truly love our spouse is to protect them by showing honor and respect for their feelings —not revealing or doing anything that will embarrass or “cut them down.” By doing so, we’re dishonoring them and showing that we don’t value them.

It also tells us in 1 Corinthians 13 that “love is kind,” “does not delight in evil,” and “is not self-seeking” so by embarrassing them, we dishonor not only our spouse, but in many ways, we also show the Lord that we dishonor His Word. Even if our spouse dishonors us, we aren’t given the permission to retaliate in return. (Cindy Wright)

• Keep in mind as you weather those marital storms, that we’re warned in 1 Corinthians 7:27-28, that “those who marry will face many troubles in this life.”

• In reading Luke 19:41-44, I see how these verses could also apply to the enormous sadness that Christ must feel as He sees the “war” that rages within marriages today. It says in these verses, “As Jesus approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it and said, ‘If you, even you, had only known on this day what would bring you peace —but it’s hidden from your eyes. The days will come upon you when your enemies will build an embankment against you and encircle you and hem you in on every side. They will dash you to the ground, you and the children within your walls. They will not leave one stone on another, because you didn’t recognize the time of God’s coming to you.”

If we could only “know” the peace that He can bring into everyday living and into our married lives as we allow God to teach us how to truly love one another as Christ loves the church. The “enemies” that are described within these verses could also be compared to the things that we allow to come between us as a couple so we’re no longer living in loving covenant with our spouses. Not only will we be brought down —but also, and most tragically —so will our children.

As Oswald Chambers once said, “If I allow any turning away from God in my private life, everyone around me suffers.” All of this is because we don’t recognize Christ’s redemptive ministry, open to all that embrace Him as Savior, AND as Lord, in being the foundation upon which our marriages must be built upon and maintained. It’s enough to make all of heaven weep! (Cindy Wright)

• The apostle Paul said, “In all things, I have learned to be content.” That same statement can be applied to marriage. In 1 Corinthians, we see how Paul addressed many difficult relationship questions. The over-all answer that he seems to give is to “Be content in the situation where God has placed you. If you’re married, don’t seek to be single. If you’re single, don’t seek to be married.

Live God’s way, one day at a time, and he will show you what to do. Both marriage and singleness are gifts from God. One isn’t morally better than the other, and both are valuable to accomplishing God’s purposes. It’s important for us, therefore, to accept our present situation.” (Explanation from “The New Life Application Bible” of 1 Corinthians 7:3-11)

• In Ephesians 4:15 Paul challenged Christians to live a life of “speaking the truth in love.” Our tendency is to do well on 50% of that verse. Some of us have mastered “speaking the truth.” We’re quick to point out anything that we see or perceive in our spouse and are willing to use any method (attacking, judging, etc.) to drive the point home. Others of us are stuck at the “in love” part of confrontation. We’ve come to believe in complete acceptance and tolerance of any behavior.

Often we become paralyzed with a fear of hurting someone’s feelings and withdraw into passivity and silence. Speaking the truth in love combines both of these concepts to allow us to confront sinful behavior without compromise, yet with absolute care and respect for the individual, saying things in a way that the person can accept. When a couple takes the stance of living out Paul’s challenge of “speaking the truth in love” to each other, the old models of judging and passivity must disappear. (Jeff and Lora Helton)

He who finds a wife finds what is good. (Proverbs 18:22)

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. (Proverbs 12:18)

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control. (Proverbs 29:11)

Finishing is better than starting! (Ecclesiastes 7:8)

• The principles for living in the Bible are the principles for loving in our marriages. (Cindy Wright)

• Don’t give in to injustice —be a difference maker. Give to your spouse, the grace that you would want from him and that you want the Lord to give you. Keep in mind these words, “He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” (Micah 6:8)

And also the words written in Isaiah 1:17,“Stop doing wrong, learn to do right!” 1 John 3:16 says, “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.”

I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. (1 Corinthians 11:3) “Submission is a key element in the smooth functioning of any business, government, or family. God ordained submission in certain relationships to prevent chaos. It’s essential to understand that submission is not surrender, withdrawal, or apathy. It doesn’t mean inferiority, because God created all people in his image and because all have equal value. Submission is mutual commitment and cooperation.

“Thus God calls for submission among equals. He didn’t make the man superior; he made a way for the man and woman to work together. Jesus Christ, although equal with God the Father, submitted to him to carry out the plan for salvation. Likewise, although equal to man under God, the wife should submit to her husband for the sake of their marriage and family. Submission between equals is submission by choice, not by force. We serve God in these relationships by willingly submitting to others in our church, to our spouses, and to our government leaders.” (Commentary from the New Life Application Bible)

Guard yourself in your spirit, and don’t break faith. (Malachi 2:16)

• Man was not “created for woman, but woman for man.” For this reason, and because of the angels, the woman ought to have a sign of authority on her head. In the LORD, however, woman came from man, so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God. (1 Corinthians 11:9-11)

“God created lines of authority in order for his created world to function smoothly. Although there must be lines of superiority. God created men and women with unique and complementary characteristics. One sex is not better than the other. We must not let the issue of authority and submission become a wedge to destroy oneness in marriage. Instead, we should use our unique gifts to strengthen our marriages and to glorify God.”(Commentary from the New Life Application Bible)

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any blemish, but holy and blameless.

In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church —for we are members of His body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery —but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:25-33)

“Paul devotes twice as many words to telling husbands to love their wives as to telling wives to submit to their husbands. How should a man love his wife? (1) He should be willing to sacrifice everything for her. (2) He should make her well-being of primary importance. (3) He should care for her as he cares for his own body. No wife needs to fear submitting to a man who treats her in this way. (Commentary explanation from the New Life Application Bible for Ephesians 5:25-30)

“The union of husband and wife merges two persons in such a way that little can affect one without also affecting the other. Oneness in marriage doesn’t mean losing your personality in the personality of the other. Instead, it means caring for your spouse as you care for yourself, learning to anticipate his or her needs, helping the other person become all he or she can be. The creation story tells of God’s plan that husband and wife should be one (Genesis 2:24), and Jesus also referred to this plan (Matthew 19:4-6). (Commentary explanation for Ephesians 5:31-33)

• A very important principle for men to take to heart: “Speaking the truth in love we will in all things grow up into Him who is the head, that is, Christ. From Him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work” (Ephesians 4:15-16)

• When you’re living in a “coping situation” in your marriage, you need to make sure that you put activities and “helps” into your life that will enable you to build up your energy back up. Living in a “coping situation” can drastically drain you emotionally, physically and spiritually. Therefore, if you deplete your reserve energy without restoring at least part of it back from time to time, you’ll find yourself in a crisis situation eventually.

The Bible tells us that we can “do all things through Him who strengthens us” (Philippians 4:13). But we have to make sure that we don’t neglect to plug into the source of energy so we can do all things.

• Let me ask you, “Are you prayerfully and carefully treating your spouse with the love, honor and respect that God would have you? Are you showing the love of Christ to your spouse?” If not, you may want to pray Psalm 51 with a sincere heart and ask the Lord to show you how to love, honor, and cherish your spouse as you promised in your wedding vows.

• “Fight truth decay —study the Bible daily.”

• Make a pact with a friend of the same sex regarding purity and sexual fidelity to your spouse. Agree to share and ask questions regarding the details of relationships with members of the opposite sex apart from your spouse. Memorize a verse to recall in times of challenge. (Alistair Begg) Recommendation: 1 Corinthians 10:13: “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”

NEW TESTAMENT MANDATE —a review of some of the “one another” verses:

• Be devoted and give preference to one another. (Romans 12:10)
Accept one another. (Romans 15:7)
Care for one another. (1 Corinthians 12:25)
Carry each other’s burdens. (Galatians 6:2)
Forgive one another. (Ephesians 4:32)
Encourage, build up one another. (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
Spur one another on to love and good deeds. (Hebrews 10:24)
Confess your sins to one another. (James 5:16)
Pray for one another. (James 5:16)

• We’re Christ’s representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God’s work of making things right between them.” (2 Corinthians 5:20 -The Message)

• Watch what God does, and then you do it, like children who learn proper behavior from their parents. Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that. (Ephesians 5:1-2, The Message)

• Beware of these statements, “He is” -or- “she is” -or- “I am” a very private person.” PRIVACY CAN VERY EASILY LEAD TO BEHAVIOR THAT GIVES INTO DARKNESS. (See: Proverbs 4:19, 2 Samuel 22:29; Psalm 112:4; Matthew 6:23; Luke 11:34-36; John 3:19-21; Romans 1:21; 2 Corinthians 4:6; 2 Corinthians 6:14; Ephesians 4:17-18 and Ephesians 5:8-14; 1 Peter 2:9; 1 John 1:5-7; 1 John 2:9-11). Privacy can easily lead into secrecy. And secrecy leads to all kinds of trouble because it’s not exposed to “the light.”

Being a “very private person” can be especially dangerous in a marriage. When we give the vow to enter into a marital relationship, we give up the right to our privacy —especially when that privacy can have a negative effect the life of our spouse. Be careful of the statement, “what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him” because often it will. Follow the Lord’s leading in this issue. Keep in mind that in marriage, God wants to take the “two of us and make us one.” The enemy of our faith wants to take the “oneness of us” and make us into two.

“The killer of love is creeping separateness. It’s taking love for granted, especially after marriage. It’s ceasing to do things together —finding separate interests. It’s ‘we’ turning into ‘I.’ The modern world, especially in the cities favors it with the man going off to his office; and the woman staying home with the children —or perhaps having a different job. The failure of love might seem to be caused by hate or boredom or unfaithfulness with a lover; but those were results. First came the creeping separateness: the failure behind the failure.” (Sheldon Vanauken and Cindy Wright)

• As you read Matthew 5:31-32 you can see that “Jesus is trying to move us from easy divorce to a deeper commitment to marriage.” (Dr. Roger Barrier)

An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. (Proverbs 24:26)

• Make it a priority to be involved with other couples on a regular basis, in order to support and be accountable to one another in your marriage relationships. Church small groups and Sunday schools are ideal. Hebrews 10:24-25 says, “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another and all the more as you see the day approaching.” (Alistair Begg)

• The surprising result of being honest about your fears and insecurities is that people may actually be more drawn to you (Dr. Todd Linaman) “The wisdom of the prudent is to understand his way, but the folly of fools is deceit.” (Proverbs 14:8)

• Say what you mean, mean what you say, but don’t say it mean. “But speaking the truth in love, may [we] grow up in all things into Him who is the head —CHRIST.” (Ephesians 4:15 NKJ)

• The enemy of our faith tries to divide us because he knows that “united we stand, divided we fall.” He fans the flames of rivalry and pride. How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!” (Psalm 133:1)

• What are you feeding in your marriage? Are you making a conscientious effort to feed your love, and commitment to your spouse, or are you feeding your doubts, dissatisfaction and self-absorption? If you don’t make a point of feeding your love and commitment, then it’s easy for doubts and dissatisfaction to slide into your way of perceiving your spouse without even realizing it.

Life today naturally pulls us away from each other. The hectic busyness of the way we’re living takes its toll on the marital relationship because without making the time to nurture our love for one another, unmet relational needs have a way of negatively ambushing our feelings of love for one another. Do you spend your time focusing on the negative or on the positive aspects of your spouse?

The Bible tells us in Philippians 4:8-9: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable —if anything is excellent or praiseworthy —think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me —put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” (Cindy Wright)

• My prayer for marriages: “May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.”(John 17:23) This is also an example of how God wants us to function. Just as God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit are separate individuals within the Godhead, yet they are one in purpose. In marriage the husband and wife are different individuals and yet they are to be one in purpose. (Cindy Wright)

Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and mutual edification. (Romans 14:19)

• Prayer for marriages: “May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.” (John 17:23) This is also an example of how God wants us to function. Just as God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit are separate individuals within the Godhead, yet they are one in purpose. In marriage the husband and wife are different individuals and yet they are to be one in purpose. (Cindy Wright)

• Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes (author unknown). “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.” (Proverbs 29:11)

Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. (Romans 14:19)

Under three things the earth trembles, under four it cannot bear up: a servant who becomes king, a fool who is full of food, an unloved woman who is married, and a maidservant who displaces her mistress. (Proverbs 30:21-23)

If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven —if there was anything to forgive —I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes. (2 Corinthians 2:10-11)

The lips of the righteous knows what is fitting, but the mouth of the wicked only what is perverse. (Proverbs 10:32)

• Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs. (Proverbs 10:12)

• Jesus said, “I came that they might have life and have it to the full” (John 10:10). When applying this message to marriage, it’s not that those who don’t have a personal relationship with Christ can’t have a good marriage —they can —we’ve seen this to be true. (It’s rare but it’s possible.) But to have a full, rich, abundant married life together, Christ is the key. Marriage is all about the love of God displayed through ordinary people. (Cindy Wright)

• “There are two hindrances to good communication that must be overcome. There’s the bad habit of lazy listening and hasty speaking” (John Lavendar). (Goes with James 1:19)

Let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance. (Proverbs 1:5)

The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice. (Proverbs 12:15)

The discerning heart seeks knowledge, but the mouth of a fool feeds on folly. (Proverbs 15:14)

He who listens to a life-giving rebuke will be at home among the wise. (Proverbs 15:31)

He who answers before listening —that is his folly and his shame. (Proverbs 18:13)

The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge; the ears of the wise seek it out. (Proverbs 18:15)

Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. (Proverbs 19:20)

Apply your heart to instruction and your ears to words of knowledge. (Proverbs 23:12)

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.(James 1:19)

• A quiet and gentle spirit disarms men. (Dr Charles Swindoll)This is in reference to the scripture that says, “Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.” It should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight” (1 Peter 3:1-2 and 1 Peter 3:4).

A wise man’s heart guides his mouth, and his lips promote instruction (Proverbs 16:23).

The lips of the righteous know what is fitting, but the mouth of the wicked only what is perverse (Proverbs 10:29).

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. (Proverbs 12:18)

A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered. (Proverbs 17:27)

A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions.(Proverbs 18:2)

Speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is that Head, that is, Christ. (Ephesians 4:15)

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.(Philippians 4:29)

Put away perversity from your mouth keep corrupt talk far from your lips. (Proverbs 4:24)

He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.(Proverbs 13:3)

My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All of the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse. (Proverbs 8:7-8)

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. (Proverbs 18:21)

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control. (Proverbs 29:11)

Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. (1 Corinthians 13:5)

If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. (Galatians 5:15)

In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. (1 Peter 2:11)

Remind the people to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men. (Titus 3:2)

• Think of your marriage as sacred ground. It’s a union God has sanctioned, not just because you were determined to come together but also for God’s purpose. “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” (Matthew 19:6)

Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so? (Amos 3:3)

• The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 5:2, “Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few.”

Serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Galatians 5:13-14)

Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others (1 Corinthians 10:24).

Everything is permissible —but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible —but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others (1 Corinthians 10:23-24).

If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other (Galatians 6:15).

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers (Galatians 6:9-10).

But wisdom is proved right by her actions (Matthew 11:19).

But I tell you that men will have to give account on the Day of Judgment; for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned (Matthew 12:37).

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this —that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command (John 15:12-14).

• Love is an act of will, both an intention and an action. “Let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth” (1 John 3:18).

If you have additional scriptures and/or tips you can share to help others who are married, or if you want to share requests for prayer and/or ask others for advice, please “Join the Discussion” by adding your comments below.


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170 responses to “SCRIPTURES and Quotes to Help You in Marriage

  1. (UNITED STATES)  I’m sitting here at my computer and I’m so depressed because my husband has been seeing this woman for 9 years. I have caught him at her place so many times, and each time he said that it’s over. But when I look at his cell phone log, he texts and call her all day long.

    I know that I made promise to God for better or worse. That’s the only reason why I keep trying to fight for our marriage. My husband is keeping up her house better than his home. I don’t know what to do. My husband doesn’t care who sees his car in her driveway. She has been seen driving our vehicles and has been seen in the cars.

    I’m so tired, I know GOD knows my pain and the loneiness. My faith in God is the ony thing keep standing firmly in word. Can anybody tell when is its okay to walk away from your vows, because I am so unhappy?

    I try to talk to my husband and he tries to make me seem like I’m insecure for no reason. I used to love my husband but my love is slowly fading. I’m so graceful these scriptures they will get me thru some difficult days and nights. Thanks!!

    1. Sandra I see it’s been years since you made your post and I still wanted to comment because I know your pain and I don’t want to go into details about my marriage but I pray God has worked it out for you or is working on it!! Your husband or ex-husband doesn’t deserve to have you if he’s putting you through that! You should be happy though because God is blessing those problems out of your life and his mistress will suffer harder than you will ever because she knew about the marriage and still made the decision to come in between a married couple. Pray for them !

  2. (USA)  I want to thank you for making sites like this. I love my God but I have a hard time with trust, love and some other hang ups. I started to go to church almost 2 years ago. I attend a Celebrate Recovery Group at my church. That is how my following God started. I have come a long way in my young life. People are amazed how I am so young and have such a love for God in such a short time. They feel I would be great at helping others who need to be guided in the right way.

  3. (U.S.A)  Hi, I’m 26 about to be 27. I got married way too young. I have three amazing children from that marriage. My ex husband cheated on me from the get go but I was raised with old ways. One day he left. I knew where he was going and I knew they were having a baby. It killed my heart. My son was only a few months old. My daughters didn’t know him so I believed if I didn’t do anything wrong and just hoped, all would be ok. But it wasn’t.

    There was never any love for me. So by the time he let me move back in with my mom with the three kids and not a clue I prayed and had faith at the time. I was ok. Months later I was blessed with a place and it was just me and my kids. For three years they were my life, my reason.

    Well, he came into money during that time. He was playing house with her and she talked him into getting the kids. So money talks. It didn’t matter that I had made them my life. I do thank God cause I have my oldest. But I do see life like those. He couldn’t love me any worst so he could never deserve me at my best.

    So God has truly blessed me with a husband now. It took six years for my prayer to be answered. I asked for a husband who would be my best friend and understand me and what I’ve been through and most of all, be a man of God. I also learned if they can just leave then they are not meant to be missed. The ones that stay, even when we are a mess, are the ones we should try harder for. And remember sometimes God will remove bad to give us good.

  4. (UNITED STATES)  Sandra, there’s a limit to the “better or worse.” I know cause I went through that and I didn’t want to be wrong in the eyes of God. Just know you’re made for better. Pray and ask God to show you his will for you and to remove all negative and harmful people from your life. He will.

  5. (USA)  Me and my wife have been married for a year and our first child is on the way. The pregnancy has really put a strain on our relationship. My relationship with God isn’t what it used to be and I now realise my marriage is following the same path. This site has helped me realise that. Thank you!

  6. (PHILIPPINES)  Thank you so much. I am so enlighten with God’s words. I am so hurt with my husband having an affair with another woman. I just couldn’t forgive him. I want to love him and forget everything, but the pain and hurt are overpowering me to hate him.

  7. (GUYANA)  I’m a married male of 5 yrs. & I’ve been struggling with how to show ‘LOVE’ to my wife. I never grew up seeing ‘Love’ in my home because my father wasn’t there. Now I’m a married man my marriage is struggling to survive. I’m struggling with the purpose as a husband and The head of the home and loving my wife the way I should.

    She told me she don’t LOVE me anymore. Hearing that, was like someone pierced a knife through your HEART. This was couple of months ago. I’ve been struggling with my identity in this marriage for years. She would tell me over & over about things she’s not happy with in the marriage. I would always promise her over & over & try my best & fall right back into the situation. I know it’s frustrating her a lot till she can’t take any more. I’m afraid of losing her. I know I don’t make her happy. I know she wants to leave me but because we’re ‘CHRISTIANS’ she’s struggling whether to stay or go.

    1. I am soon to be married, and currently combating fear because of the scripture that says, when married trouble will come. And also because my other half is silent person and it makes me fearful of sharing my full true feeling and then problems arise. I thank God I was reminded here of how I need to speak the truth in Love. I pray that we can do this no matter what and honor and enjoy one another no matter what by loving each other the way God sees fit.

      I can tell a lot of people are struggling in there marriage all over this world and my heart is heavy. One thing that registered to me the other day is that if “God hates divorce”, then the “devil loves it.” So we should fight with everything within us to not give satan the pleasure of taking joy in our pain, misunderstandings and issues that could cause us to separate and divide.

      So as a single lady soon to be married I’d like to pray and stand in agreement with the success and blooming, and rekindling of everyone’s struggling marriage, and relationship. Father God, thank you for bringing these couples together. Nothing is too hard for you and we know that whatever our heart desires we will have if we delight in you.

      So Father, we love you more than anything you are the biggest and greatest Lover of all, a MIGHTY AND MERCIFUL GOD. Thank you in all things. I bind every trick, trap, and stumbling block of the enemy in these brothers and sisters lives, relationship and marriages, even ministries. We loose love, joy, peace, awesome communication, understanding, an exciting love, a soothing unconditional love, we loose honoring, respecting and cherishing each other in our relationships. We loose everlasting unity that no one can tear apart in Jesus Name. Thank you in advance for the success with one another. I claim the blood of Jesus over these your people and my relationship w/ my soon to be husband. No weapon formed against any of us will prosper:))

  8. (USA) My God! This is a blessing of a website that I just came upon in need of some spiritual direction in my life and especially my MARRIAGE. I thank God for my 20 years together/16 years married to my great husband who is faithful, God fearing and loves me. The problem is he is lonely in our marriage and I do play a role in this along with other layers in his life. I just ask that you pray for me because I fail at being the a submissive wife. On this website it shares:

    • I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. (1 Corinthians 11:3) “Submission is a key element in the smooth functioning of any business, government, or family. God ordained submission in certain relationships to prevent chaos. It’s essential to understand that submission is not surrender, withdrawal, or apathy. It doesn’t mean inferiority, because God created all people in his image and because all have equal value. Submission is mutual commitment and cooperation.

    “Thus God calls for submission among equals. He didn’t make the man superior; he made a way for the man and woman to work together. Jesus Christ, although equal with God the Father, submitted to him to carry out the plan for salvation. Likewise, although equal to man under God, the wife should submit to her husband for the sake of their marriage and family. Submission between equals is submission by choice, not by force. We serve God in these relationships by willingly submitting to others in our church, to our spouses, and to our government leaders.” (Commentary from the New Life Application Bible)

    So, I am seeking the Lord to be a BETTER wife, seeking HIS word, spiritual direction and support. I know that – All things work together for the good…” and All things through Christ are possible.

    Thank you for this site, your sharing and Blessings!

  9. (ZIMBABWE) This is an inspiring and wonderful site for Christians. I am blessed I can feel I have the strength to overcome every trial. Thank you – stay blessed.

  10. (US) I am reading this great page of scriptures for healing a troubled marriage, praying that my husband and I find the strength to hold on to our sacred marriage, the humility to forgive and ask forgiveness, the patience to hold on and fight to make it better, and a love for each other that models the love Christ gave to us.

    My husband hid money from our family, bought things for himself although his wife and 2 kids needed it for necessities. He also developed TWO inappropriate online relationships with women. He now says he’s very sorry, so my job is forgiveness, and I’m struggling greatly to give that to him. I was raised to believe that if someone asks for forgiveness, then you grant that request. On this, I feel the betrayal so very deeply. I’m not sure I have the strength to honor the request.

    We have been in counseling several weeks and we are making slow progress, but today has been a weak day for me and I’m really growing impatient with myself for not finding forgiveness yet. Any prayers or words of encouragement would be greatly welcomed -I have run out of steam. May God bless and keep you.

  11. (US) I’m in a 2 month separation, and this site has been a true help and shining light to the do’s and don’ts in a marriage in God’s eyes. I’ve been with my wife for 10 yrs and have struggled but always overcame every obstacle that has come our way until recently. I pray and have faith that it’s not too late to finally approach things as God would want us to, but need ways to show my spouse without being a further headache to her already hectic life. Anyone willing please pray for us that God will show us favor and show us both how to be more like he wants us to be.

  12. (US) Dear Cindy, I really needed these Scriptures tonight. I am a newlywed who has been going through some rough times and I thank you for sharing these. I feel peace after such a unpleasant argument me and my husband just had. I came to a separate room, prayed, cried, read this & I am okay. I will carry this always to remind me that God is always there for me no matter what. He always has my back and I just need to trust that and believe that at all times. Thank you for that. God bless you.

    1. Leah, you have blessed my heart in letting me know that I was able to participate with God in helping you gain peace. What a privilege! Please know that what you are going through is not unusual. Being a newlywed (and being married, period) is a lot harder than most people realize it will be. It’s like what Diane Sollee said, “The public is so ill-prepared for and ill-informed about marriage— they don’t realize that the first two years of marriage is the time when a new civilization is hammered out. We mislead couples by calling it the ‘honeymoon’ phase. We send them off without the basic understanding of what to expect or the skills they’ll need to lay the foundation for a life-long marriage.”

      Dedicate yourself to praying, reading scripture and applying it with the help of the Holy Spirit, and become a student of marriage. We have a lot on our web site (starting in the newlywed topic) which God can use to help you in this mission to inform you, guide you, and help you “hammer out” and build a “new civilization” and a new life together with your husband. I pray the Lord leads you, guides you, and blesses you as you apply yourself to being a student of marriage and a student of each other.

  13. (AMERICA) I have been married to my wife and 3 kids who I love so much for almost 13 years now. With the economy being the way it is my wife has had to get a job, which has seemed to open up new kinds of problems. With a new job come a desire to have “girls nights” with the ladies from work. I don’t mind most places, but there are some places they go that really upset me expecially when most of them are either single or divorced.

    When I try to tell her how I feel she only gets upset and it turns into a fight. How can I get her to even listen to what I have to say without getting mad? It has now gotten to the point where she says she loves me but she has said she is not sure she sees herself wanting to be with me for the rest of her life. For some reason talking to her about any feelings is not an option so I have no ide a where to start. Never in life have I ever been known for being emotional, but this not knowing what the future holds, is killing me. It’s not every weekend and as long as one of those don’t come up we get along great.

  14. (KENYA) I love this site! I’ve book marked it. I have already sent the link to my finace. I am sure we will learn a lot.

  15. (NIGERIA) I am so encouraged with the little I just read from here. It’s really a building block for so many couples. Well done; keep it up!

  16. (NIGERIA) Please, I need a serious advice and Bible passages I can use to solve this issue at hand. I am planning for my wedding when I suddenly came to realise that everything that my husband does not really listen to me with my objections. Instead, he does whatever his people, especially his mother, asks of him. I have come to realise that he does not respect my opinion, but instead, his mothers.

  17. (USA) Hello, Today me and my husband had a really bad argument about something that’s so petty. The thing I’m having a hard time coping with is we always are at each other’s throat about nothing. We’ve been together for 12 years and have been married for one year, but this ist year of marriage has been miserable and depressing.

    I love my husband and I know he loves me but we never seem to tell each other our feelings without the other getting mad (lack of communication). I feel he should be stronger in the Word then he is and this makes me mad at him sometimes. I talked to one of the elders in the church today and she told me that I have to be a good servant to God before I can be a good wife, and it is best to be quiet and let him get his feelings out, rather than always having a response. She also told me that only God can change him, not me. I don’t have the power to change anyone and that all I can do is pray for him & myself, listen to him & trust in God. I understand but I don’t understand. I think I’m at my end rope with trying and I don’t want to give up because it will not be the right thing to do.

    I love my husband and I figure since we’re not dealing with infidelity, things should be better. Unfortunatly things are worse and I need to know how to fix this before we get in this to deep. How do I listen without speaking when I have never done that How do I love him even when he is been hurtful & mean? How do I pray for someone that is so full of anger? I would really like to hear from someone who has been through this and has overcome it. Thanks, Jawanda

  18. (KENYA) For a long time my love faded and I started taking my husband like liability. This started when he started showing me that I make no efforts towards family development and the much I had done turned to be his initiative. I felt rejected and vowed in my heart that I will never contribute again. Time has now passed and I have seen the need to invest more for our children but the question is will he support the project? I have already mentioned to him about it and he nods yes. All I am doing is praying. This site has opened my eyes this evening especially on submission, loving, doing things together and doing good. am greatful and I have felt encourgaed by the bible verses and I aspire to do as per the teachings. Please help me pray

  19. (SOUTH AFRICA) I thank God for landing me into this site. My heart goes out to you people and I trust that God is there in your midst. You might not see Him or feel His presence but surely He said He will never leave us nor forsake us. I have learnt that sometimes we enter into marriages with lots of baggage that we don’t drop whilst preparing for marriage. This baggage is from our past. It holds us back from moving forward.

    Lets look at Moses, a powerful man of God, how he grew up. He was born of Israelites but grew in Egypt. That was something inside of him. One day looking outside the window he saw Egyptian fighting with the Israelites, immediately what was inside of him showed outside when he killed the Egyptian. He saw outside with his eyes, and eyes are the window to our souls.

    I fully understand it’s not easy to get inside to your soul when you are still caught up in love. But it’s what we need to do. One becomes angry because of what is happening inside of him/her. Lets build ourselves by dropping the baggage we don’t need, that doesn’t add any value in our lives and we will be able to move the mountains and enjoy life. Mark 11:22-25. Let us not clothe ourselves with anger. It’s the enemy that steal and destroy our relationships. God is good all the time. Mumsy

  20. [SA] My wife and I got married from 2005 and both families didn’t accept this marriage. But we made the decision that whether they liked it or not we’re husband and wife. Another reason is that I as a husband did not pay lobola because me and my wife share everything. We’re faithful to one another. That’s why it was not easy for me and the treatment where she is coming from was not ok. This is what I wanted to say early this year.

    She found out that I was cheating and this hurt her a lot. She remembered one day before we got married her mother said “you choose Peter or me” and she chose me over her mother. Yes, I admit that after she found out about the cheating, I repented and I asked for forgiveness from God and her. But this pain doesn’t come out from her so she can forgive me. Every time she starts accusing me that I had the affair I’m irritated by that because this is continuing. What can I do?

    We have three kids together. One of the issues is that the lady that I cheated with went to inyanga for me AND MY WIFE PRAYED FOR ME. I’m healed now because I was starting to have rush on my face. My wife is the wife that is gifted by God; she is the one who knew what was happening.

    1. Peter, to answer your question, “What can I do?” is pretty straight forward. First, you need to realize that the sin you committed against your wife is no “small thing.” This is like you took a knife and cut out her heart, threw it on the floor and danced on it. That’s the kind of pain she is feeling because of your unfaithfulness. So often we men think that when we hurt our wives all we have to do is confess our wrong, ask for forgiveness and then everything will be okay – just like before – as if nothing happened. This is terribly wrong!

      You are a very fortunate man that your wife is willing to forgive you and rebuild the marriage when she had every legal and Biblical right to end the marriage. But just because she forgave you doesn’t mean she will “forget” what you did. It will take a LONG, LONG time (maybe several years) for you to rebuild trust to the point that your wife will stop “wondering” about your affair or being afraid that you are in another affair.

      God is going to have to reveal to you the pain you have caused her and give you a heart of patience and understanding and a willingness to go WAY above and beyond what is normal in order to help rebuild her trust in you. A good place for you to start to get an understanding of what needs to happen is by going back to our web site and into the topic “Surviving Infidelity.” There you will find a lot of articles and links to other web sites and resources where – if you are serious about really repairing the hurt – you will find help in understanding what she’s going through. The first article we suggest you read is called “Rebuilding Your Marriage After YOU Had an Affair” and then one called “Rebuilding Trust in Your Marriage.”

      Peter, the more you get “irritated” at your wife when she expresses more pain from the affair, the longer it will take for her to heal and to be able to trust you again. You need to flood her with sympathy for what you did rather than get angry/irritated.

      I also want to strongly advise you that you need to find some other Christian men who can hold you accountable regarding your vulnerability to having another affair. You need to put protection in your life because if it happened once, it can most certainly can happen again. You are obviously weak in this area when it comes to other women. Don’t ever think that if your wife forgave you once, she’ll let you get away with it again.

      It’s time for you to “Man Up” and “love your wife the way that Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for it.” (Ephesians 5:25) If I was you, Peter, I would be on my knees every day asking God to help me love my wife and sacrifice MY life so that she will know how much I see her as His gift to me and I am responsible to love the way God loves her.

      I truly hope you take these suggestions seriously, because if you do then it shows just how repentant you are for your sin and how much you really want your marriage to be a living testimony of what Christ can do in even a broken relationship. Blessings! ~Steve Wright

  21. I’m a 29 year old man, been married for a year and a bit; we have a beautiful daughter of 4 months old. But things are going down hill. My wife and I are not seeing face to face anymore. I’ve moved out for a month. That is what she wanted. She said she needs time to think. I’ve been out the house for 2 weeks now and I’m hurting and afraid it’s not going to work out. Does anyone have advice for me?

    1. Hi…Pray to God. Be patient…Be faithful to your wife…It will all work out for the best. ☺

  22. We’ve been married for three years and it’s kind of struggle in our relationship since beginning but I love my wife a lot. She is 35 and I am 32. My family hasn’t liked her from beginning because she’s tall and fat; but I love her and now they love here a lot too as a daughter. But she got annoyed so quick because I work hard as a truck driver and stay out from home days after days. I try keep her happy but she thinks I don’t love her and that I’ve changed, but I haven’t. I love her the way I used to be before but the only thing is that she lives with a joined family so there are always problems. She doesn’t want anyone to interfere in her business. I don’t understand. Please give me advice and pray for us to have a strong relationship. Thank you.

  23. This site is very inspiring and helpful as compared to a lot of others! I’m teary eyed yet hopeful! Thanks for all the scripture and thoughtful, solid content!

  24. I have this saved as a shortcut on my phone and open it to read scriptures from time to time. I emplore anyone who sees this to please visit I continue to stand for my marriage after almost a year of finding out about my husband’s sins. Charlyne Cares is a daily devotional that I can undoubtedly say God gave me to grow my faith and believe for my husband’s reconciliation to Christ and our marriage. I would’ve given up by now, but I’m so glad I didnt.

    My husband and I remain married and now we talk like old friends. His heart is softening towards me after many months of indignation bordering a line of hatred. The Holy Spirit is breaking down the impenetrable walls of my husband’s heart. He says he loves me and we speak of a future together. The completed work of restoration is under construction and I see encouraging progress almost daily. I’ve been in the depths of despair and cried bitter tears from the pain of rejection and betrayal. Remember, your spouse’s soul is at stake. See, love and forgive them the same as Christ does.

    Just the idea that you’re looking on this site shows that you have what it takes, you have the desire and you know where to find the right answers (in His word). God bless you all and please pray that the Lord continue to heal hurting marriages and resurrect the dead ones. Nothing is impossible for those who believe. We serve a God that uses all things for our good and His glory. Let this mess become your message. God has a plan for you and your spouse’s lives and He hasn’t broken His end of the covenant, how dare we! Love is a choice, a daily decision. Choose everyday to love your spouse and honor your covenant. He’s a God with many miracles… if you ask, He’s got one for your marriage and family.

  25. Hi I request that you please pray for my marriage as it’s going through a hard patch right now. I have two children, a 4 year old and a baby, whose soon to be one. May God bless you!

  26. I am a true believer of God and Christ his son. My wife is also and believer. But I am struggling with possible infidelity that may have crept in our union. I work out of town, and there are times I come home missing my wife a great deal. And the feelings are mutual on the phone but not the same when I’m here. It’s not equally felt. She has an obsession with social media and has a few different accounts. I’ve told her how I feel about some of the networks such as instagram. I’ve heard quite a bit about people persuing others and indecent photo being passed and I said I don’t approve of it. She tells me it’s just family members she’s consulting with. There is more but I need some advice and prayers to keep the devil from corrupting my marriage… Lost at home and afar.

    1. Do you have proof of infidelity? A person does not like to be accused of a wrong if it is not there. I would get proof first. Also praying for your wife is essential…She needs help with learning how to submit to you and respect your feelings.

  27. I need some advice. I am a believer and my husband isn’t. He believes there is something out there, but doesn’t know what and doesn’t believe in the Bible. Now he’s telling me monogamy as well and has always fantasized about open-marriage. He turned 50 in Jan. and is having a huge middle-age life crisis, evaluating his future, debt, job, and me, a recovering alcoholic. He says he doesn’t love me like he used to and has been unhappy for the last 10 years.

    Now that our youngest is almost 18, perhaps he feels he isn’t needed anymore. Who knows? He wants a separation but wants to date and have relations with other women, and to see if there is someone out there that is more compatible with him. He blames all on me. He needs time. I put my foot down and said I would not agree to such an agreement even though it’s financially more advantageous for me. My pride comes first so I said we end it now and I want a divorce.

    He said he doesn’t want to close the door completely but says he sees divorce more than a reconciliation. Is there hope for us b/c he is a non-believer? Says he will never change and he has no problem with me going to church and being involved. He actually encourages it. Says I need to find someone more in line with my beliefs. My values and morals are different than his. My heart hurts so much. Yesterday was our 29th anniversary.

  28. I’m not quite sure that I understand what a “coping situation” is. Will you explain that term please?

  29. I have been married for 20 years. We have two children. My husband has left us to live back in his country, Spain. I love him like the first day and even more but he has a drug problem and apparently Spain is more lenient on drug issues. He was born there. Does anyone live in Alicante Spain that I can talk to?

  30. Well, I’m not married yet. The thing is Men Partnership made a vow that no one will break us apart no matter what happens we will always be together. It was a vow we took together and yes, we are still deeply in love even now. But now problems seem to apply not to me and him, but that people surrounding us are against us.

    At church we were told to break up and I will have to choose whether I want to serve God or him. I mean my whole life I have been wanting to serve God. Moreover to him it is worse because he will be cut as an assistant; he will have to choose. So now I feel guilty about all of this. I love the guy to an extent that I can’t see myself without him. Please tell me what to do.

    1. Bianca, I’m not sure I understand. Why are people in your church telling you to break up? Are you both followers of Christ? Are there spiritual differences? Please clarify a bit. :)