Dollar Photo Rings on BibleWe’re asked the question often, “Should I get a divorce?” Our answer to them is, “that’s not for us to tell you. We’re told in the Bible that “what God has put together let no man tear apart.” That includes us. Instead, we encourage them to pray and to read the Bible, asking God to lead them. This is a personal decision between them and God —”a cord of three strands.

With that in mind, here is a starting point for you. Carefully and prayerfully read the following scriptures that concern divorce:

Deuteronomy 24:1-4:

If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD. Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.

Malachi 2:13-16:

Another thing you do: You flood the LORD’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accept them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring.

So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. “I hate divorce,” says the LORD God of Israel, “and I hate a man’s covering himself [or his wife] with violence as well as with his garment,” says the LORD Almighty.

Matthew 5:31-32:

[Jesus said] It has been said, “Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.” But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

Matthew 19:3-9:

Some Pharisees came to him [Jesus] to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

“Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

Mark 10:2-12:

Some Pharisees came and tested him [Jesus] by asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” “What did Moses command you?” he replied. They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied. “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”

Luke 16:18:

Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Romans 7:2-3:

By law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress, even though she marries another man.

1 Corinthians 7:10-11:

To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

1 Corinthians 7:12-14:

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

1 Corinthians 7:15-16:

But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

1 Corinthians 7:27:

Are you married? Do not seek a divorce.


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Filed under: Separation and Divorce

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99 responses to “SCRIPTURES ON DIVORCE

  1. (USA) Well, I’m a recovering addict. I have been 5 months clean and sober. Me and my wife are separated now and I feel this is it. I relapsed numerous times before, but I know this time is my last because I’m tired. My wife is dating now and my 5 year old son is there. I love my wife,but I’m so confused as to what to do. I know I messed up a lot in the past, but I believe God has all power and I don’t want to lose my wife and child!!!

  2. (US) My ex-husband wants to get remarried. He was married again after we were divorced a few years ago. It didn’t work. He has reached out to me to remarry. Is that wrong?

    1. Why would this be wrong? The only thing is that you need to work on the areas of your relationship that led your first marriage to each other in a troubled direction. Just because you’ve been apart, it doesn’t mean that you’re more mature in handling the same issues. You need to work on them first (and continue to work on them if you marry) and THEN marry, with the resolve that this is for life –we will not hop in and out of marriage again. We WILL work things out and never allow the “D” word to creep into our thinking, vocabulary, or actions again.

      Now, one aside however, if the problems you had centered on infidelity issues –character issues of integrity and faithfulness and truthfulness, then you have a problem that might not be able to be resolved. Character issues are “who you are when no one else but God is looking.” And if that is flawed, then that person can’t be trusted. Unless you BOTH vow (and mean it with all of your heart) that you will be exclusive with each other in every way and work on ways to guard your hearts from straying in any way, remarriage wouldn’t be good. You cannot share your heart, or any other part of your being with any other person that is supposed to be exclusively shared with your spouse and with your God. I hope this helps.

  3. (NAMIBIA) Good day to all of you! I desperately hope and pray that you can give me something to work with. I got married 4 years ago, after meeting my husband about 3 months before. Just before the wedding, I had called off the wedding because I realised that, not only did I not know this man, but also that he wasn’t who I wanted to spend my life with. My family (and him) put a lot of pressure on me to continue with the weddding regardless of what I was going through. And so I did. While making my wvowes, I asked God to please forgive me for lying because I did not mean my “I do” because I was getting out the first chance I got!

    Things didn’t go well and less than a year into our marriage, we were separated, for 2 years and 8 moths. As a Christian woman I went back and we tried to make it work, for close to ten months now. A couple of night ago, we spoke and concluded that it isn’t working. My husband said to me that we obey God’s work because we love Him, not out of fear and that God looks at our hearts and not our actions. He said that God will not recognise a “convenant” that was not done wholeheartedly and that I shouldn’t fear God punishing me, because God knows my heart.

    We are busy with the divorce arrangements, currently. Was this marriage ever recognised by God? How will this divorce affect issues of remarriage, because I don’t want to spend the rest of my life alone, especially if I was coerced into a marriage.

  4. (UNITED STATES) I have been married by law for 2 years and by the church for a year. I prayed so hard for God to give me a man that would respect me and love me as his wife. The man I married has 2 daughters, which one of them lived with us at the age of 15 she has not been going to school and slashes herself. In good faith, I took her in. She brought chaos into our life; she is now 18.

    My husband has a temper. He is verbally, physically abusive, addicted to pornography, sexual addictions, and is an adulterer. He has called me names ugly, old, damaged, a piece of (bad words) and so on. He would hit me punching me on the stomach, put his hand around my neck dragging me from our bedroom to the bathroom. He whipped me with a belt. More of our arguments are about his daughter, ex wife, women, pornography. He says I block him from doing the things he wanted to do. He never respected me as his wife or even protected me.

    Three weeks ago he hurt me again and his daughter said she wanted to smack me. He tolerated all the bad things she does. The next morning I went to church and then the hospital for I felt I had a bumps on my legs. His friends and family condones all his behavior. He claimed he is Holy Sprit filled but acts the opposite. I never believed in divorce but he will file so he can fulfill his fleshly desires.

    I know there are women and men like me. Please remember you are not alone. I don’t have a job, am financially dry and have been moving from one home to another. This is a huge trial for me but God works in mysterious ways. Please never lose hope. God is close to the brokenhearted and even if it seems that evil is ruling your life. God has a plan, something you can’t imagine. Please pray for me for financial blessings, strength, wisdom and continuously holding on to my faith. This I ask in Jesus name, Amen

  5. (UNITED STATES) I am divorced now for the second time. My first marriage was very short at a very young age. My second husband had an addiction to opiates. His family and I convinced him to go to a rehabilitation center for 3 months. After being released he failed a state required drug test and was sentenced to 6 months in a state funded rehab. After being released he began doing it again. He had been physicaly and mentally abusive during the marriage. I guess what I’m asking is am I terrible for filing for divorce? I feel convicted and sad. Like I’ve disappointed God. Like if I’m not there with him (my ex husband) and he overdoses, it will somehow be partly my fault because I divorced him. Please pray that I have comfort and guidance.

    1. (UK) No, he needs to grow up and stop playing victim. What you can do is be there for him. There is no need to blame yourself for divorce. He just isn’t taking it well. You mentioned he was physically and mentally abusive in the marriage? Why would you want to put yourself through that? Divorcing someone for those hurtful reasons was the right choice you made. Be strong and pray that he will be ok someday.

  6. My husband committed adultery. I prayed and God showed me all kinds of things on his phone. He was talking to several partners and has sex with one!! I never thought I’d take him back, then my son found pictures of him with a man!!! The man was giving him oral sex. Never in a million years would I have thought he would have found something like that!!! I took him back again. He swore it was from years ago and the man was threading him. But that doesn’t make sense. Ten years ago there was no email. Now I’m broken and confused and scared and pretty sure he never stopped looking at porn. It was all a put on.

    1. Gloria, please trust your instincts here, as you pray. God will lead you to truth as you continue to pray that He will reveal it to you. I believe God is trying to protect you and your son from future behavior, on your husband’s part, that could hurt you even more. As truth is revealed, ask God to show you what to do with it. That which is hidden can cause more harm than having it all exposed to the light and then asking God for wisdom on what to do about it.

  7. Please pray for my marriage for my husband filed a divorce last July 3, 2014 and I really don’t want it. We have a 3 month old baby and I still love him so much. We’ve had problems in the past but I know everything can be fixed. Now all I have is my faith that God will lead my way and for only him can change everything.

  8. Please pray for me. My husband and I have been separated for 3 months and now my husband filed for divorce. I dont want to get a divorce; I have a 2 year old son with him. He says he loves me but still wants a divorce. Because we can’t get along, I dont understand that. I ask that the Lord will guide me and my children.

  9. To whom it may concern, I gave up. She no longer cares and is still committed to divorcing me and also pointing fingers at me while using the lamest excuse: God wouldn’t want this for me: Hi, my name is Mike and here’s my situation in shorts terms. Me and Angela (still my wife) met at the age of 23. We’re 5 days apart. When I met her she already had a beautiful girl by the name of Jazmine who was about to be two. The biological dad wasn’t around. I fell in love with both.

    As time went on and raised Jazmine as my child even adopted her. Time goes by like 8 years so I ask Angela to marry me. We had a big wedding with over 500 guests. Time kept going on and as of now married for 6 making it a total of 14 years together. Jazmine now is 16 and us, we’re almost 39. I know marriages have their ups and downs and that God does put them thru tests of strength. I guess she blames me so let’s just say it’s my fault. I have a long work history of over 20 + years. In my last job I worked 72 hours weekly with a lot of travel. I saw it destroying my family so 2 years ago I quit for sake of my marriage.

    I was stressed, depressed, and angry, you name. So I starting using drugs as a sedative. My wife caught me and threw me out. My in laws to live on the street with no job because idiot me, I said family first. So I came to my parents putting us 15 apart in distance. She said she didn’t want me like that yet would help me so that I was on my own. It was a two year battle exactly to this month. I was depressed from missing them and not allowed around them, to witnessing my father have a stroke with no health insurance, to bank foreclosing on their home where I reside, in a drug infested gang swarmed area, to have my car stolen along with 80% of personal belongings, while I suffered major health issues, yet no job but help parents who now own home. All this in one year. So I used frequently with a goal of wanting to quit to reconcile with them… I fell, fell, and fell while shedding tears missing my two dogs, a wife, and a daughter I adopted. I almost committed suicide.

    To make a log story short I admitted myself to a mental home and have been 15 days sober and planning to stay that way with help of programs. Now my wife is saying it’s too late that I took too long. It wasn’t easy but I succeeded cause I saw the prize at the end… them. Two months ago she had my back and now no. I was feeling her love was fake or was she seeing someone else yet doesn’t care what I feel or her daughter as long as she is happy and is now throwing all the bad times we had in our 15 years together just to seal the deal.

    We are currently attend a good church. I’m going to be baptised on Mother’s Day yet she stands in church singing, playing the Christian role but still wants divorce after I faght so hard and help her raise a child I really didn’t have to. I’m raised Catholic and marriage as one but now study Christianity and love it. I kept trying to keep faith and tell her God tested us, but nope, it’s not changing her life and now I’m back to being depressed, and crying because I believe and love her so much. She is destroying my dreams and yesterday after church, now my faith.

    What is wrong with her? Usually the man does all that while the woman cries. I might admit myself again. If not I might use again to numb my pain, which I don’t want to and my daughter misses me so. I give up. I can’t change her heart even with prayer. It’s so sad because when I cry or get upset she tells me you’re just mad because my life is fine and yours isn’t and you hate seeing me happy. Yet I thought she was my crutch through life. I’m tormented and will not take her back if she does test the waters to realize and tries to come back. I took my vows seriously and I thought she would too, yet she’s about to sin commit adultery and ruin her daughter’s beliefs for love. Need assistance. Thanks.

    1. Mike… we’re so sad for you in the ways your marriage and your life has turned in such a painful direction. You are on the right path, in some ways, to go in a healthier direction with YOUR OWN life… please keep going on in this direction. I don’t know if your wife will change the path she has put herself upon. It could be… I don’t know. She has the gift of a free will, just as you do. I also don’t know all of the circumstances –not hearing her side. I’m sorry we can’t call her. You gave the phone number in your original comment for us to call her, but we just can’t do that. We are not counselors, plus, she did not approach us… for both reasons (and more), we just can’t call her. Sorry.

      But we encourage you to talk to your pastor and also to go back to the rehab center that helped you to get back on your feet this last time. Please talk to a counselor there to get your bearings back into the right direction again, so you don’t fall into taking “sedatives” again. This is a very vulnerable time for you. There’s also the ministry of Teen Challenge (you can find their centers throughout the U.S.), who do a GREAT job of helping guys in your type of difficult situations. Don’t let the word “teen” fool you — they work with a LOT of men (and women) who are older (some MUCH older) with GREAT results.

      Your wife is obviously not going to allow herself to be your “crutch” right now. I don’t know what the future will bring, but for this present time, you need to find help elsewhere. Who knows what this will do for ALL of you, as you reach out for additional help? You’re at an important crossroad right now. Please don’t allow yourself to fall. Your daughter, especially, needs to see that when someone is down, they reach out for healthy help and can get up again in a redeeming way. Who knows what example this will be for her –perhaps, even helping her later in life, as well as for others who are watching your life? And for your wife to see, and for YOU to live out –it’s important to reach out for help that IS available, and get back up again in a good way, no matter what comes our way.

      I pray for you Mike. I’ve seen some miraculous, life-changing turn-arounds within the church, and through Teen Challenge, and such. I KNOW you can do this if you will make the right choice. Don’t do this for your wife, or for any other reason, other than for you to get on a better track –one in which God can help you on, once you make the first steps to turn from the destructive paths that you are now staring at… don’t go there. You can do this… I know you can, and am believing for you.

  10. Just a short a few thoughts I’ve written regarding Divorce to my wife, as I may be heading there soon :-(

    No marriage is perfect or exempt from marital tribulations, Christian or otherwise. Yet ours has undergone so many spiritual onslaughts on top of everything besides. However, our marriage would not come remotely close to the many I’ve been copiously researching, and yet by God’s Grace they were saved. Our marriage is precious to the Lord as we both desire to love and serve him. “In the day of prosperity be joyful, but in the day of adversity consider: God also hath set the one over against the other, to the end that man should find nothing after him.” (Ecclesiastes 7:14). “Shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?” (Job 2:10)

    Divorce is a most sinister and destructive evil to befall any family, and that has been made so encouragingly easy and appealing by today’s apostate church liberalism and also, which is shamelessly glamourized by the world of celebrity and by the godless secular philosophy and humanistic reasoning of the day. And without due warning or any conscious consideration, countless marriages have fallen needlessly headlong into all sorts of lifelong and devastating miseries and regrets, which divorce carries with it in its wake. It has also been described as the sin of unforgiveness.

    Christ said the reason divorce even existed was because of the hardness of the heart. Where most marriages, no matter how beyond repair they seem, are and can be restored, with proper Christian support and prayer, and above all the ‘Spirit of forgiveness’, which is of Christ. For a bruised reed shall he not break, and smoking flax shall he not quench.

    The Lord hates divorce (Malachi 2:16), Reconciliation and forgiveness in Christ is the most honourable resolution with Him (Ephesians 4:32), (Colossians 3:13) We have all of God’s promises at our disposal. It’s Satan who deceives our minds into thinking that there is no way forward. We mustn’t let him rob us of our family and our beliefs in God’s covenant promises for us. “What therefore God has joined together let not man separate” (Mark 10:9), and “till death do us part.”

    Comments & Prayers are very much appreciated during this dark time in my life. Thank you! Bill

  11. Marriage is a covenant between The Creator and the couple it’s not a contract between the court and the couple so a piece of paper means nothing HalleluYAH!

  12. My husband of 23 years left me and our children to move in with a woman from his past and moved 1800 miles away. She supposedly is religious but I don’t understand if she is religious why would she be committing adultery by living with a married man. She knows about me and she even has helped my husband fill out divorce papers. He has no communication with our children since they questioned why was he doing this to our family and didn’t give a good enough reason.

    Our daughters call him selfish, childish and want nothing to do with him. I have tried to tell them to keep lines of communication open but they deleted his contact info. One of my sons is torn and is extremely hurt by my husbands decision and only texts every once in a while. Why do men feel the need to destroy a family over another woman? I am left here picking up the pieces and taking my children to counseling because of his decisions. I pray one day soon he will see how wrong he was to do what he did and apologize to God.