De-escalating Fights in Marriage

If Cindy and I (Steve) are going to be transparent with you we did not fight in healthy ways earlier in our marriage. In fact, our approach was quite toxic. It was all about “winner take all.” Does that ring familiar with how you and your spouse argue? If so, Read More…

De-escalating Fights in Marriage

It’s confession time. We did not fight in healthy ways with each other in the first years of our marriage. In fact, our approach was toxic. It was all about, “Winner takes all.” And that is anything but healthy. We yelled, screamed and acted childishly. And we are not proud Read More…

Delaying Confrontations in Marriage

Delaying confrontations with your spouse can sometimes cause problems. Waiting and piling one problem on top of another can be problematic. But on the other hand, sometimes it’s a good thing—particularly when it’s a time to H.A.L.T. That would be a time when either of you is Hungry, Angry, or Read More…

Lord, We’re Exhausted!

Have you ever felt like you have used up the end of your reserves and you are totally exhausted? That’s what we’re feeling. We’ve had our sons, daughter-in-laws, and grandkids visiting and staying in our home for the past 2+ months. The last of our grown “kids” just left. We’re Read More…

Going to Bed Angry?

When we’re told to “not let the sun go down on our anger” does that mean if we’re arguing about something and it’s getting late, we have to stay up until it’s resolved? Not necessarily. But what about going to bed angry? How can you get away from that one? Read More…

Timing Your Talks – MM #320

“Most people who are happily married have learned a great deal about when NOT to say things. They know that often WHEN something is said is every bit as important as WHAT is said. It’s the timing that makes a positive difference.” (Margaret Davidson Campolo) That unfortunately, is what Steve Read More…

Wind Down Time – MM #251

What do you do with the situation where a spouse comes home from work exhausted and the other spouse wants to “talk” instead of allowing them to wind down for a while? Let’s say that’s happening to you. When you tell them you’re tired, they complain that either you don’t Read More…

Warning: Bad Mood in Progress

I recently read a blog written by “Paula” titled, “Bad Day Warning.” It caused me to remember my own experiences on this issue. It also got me to laughing (kind of). And now, it got me to writing this blog, with a purpose in mind. I’m talking about a “bad mood” Read More…