Expert Marriage Advice

God has been impressing upon us to share with you some expert marriage advice. In other words, this is advice we’ve gleaned from some great marriage experts. And WOW! We found some great stuff! The Marriage Missions web site is filled with it. We tell you this not to brag (truly), but to point out that there is SO MUCH great advice available. These “experts” have learned to walk the walk, as much as they talk the talk. So they truly are experts.

So, pray, read, glean, and see what you can apply in your own marriage. We hope your spouse will join you in reading this advice. Then talk about the marriage tips that are given. This can be a great bonding experience for both of you.

But before we go into the “expert marriage advice” we found for you, here is a humorous video that gives advice of a different kind. We’ve wanted to give this advice sometimes, but it sure takes bravery! And yet, in many situations, it sure is applicable. See what you think:

Now, for the more serious yet important stuff to apply to marriage. We’re going to cascade one piece of advice off of the next. So, you may need to read it more than once because the advice is rich! So here goes:

To start out, here is some expert marriage advice from Steve Arteburn:

“Don’t use faith, the Bible, or God as a hammer.” Remember: “God did not send His Son into the world to condemn it, but to save it.” (John 3:17) • “Let love be your guidepost.” We are told in the Bible, “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful. It is not proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-5) “Make it your goal to create a marriage that feels like it is the safest place on earth.” (Gary Smalley)

Keep in mind:

“The best time to love with your whole heart is always now, this moment, because no breath beyond the current is promised.” (Fawn Weaver) This goes with another insight along that line: “The greatest weakness of most humans is their hesitancy to tell others how much they love them while they’re still alive.” (Orlando Battista) Today is a great day to say, “I love you!”

Here’s some additional expert advice to prayerfully consider:

“To get divorced because love has died, is like selling your car because it has run out of gas.” (Diane Sollee) Work to grow your marriage. It won’t automatically grow without some help. It takes effort, and time. “People say love doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend renewing it daily.” (Sheila Wray Gregoire) MAKE the time to grow your love for each other. “Don’t devote so much energy to the ‘squeaky wheel’ that you shortchange the people [spouse] in your life who matter the most.” (John Maxwell) Make your spouse a priority.

And if you’re going through tough times right now, remember:

“No matter how you started out, God can re-write your story and give you an ending you never thought possible.” (Ngina Otiende)

And we know that is true. God did that in our marriage, and we’ve seen Him do it in countless others. Please take encouragement from that. Don’t buy the lie that just because things are one way now, they will always be that way. We serve a God of redemption. Even if you have a stubborn spouse, look to God and do things His way, even if it doesn’t make sense right now.

This goes along with two more great pieces of advice:

“Our circumstances will not automatically line up to support our marriage vows. It’s our job to make sure they do.” (Ngina Otiende) “Love convinces a couple that they are the greatest romance that has ever been, that no two people have ever loved as they do. They vow to sacrifice absolutely anything in order to be together. And then marriage asks them to prove it.” (Mike Mason)

Most Importantly, remember:

“We won’t have an extraordinary relationship with our spouse when we settle for an ordinary relationship with God.” (Justin and Trisha Davis) “To expect a close, loving marriage without relying on the Lord is foolhardy.” (Dr. James Dobson)

Above any other “expert marriage advice, keep in mind: