Facebook Quotes – Page 11

This is the 11th page we’ve created with various Facebook quotes, which we posted on the Marriage Missions Facebook page.

The following are a number of quotes that Marriage Missions International individually posted on our Facebook site as marriage tips, which can still be used in a variety of ways:


• A church, ministry, counseling organization, or an individual can use them to share on their Facebook site, if desired.

• They can be used as points of discussion in marriage classes, mentoring, counseling, or coaching situations.

• Couples or individuals can use these quotes to discuss or consider the issues raised, allowing the Holy Spirit, our Wonderful Counselor, to speak further to them.

They make great discussion points for those couples who want to use them for conversation starters for a 22 Minute Date (the guidelines are posted in the Romantic Ideas topic). Just make sure, if you use these quotes in a dating situation, you don’t get into heated arguments over them.

The point in sharing these marriage tips is to build marital relationship bridges, not construct walls of contention, causing a breakdown of communication. You can constructively disagree with these tips and with each other, and still learn more about each other and grow closer together, in the process.

It is our sincere hope that the tips below will help marriage. As you read them, please consider:

1. Do you agree or disagree? Why or why not?

2. Do you have further thoughts on the issue to apply personally or as a general rule? (If you’re reading them with someone else, please share.)

3. Do any scriptures come to mind, which apply to the marriage tip given? (If so, please share.)

The following are quotes to note for your use (each paragraph we were able to glean stands on its own —for your knowledge, the original sources are noted afterward in parenthesis):

“If there’s something important your spouse has done that has hurt you, use the sandwich approach. Be aware of the fact that few, if any, people find it easy to own their mistakes. But if you start with a word of praise or encouragement, then bring in the correction and finish your sentence with something positive, you make it safe for core issues to be heard and received. You long to feel accepted. So does your spouse.” (Anne Bercht, from the Beyondaffairs.com article, “Going from Argument to Harmony”)

“In our marriages we see each other fail. If your spouse is repentant, God’s heart is for you to respond with comfort and forgiveness. It’s easy to keep that long list of offenses and mistakes our spouse has made and use it when we need leverage in a dispute. But what an opportunity we miss when we keep score! 2 Corinthians 2:7: ’…forgive and comfort, otherwise such a one might be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow.’” (April Motl, from Crosswalk.com article, “Making Your Marriage a Safe Place”)

“Is there anything more beautiful than a young couple clasping hands & pure hearts on the path of marriage? Is anything more beautiful than young love? Yes, it’s seeing an old man and an old woman finishing their journey together on that path. Their hands are gnarled, but still clasped; their hearts are physically tired, but still strong with love for one another. A more beautiful thing than young love is old love.” (Author unknown)

“To those who haven’t experienced hardship as a couple: it will come. I say this not to bring you down, but as a warning to be prepared. Jesus promised in John 16:33 that we will have trouble. Get ready. Talk with your spouse about dealing with hardship. Commit to one another that you’ll stay strong and pray together that the Lord will guide you thru it together. We cannot be fools when it comes to being ill-prepared.” (Erin Baxter, Gleaned from Mystery32.com article, “HOLD ON.”)

“Many arguments erupt like a lit match to gasoline because of a harsh start-up. You do or say something that hurts your spouse, or vice versa. The offended party likely says “you …” The person on the receiving end feels attacked. They try to explain why they did what they did, making matters worse. It comes off as justification instead of understanding. Make no mistake, it takes maturity to have a great marriage.” (Anne Bercht, from the Beyondaffairs.com article, “Going from Argument to Harmony”)

In marriage: “happiness is best viewed as a by-product rather than a goal. A relationship that has personal happiness as its main goal is going to miss some deeper things that underlie a long-lasting marriage. Selflessness, surrender, intimacy, joy, peace and holiness all come to mind as worthy goals, but are things that also tend produce happiness as a result. Ultimately God is our only reliable source of happiness.” (Scott Means, from Surrenderedmarriage.org article, “Own Your Own Happiness”)

“Sometimes we tend to build monuments to pain when a spouse says something that hurts us. We tend to attach it to past pain, therefore compiling more than really needs to be there. We need to learn to put down the magnifying glass and take a look at things the way they are and not magnify them. Pick and choose your battles. Not everything needs to be addressed. If it does, do it in a way that won’t magnify the situation.” (Donna Sacher Hurd, from Marriage Missions Facebook comment posted 3/2/2011)

“It takes maturity to have a great marriage.” When you conflict with your spouse and they’re angry: “Be willing to listen and seek to understand. If your spouse gets a chance to share what they are angry or hurting about, it will diffuse the situation. Decide to be the bigger person, and to genuinely listen instead of talking. Your spouse is not insane. If they are upset, there is a good reason. Find it. Empathize.” (Anne Bercht, from the Beyondaffairs.com article, “Going from Argument to Harmony”)

“God is calling families like yours today to be counter-cultural in establishing a lifestyle that communicates at a glance, ‘This family is different. They’re distinctive in their beliefs and practices. They represent Jesus Christ.’ There’s no reason why so many Christian marriages should end in divorce.” Consider: “How would an outsider tell the difference between your family and one who didn’t claim to be Christian?” (Excerpted from Moments With You by Dennis and Barbara Rainey)

“We defeat a spouses’ good intentions when we criticize how they do things. Picking apart the way a spouse does a task guarantees he/she won’t do it again. Re-doing a task after a spouse has done it hurts as much as saying, ‘You did it wrong.’ It’s the same message. If we want our spouses to share household chores, praise and appreciation can help achieve that goal. Criticism and nit-picking can have an opposite effect.” (Alicia Howe, gleaned from the Todayschristianwoman.com article, “My Job’s Bigger than Your Job”)

“Men, if you want to touch your wife’s body, touch her heart 1st. Talk with her. Consider vacuuming as foreplay! If you have young kids, take over bedtime duties. Give your wife time to make the transition from mommy to a woman! Be sensitive to her needs. Women, stop treating your man like he’s a Neanderthal or a cretin because he wants to have sex. This is his God-given desire and his best way of connecting with you.” (Cindy Sigler Dagnan, gleaned from the Todayschristianwoman.com article, “Beating the Bedroom Blues”)

“Sometimes the root of your conflict is that one of you is too tired, stressed, scape goating (mad about something else and reacting to your spouse), dealing with hormones, chemical imbalance, negative reaction to medication, or you’re overwhelmed. Do all you can to get proper rest, eat well and reduce stress in your life. If you aren’t able to do this, be aware of how physiology may be affecting you or your spouse.” (Anne Bercht, from the Beyondaffairs.com article, “Going from Argument to Harmony”)

“Here’s an interesting question to ask your husband [or wife]: ‘What have I done in the past, that you liked, that I’ve stopped doing? Take the time to explore why you stopped doing it, how your lives have changed and how you might go about making that a part of your current situation'” -Lori Byerly. “Let us not love [merely] in theory or in speech but in deed and in truth (in practice and in sincerity). 1 John 3:18

“Resolving conflict is a balancing act. By purposefully holding back honest communication, the silent partner in marriage can stunt the growth of the relationship. The opposite characteristic —being the overly dominant spouse, also has pitfalls. By finding appropriate balance between these extremes, we create a better marriage. More importantly, these characteristics often carry over into our relationship with God.” (Matthew D. Turvey, from Focusonthefamily.com article, “Fighting Fair”)

In marriage: “It’s the little ways of celebrating that can pack the most joy. They make an otherwise ordinary moment more special, and often end up stirring your love for each other more deeply. Moments like these frame your experiences together and highlight all the wonder and gratitude of being together. Done right, you’ll feel it all over again. If you look for these chances you’ll start to find them everywhere.” (From Couplethingsblog.wordpress.com article, “Creating a Moment”)

“The life of a person who believes in Jesus Christ is developed by responses to not only happy things, but also to difficulties, which include weaknesses. We’re told in Colossians 3:12-13 to ‘put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, & forgiving each other.’ My spouse’s weaknesses are not hindrances. Instead, they’re the doorway to spiritual growth.” -B. Elliff (Bill Elliff, gleaned from Familylife.com article, “8 Lies That Destroy Marriage”)

“Compliment as often as you can, as long as your words are sincere. On the days when something visible (such as a new haircut or tie) doesn’t capture your attention, find another way to offer a compliment. For example, ‘You’re such a devoted father (mother).’ People in healthy relationships know it’s important to compliment good character traits in their mate. People in poor relationships tend to skip over them.” (Laurie Puhn, from the Growthtrac.com article “Five Vital Marriage Habits”)

“To keep minor points of difference, little things your spouse does from becoming irritants and obstacles in your relationship, deny yourself, like Jesus said. Rather than insisting your way is right in matters of minor importance, let some stuff go. Rather than nagging and nitpicking, which is like being nibbled to death by a duck, express your dislikes in ways that don’t rankle, threaten and lead to even bigger blowups.” (Excerpted from “Moments With You” by Dennis and Barbara Rainey)

When conflicting with your spouse: “Use Repair Attempts. When something has gone sideways, give a little space, but also look for ways to re-open the lines of communication. Here are some things that can work: Apologize, an act of kindness (such as bring them their favorite drink or do the dishes), say something nice, touch them gently, sometimes appropriately placed humor can also help (caution and wisdom is needed).” (Anne Bercht, from the Beyondaffairs.com article, “Going from Argument to Harmony”)

Connect and reconnect: “When you were single, dating was a time to talk, laugh, and have fun together. You took time to learn more about each other, about your past and your dreams for the future. But here’s the deal: Now that you’re married, you need to do the same thing! You need to continue to talk, laugh and have fun together! You need to learn more about each other! Dating each other shouldn’t stop with marriage.” (Dr. Gary and Barb Rosberg, from the Crosswalk.com article, “How to Date Your Spouse”)

Don’t let electronics sabotage your relationship. “Is it time to minimize distractions and enjoy some depth in your marriage relationship? Find a way to let tools of work, entertainment devices, screens and games be relegated to when you actually choose them, not when they choose you. Create some distraction free zones and pockets of time. Turn your phone(s) off during together times. Determine not to live distracted.” (From Couplethingsblog.wordpress.com article, “Me Distracted? Did You Say Something?”)

In marriage: “No matter where you are, you can do better. No matter how many wrong or unloving behaviors you have dealt with [in your own behavior], there’s another one you can work on. The goal is to always be growing. It’s good to look at what you have overcome —to be encouraged by what you have beaten. Allow that to urge you on to more.” Strain to be all Christ created you to be, within your circumstances. (Paul Byerly gleaned from The-generous-husband.com article, “Onward and Upward”)

“Your spouse needs to come to the top of your priority list —just a bubble behind Jesus. You need to give your spouse priority access to your time —instead of just the leftovers. Priority time for your spouse means occasional date nights and getaway weekends, but also smaller time slots, such as having dinner together, taking a brief walk, spending time talking, playing a game, or watching a favorite program together.” (Dr. Gary and Barb Rosberg, gleaned from the Crosswalk.com article, “How to Date Your Spouse”)

“Watch your husband [wife] and look for good things to say about him and to him [or about her and about her]. You can’t make another respond in kind, but you can pave the way and most of the time you create an atmosphere that makes it easier for others to do likewise” -Lori Byerly. “The praise that comes from love does not make us vain, but more humble.” -James M. Barrie (From The-generous-wife.com article, “The Gift of Bragging)

“Learning to communicate in marriage isn’t solved by applying a magic potion— it’s a path of discovery. We individually bring into our married lives, different temperaments and various styles of communicating (and not communicating). Some are learned from our past backgrounds and experiences, and some we learned on our own. What’s important, as you enter into marriage, is that you learn how to communicate as a ‘couple.'” (From: Helping The “Help Meet” 4 The Christian Wife)

“In many cases, heavy debt causes a marriage to fall apart. Years ago, I mentored a married man who was carrying a HUGE credit-card debt. He asked what to do about it. I responded, “The same way you’d eat an elephant —one bite at a time. But to keep the elephant from growing, set all your cards on a cookie sheet in an oven and melt them down.” Easy credit is not just a mammoth monster. It’s a marriage eater.” (Excerpted from the book, “Moments With You” by Dennis and Barbara Rainey) 

“You’ve heard it said that 1 negative statement carries the same emotional weight as 7 positive ones. Whether the number is true or not, you can shift the atmosphere in your marriage with your words. Your words have the power to bring life and light into dark circumstances. What you say can create forward momentum in your marriage. Make it a habit to speak 10 positive, affirming and kind statements for every negative 1.” (Scott, gleaned from the Surrenderedmarriage.org article, “Power of Positive Speaking)

“There are limits to what we can do in different seasons of life, but take a look at how YOU look in general. What changes do you need to make? It’s important to dress in ways that are comfortable, but it’s not bad to keep your spouse in mind (he [she] does have to look at you and it’s nice to see a smile on his [her] face)” -LB. “How beautiful you are and how pleasing, my love, with your delights!” -Song of Songs 7:6 (Lori Byerly, gleaned from The-generous-wife.com article, “Toss That Shirt”)

“Be a life-giver when it comes to how you speak to your spouse: Pray for wisdom and revelation of what heaven is saying about your spouse, about your circumstances and about your marriage. Agree with that. Out loud. And be A Treasure Hunter  —We generally don’t have to work very hard to find negative stuff, but that isn’t what we want to agree with. Look for the good stuff, and amplify that with your words.” -Scott (Gleaned from the Surrenderedmarriage.org article, “Power of Your Words)

“If your marriage has grown stale, look in the mirror and ask God how He can use it to transform the person looking back at you. If you have let bitterness seize your heart, stop praying for your spouse to change and ask God to change you. Most marriages can survive temporarily “falling out of love.” But you’re headed for disaster if you ever let yourself fall out of repentance.” -Gary Thomas (Ncfliving.org article, “Transforming the Miracle of Marriage”)

“Flirting [with your spouse] is great for your marriage. Think about it: each of you put a tremendous amount of time and energy in dating, flirting and winning over your future mate.” But many married couples stop. However, “our culture is flirting with him/her in a variety of ways —music, TV, movies, and pornography. How much time to you put into flirting? Actively flirt with your spouse. Do it often. Do it daily.” (Gleaned from the Donotdisturbblog.wordpress.com web site)

“Keep the big picture perspective. One woman described her 65-year marriage. She shared that about 7 years throughout the 65-year span were really bad. But in the end she asked herself the question, ‘Would you really want to trade 58 good years for 7 bad years?’ The answer was a resounding NO! All marriages experience trials and tough moments. Don’t trade years of history for a couple of bad months or tough years.” (Julie Baumgardner, from Marriagemissions.com article, “Marriage Message #199 – Till Death Do Us Part.”)

“Our lives are made up of choices—forks in the road where we choose God’s way or pursue our own. When you don’t feel like loving your spouse, obey God. When you’re tempted to compromise your integrity, obey God. When passions tell you to give in, obey God. Whatever choice you may be facing, obey God! Thomas Carlisle wrote, ‘Conviction, be it ever so excellent, is worthless until it converts itself into conduct.’” (Excerpted from the book, “Moments With You” by Dennis and Barbara Rainey)

“Do you remember the time when you said “…to have and to hold …’til death do us part”? At the beginning of your marriage you committed to hold each other’s hopes and dreams. You are your spouse’s greatest asset when it comes to fulfilling their hopes for life. You are the one who can most effectively assuage their fears, most excitedly cheerlead their efforts and most exuberantly celebrate their successes.” (from Couplethingsblog.wordpress.com article, “Holding Hopes”)

“Anniversaries give us a chance, once a year, to take stock of where we’ve been, how we’ve gotten to this point and where we’re headed as a couple in our long-term future together. Proverbs 24:3-4 says: “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare & beautiful treasures.” Is your marriage wisely built with treasures of understanding and knowledge? (Drs Les and Leslie Parrott, in the Todayschristianwoman.com article, “Why We Need Anniversaries”)

“If you don’t feel the love you once had for your spouse, go back to treating them the way you did at 1st: Plan a romantic date they’d enjoy -Go out of your way to bless them in a meaningful way -Listen to your spouse with eye contact. No distractions -Pray for them -Do something for them so they don’t have to, like the dishes or wash the car -Call during the day just to say you miss them.” -DW. It can rebuild love. (Debi Walter, from Theromanticvineyard.com article, “Lost That Loving Feeling”)

“God is available for marriage counseling, but his counsel is strong and straightforward. While he cares about our feelings, he teaches us to subject them to Him for correction. He knows human feelings are fickle. He comforts us in our suffering while we squirm in our circumstances. He tells us what’s right and wrong, what we ought to do and not to do and leaves the choice to us.” He is God, our “Wonderful Counselor.(Sherry Van Zante, from the Todayschristianwoman.com article, “God’s Perfect Marriage Counseling”)

“Encouragement is more than just ‘rah -rah.’ Encouragement is literally ‘adding courage’ into your spouse. It’s an activity that is future-focused, positive-focused, and possibility-focused. Encouragement adds to a relationship. Do you encourage your spouse each day?” -Encourageyourspouse.com. If not, start today. “Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up…” -1 Thessalonians 5:11

The Bible tells us to “forgive as you have been forgiven.” But if we forgive our spouse for hurting us, doesn’t that give them a ‘free pass’ on what they did? Know that “Your forgiveness does not ‘let your spouse off the hook.’ He/She still has to give an account to God. Forgiveness frees you. When you forgive your spouse, you empower yourself to be the master of your emotions instead of a servant to them.” (From Marriageworks.com)

In your marriage —do your actions and words show you are a companion or a foe to your spouse? “The truth is when we said, I Do, God determined we would be life-long companions. This means we do everything we can to support them, hold them, help them bear fruit for God’s kingdom as well as their careers, and live alongside them giving and receiving unselfishly, without grumbling. Are you a companion or a foe?” (Debi Walter, from Theromanticvineyard.com article, “Companion or Foe?”)

“You may come from a broken home or never experienced positive marriage mentors growing up. You were taught knock down, drag out fights were normal and need to teach yourself to think differently. When you do think of the blessing you’ll be to so many others as they watch your marriage, as they look at the patience you have with your spouse. You’ll be a mentor without even trying; just by putting your marriage 1st.”  (Fawn Weaver, from Happywivesclub.com article, “Joy on the Inside”)

“If you’re locked in a power struggle with your mate, step back, take a breath and consider solving the problem together. Let go of your anger and realize that ‘a house divided against itself cannot stand.‘ (Matthew 12:25) Relax, remembering the good traits of your mate and work together in solving your marital problems.” D. Hawkins. “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” -Romans 12:18 (Quote by David B. Hawkins)

Apply yourself to learning all you can about marriage. Keep in mind that you can have the best tools at your fingertips, but if you don’t pick them up and use them, they won’t help you. And that goes for marriage advice. Keep an open mind when you read and look at the possibility. Perhaps all of the advice you find isn’t something you can use, but lean into discerning what may have possibilities. You may be surprised. (Cindy Wright, of Marriage Missions International)

“Press into a deeper understanding of the grace that you’ve been shown by God in Christ. Apprehending God’s grace will empower you show grace to your spouse. Get it in your heart and mind the extent to which grace is about intimacy and relationship. Let that knowledge fuel the response you have to your spouse in the face of his or her failings or shortcomings. Allow grace to work its way into your marriage.” -Scott Means (Scott Means, gleaned from the Surrenderedmarriage.org article, “A Grace-full Marriage”) 

“Speak well of your spouse. Speaking well of your spouse enables your spouse to trust you completely and it is such an important part of communication. When it comes to the way you speak about your spouse in front of others remember that it affects their perception of you, your spouse and the institution of marriage as a whole. So, continue to work on this and reap the benefits of your work.” -Jay Hafling (from the Donotdisturbblog.wordpress.com article, “Curb Appeal: 5 Ways to Make Your Marriage Attractive”)

“In studies of 700 miserable, ready-to-split spouses, researchers found that two thirds of those who stayed married were happy five years later. They toughed out some of the most difficult problems a couple could face… What was their strategy? A mix of stubborn commitment, a willingness to work together on issues, and a healthy lowering of expectations.” -Featured in Prevention Magazine

“When you look at your marriage, what do you feel ‘good’ and ‘bad’ about? Would getting ‘better’ at what you feel ‘bad’ about make it easier and nicer for you? For your spouse? What would it take to get ‘better’? What would you have to learn? What would you have to practice? Talk to your spouse about these questions. How do you practically work on something that’s difficult in your marriage and turn it into a success?” (Lori Byerly, gleaned from The-generous-wife.com article, “What Would It Take?”)

“Take a moment as you sit at your computer or look at your phone and pray for the marriages represented. Please pray for the coming stresses of the holidays and for couples separated by difficulties, military duty or business. Pray for [those] married to unbelievers and for those couples struggling with financial issues. Pray for better intimacy, couple time and any kind of blessing you can think of. Yeah, God!” (Lori Byerly, from The-generous-wife.com article, “Don’t Put This Off!”)

Love… rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” -1 Corinthians 13:6. “The fact is that what you say out loud has power to create —When you speak truth into the life of your spouse, you can help to call forth the things which are not yet, but which can be. God created the universe not by thinking or imagining it, but by speaking it into being.” -Scott  (Quote gleaned from the Surrenderedmarriage.org article, “Power of Your Words)

“Offer your spouse appreciation and praise. Everyone has a deep hunger for appreciation, including your spouse, so offer it freely. Don’t make your spouse beg for your gratitude and admiration. Give it willingly. Find something that you can praise him/her for and see what a difference it makes in your marriage.” -K. B. “Encourage one another daily, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.” -Hebrews 3:13

“Marriage doesn’t exist so that we can get either our practical or passionate needs met. Instead, God wants us to 1st come to Him to get our deepest needs met. Our needs for security, for meaning and for love. Once He fills us, we can turn to our spouses looking to fill their lives. God wants us to live out, with our spouses, the same kind of love He has for us! It involves daily work, effort and purposefulness.” (Sheila Wray Gregoire, from the Tolovehonorandvacuum.com article, “Do You Have a Mixed up Marriage Message?”)

In your marriage, remember: “Technology is a tool. Use it wisely and wisely set it down when you need to. It’s a form of ‘busy.’ Most of us could stand to simplify. So turn off your phones during dinner, limit TV time to certain hours and let Facebook be the occasional connection with friends. Look also for activities that don’t require electricity ~board games, bedroom time, or an evening stroll with your sweetie.” -LB (Lori Byerly, from The-generous-wife.com blog, “Lights out”)

“Marriage is not a private experiment, littered with prenuptial agreements and an attitude of ‘Try me! If it doesn’t work, you can always bail out!’ Marriage isn’t a of social contract —something you ‘do’ for as long as you both shall ‘love.’ Marriage is a sacred covenant between 1 man and 1 woman and their God for a lifetime. It’s a public vow of how you will relate to your spouse as you form a new family unit.” -D Rainey (Dennis Rainey, from the book, “One Home at a Time”)

“’Flee fornication.‘ (I Corinthians 6:18) Don’t argue with it, reason with it, discuss its ramifications with the object of your delight, and don’t underestimate it. Get away, quick. Don’t toy with temptation. Don’t dream about it, fantasize about it, and give in to its delights through your reading and TV/movie-watching. All of that dismantles one brick at a time the defenses you have built up against such grievous sins.” (Joe McKeever from Crosswalk.com article, “If it Can Happen to General Petraeus, it Can Happen to You”)

“If you’re walking through a hard time in your marriage, surround yourself with true friends. Our tendency, when we’re hurting, is to look for someone who will empathize with us. But ultimately that may make you feel temporarily better, but it doesn’t solve the problem. Find someone who will ask, ‘what Scriptures are you standing on?’ ‘What have you done to make this better?’ ‘What else do you think you could do?’” (Sheila Wray Gregoire, from the Tolovehonorandvacuum.com article, “The Right Attitude for Improving a Marriage”)

“Romance is not the foundation of a marriage. It’s the fire in the fireplace—the warmth and security of a relationship that says, ‘We may have struggles, but I love you and everything is okay.’ We ought to make romance a part of our everyday diet in our marriage relationship …Take the time to plan creative romance. Do something different, out of the ordinary, something that will capture your spouse’s attention.” (Dennis Rainey, Excerpted from Simply Romantic® Nights: Igniting Passion in Your Marriage -Volume 1)

Familylife.com tip: “Love the one you’re with. Boundaries like these establish strong family values. When you’re with someone, that relationship is your priority. Retraining takes time if you and your spouse are addicted to your devices. But keeping them in their rightful place, ‘opens up the door to more intimate communication.’ Life is too short. Let’s not invest what little time we have in meaningless endeavors.” (Dave Boehi, from the article, “Setting Boundaries for Mobile Technology”)

Make sure your attitude towards your spouse is “catchy” and reflects the love of Christ. “Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus…” (Philippians 2:5) “Your attitude affects the attitudes of those around you. So, why not start your day with a smile, an attitude of gratefulness, or a patient word? Let your attitude ripple out to others (especially your sweetie).” (Lori Byerly of The-generous-wife.com)

“Invest time into your marriage relationship. Make it a high priority to spend quality time together often. But also give each other the freedom to spend time apart when either one of you wants solitude, so you don’t become irritated with each other. Engage in good conversations often, and turn off your electronic devices when you do, so you won’t be distracted while talking and listening to each other.” (Whitney Hopler, from the Crosswalk.com article, “How to Build a Strong Marriage in the Real World”)

If you have children, it’s important to work together so you are able to: “get on the same parenting page. Your kids know they can divide and conquer. When they succeed, your home is anything but peaceful. Recognize that you and your [spouse] are not supposed to be on opposite teams with different parenting philosophies. You’ve got to get on the same team so you can be a united front to your children.” (Arlene Pellicane, Crosswalk.com article, Top Ten Ways to Make Your Husband Happy)

“You don’t have to get angry just because your mate is angry. James 1:19 gives us sage advice —Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. Too often we behave in the exact opposite manner, disobedient to this Scripture. We’re quick to anger, quick to speak and slow to listen. How’s that workin’ for you? It doesn’t work, does it? So isn’t it time we started trying James’ advice?” (Harold and Bette Gillogly, from November 2012 newsletter sent from Marriages.net)

“Marriage is not a private experiment, littered with prenuptial agreements and an attitude of ‘Try me! If it doesn’t work, you can always bail out!’ Marriage isn’t a of social contract—something you ‘do’ for as long as you both shall ‘love.’ Marriage is a sacred covenant between 1 man and 1 woman and their God for a lifetime. It’s a public vow of how you will relate to your spouse as you form a new family unit.” -Dennis Rainey

Concerning your marriage: “If you’re going to fight the good fight of faith to the finish, you’ll have to do just like Joshua did. You’ll have to continually draw courage from the Word of God. So make up your mind to do it. Get into that Word and let it change you from a coward to an over-comer. Then march into battle and slay the giants in your land.” -A Pastor

“‘Don’t invite negative thoughts to dinner or they will eventually get fat.’ When negative thoughts cross our mind, we must let them pass through. Don’t entertain them. Don’t feed them. Let them grab some water & be on their way. Keep your mind and thoughts positive and your life will follow suit.” -Advice from the Happy Wives Club. “We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” -2 Corinthians 10:5

“Speak kindly. If someone were to repeat all the things you say to your [spouse], would it be ‘news that’s fit to print?’ Are you heaping on praise and encouragement, or criticism and sarcasm?” Are you a dispenser of grace or someone who readily shoots out criticism? Don’t trash what your spouse does, either to his/her face or behind his/her back. “Your words matter more to [your spouse] than anyone else’s.” (Quotes from Arlene Pellicane, Crosswalk.com article, Top Ten Ways to Make Your Husband Happy)

“Just as Jesus came to destroy the dividing line between Jew and Gentile, He also comes into our marriages today, offering us the tools required to dismantle the walls that can so quickly grow up between us. He offers the tools of forgiveness, honor, grace and repentance. It may take a lot of work and selflessness to get the walls down, but keep going through your house [marriage] until you’ve torn them to the ground.” (Excerpted from, “Moments With You” by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.)

A mistake in marriage: “In the hustle and bustle of life, it’s so easy to get caught up with our own interests and challenges and to ignore those of our spouse. This is a common, yet destructive mistake! Learn to be a champion of your spouse. Make it a priority to demonstrate interest, to listen, and display empathy. Dr. David Hawkins says, ‘If you don’t make your mate feel very special, somebody else will!'” -Jim Burns (Gleaned from Growthtrac article, “Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage”)

“If you have been together very long, you know how to push her buttons. At least, you know how to push the ones that get her [him] upset –but what about those that make her [him] feel good, loved, relaxed or secure? Work on building up a number of ‘bless her’ [or ‘bless him’] buttons. Refine those you know, and look for new ones. Then push those buttons frequently!” -Paul Byerly, from The-generous-husband.com

“Marriage takes work, good communication, lots of grace and outside support. If we claim that there are no problems, then others are unable to relate to us or they may feel isolated and alone with their struggles. However, when sharing with others about struggles don’t share about your spouses struggles but about your own. There’s a big difference between blaming your spouse for your issues and owning up to your own junk.” (Jay Hafling from the Donotdisturbblog.wordpress.com article, “Curb Appeal: 5 Ways to Make Your Marriage Attractive”)

“Marriage is hard work. And many people are making it more difficult by overlooking the fundamental truth that marriage is a spiritual institution designed by God for two imperfect people to be joined together in their dependence upon Him and each other. If each of you wants to be “one who walks in wisdom” (Proverbs 28:26), you cannot ignore His instructions [the Bible] on how you build and maintain a spiritual union.” (Excerpted from Moments With You by Dennis and Barbara Rainey)

“Understanding that we don’t have it all together is a step in the right direction. But if we fail to understand how to move forward and work on our marriages then we’re no better off. Maybe there’s a couple in your life that you respect and admire. Ask them how they make it work. Then think of ways you can learn and adapt what helps them into your own marriage. Then think of others you can be a positive influence on.” (Jay Hafling from the Donotdisturbblog.wordpress.com article, “Curb Appeal: 5 Ways to Make Your Marriage Attractive”)

“Common courtesy plays a big role in happy marriages. People who are permanently married are polite to one another. They don’t want to hurt one another’s feelings and they don’t try to make the other one feel humiliated. People who are married for life are extremely kind to one another” -F Pittman. “As God’s chosen people… clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience” -Colossians 3:12. (Quote by Frank Pittman)

“The most attitude-altering instruction we received as a newlywed couple came from Archie and Margaret Boone. They told us, ‘Make your home look like a wagon wheel. Put Christ at the hub. Make Him the center of your lives. Then, as you follow the line of the spokes, notice that as they get closer to the hub, they grow closer to one another. This will work for you even if you’re opposites in personality!'” (Steve and Annie Chapman, gleaned from the Crosswalk.com article, “I Need a Teammate, Not a Cell Mate”)

“The other day I was watching a couple talk. They were constantly interrupting each other. Neither of them felt heard and as a result neither was willing to listen. It was a sad cycle. The moral of this story is that, in difficult situations, someone has to start listening. …Practice the skill of listening, perhaps ask a few questions. Listening deeply says you care and you want to hear his (or her) heart.” (Lori Byerly, from the blog, “Listening Is a Good Start”)

“You’ve probably read Philippians 4:8 several times or even memorized it, but have you ever directly applied it to your spouse? ‘Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.’” (Linda Dillow) May the mind of Christ be within you!

How’s your attitude? “Now is the time to replace the negative with the positive. Are you ready to replace the wrong with the right, to move gratitude into the house where griping has lived? God wants you to build a house of gratitude.” (Linda Dillow) “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.” (Proverbs 24:3-4)

During this Christmas season (and throughout the year): “Reaffirm your allegiance to your spouse, both verbally and in action. If you have been putting your parent’s feelings ahead of your spouse’s (e.g. in making holiday plans or deciding where you will spend your vacation) Stop! Make your plans together as a couple, putting your family’s needs first.” (Richard Exley) You’re married to your spouse, not your parents. (Quote from book, “Forever in Love”)

“Suffering often drives couples apart. It’s easier to stay a few extra hours at work than come home to a house in chaos, a house filled with pain. It’s easier to check out emotionally than to talk to one another about what you’re facing. But, just as Emmanuel —the God with us models, we’re called to be present to and for one another.” J.A.C. “Carry each other’s burdens and you will fulfill the law of Christ.” -Gal. 6:2 (Jerusha Ann Clark, from the Todayschristianwoman.com article, “Suffering Together”)

“As spouses we need to give prayer, encouragement and grace to our mate when he/she makes a mistake. For some reason it’s easier for us to be nicer to folks outside our house. Let’s aim to respond in kindness, love, patience, mercy, prayer, and grace the next time our spouse messes up. Let’s look for the good our spouse brought to us in the past and encourage him/her to stand up, dust off, and keep moving forward in Christ.” (Kevin Bullard, gleaned from Mymarriageworks.org article “Respond Like this When Your Spouse Messes Up”)

In marriage: “Setting aside time with God can give us a new perspective. By realizing only God can meet our deepest needs, we cultivate more realistic expectations of each other. …It’s easy to fall into the mindset that everything is about us —our time, our relationship, and our desires. While God delights when we prioritize time together, he also knows that our marriage will be that much richer if we seek him daily.” (Susy Yates Anderson, from the Todayschristianwoman.com article “Spiritually Lacking”)

“Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as opening our hearts.” -Janice Maeditere “May the Lord direct your heart into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance.” (2 Thessalonians 3:5) And may your Christmas be blessed with your spouse and all who comes into your life during this wonderful season of celebration! -Steve and Cindy Wright (Marriage Missions International)

“There is a question we ask each other when a special time or vacation has come to an end. It is this, ‘What was your favorite part of our time together?’ Knowing we’re going to ask ourselves this question at the end of the week helps us notice those moments as they’re happening. Try it the next time you’re planning something special and see if you don’t have more to be grateful for as the time comes to an end.” (Debi Walter, from Theromanticvineyard.com article, “Now That’s a Great Question”) 

“Too often we focus on all the things about our spouses that we don’t like and wish we could change. You know what it is like to be married to your mate, but how often do you think about what it is like for him/her to be married to you? If you woke up tomorrow and discovered you were married to you, would you be delighted? Or would you be devastated?” (Linda Dillow from the book, What’s it Like to Be Married to Me?)

In a growth-focused marriage: “Couples really believe ‘God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose‘ for them (Romans 8:28). Good marriages don’t just ‘happen.’ While couples don’t ignore problems, they choose to look beyond solving the immediate problem to the ways God might help them ‘become like his Son’ (Romans 8:29).” (Gary and Carrie Oliver from their Todayschristianwoman.com article, “Ready, Set, Grow.”)

Strengthen what remains” -Revelation 3:2. “Perhaps this is the encouragement you need to keep moving forward in your marriage with a spouse who has shown contrition and is begging you for another chance. Are things perfect? No. Can you undo the past? No. However, you can build on broken pieces and trust God to give you beauty for your marital ashes. If you’re willing, God will help you build on broken pieces.” (Kevin Bullard, from Marriageworks.org article, “Building on Broken Pieces”)

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” -Eph. 4:2-3. “Are you practicing humility, gentleness and patience with your spouse? Is there a place where you could stand to ‘swallow your pride’ to restore unity in your marriage? Are you giving your spouse enough time and understanding or expecting instant change?” (From the Makinginthemicrowave.com article, “Monday Marriage Devotional: Ephesians 4:2-3)

“Every one of us has a choice. In each circumstance we can choose whether we’re going to consider each others’ feelings or win at all costs” -C Swalwell. Carefully make your choice. God’s word tells: “Encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing” -I Thess. 5:11. “Do nothing out of selfish” ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” -Phil. 2:3 (Cheri Swalwell, from Crosswalk.com article, “What’s More Important -Feelings or Fighting?”)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! As you travel your marital journey this year, remember: “A man’s unconditional love for his wife reveals his love for Christ… A wife’s unconditional respect for her husband reveals her reverence for Christ… In the ultimate sense, your marriage has nothing to do with your spouse. It has everything to do with your relationship to Jesus Christ.” -Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (Quote based on Ephesians 5)

“Knowing why we are married and should stay married is crucial. The key question is: Will we approach marriage from a God-centered view or a man-centered view? In a man-centered view, we will maintain our marriage as long as our earthly comforts, desires, and expectations are met. In a God-centered view, we preserve our marriage because it brings glory to God and points a sinful world to a reconciling Creator.” (Gary Thomas, from the book, The Sacred Marriage)

“Marriage is not simply the luck of the draw, or something that we get involved in which just unfolds before us like a long movie. Good marriages, like good individual lives or good art, are conscious creations. They are made.” (Kevin and Marilyn Ryan) “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.(Proverbs 24:3-4)

“In marriage, when we’re not wise to keep watch over our attitudes, actions, and our communication with our spouses, we set off explosions, so to speak. When harsh words and judgments are carelessly thrown about, they cause devastation. …Develop the skills of self-discipline, of knowing when to take a time-out, and of recognizing when you’re feeling defensive, to keep yourself from exploding on your spouse.” -Jim Burns (Jim Burns, gleaned from Growthtrac article, “Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage”) 

“Bottom line: Do not wait for your spouse to join in to help ‘fix’ your marriage. Even though your marriage feels hopeless to you, it is not hopeless to God! It takes God and one willing heart. I have seen hundreds of marriages come back together, even after one of the spouses has given up.” -Emerson Eggerichs

In marriage, “we’re called to mutually give to one another. The Apostle Paul says we’re to ‘submit to one another out of reverence for Christ‘ (Eph. 5:21). He further elaborates his message in the Love Chapter of the Bible, 1 Corinthians 13, where he says we’re to sacrificially give to our mate. We’re called to NOT focus on wrongs done by our mate, but to delight in each other” -Dr David Hawkins. Do you? How? (Quote from Crosswalk.com article, “Low-Grade Marriage Headache”)

“An enduring marriage requires possibility thinking, elasticity, and resilience. It needs continual attention and adaptation. It requires a shift in interest as our partner’s interest’s shift. Marriage, to remain good, involves a lifelong project of adjusting and readjusting our attitudes. For this is the only path to finding positive options to our most perplexing circumstances.” -Drs Les and Leslie Parrott (from the book, “When Bad Things Happen to Good Marriages”)

“Many marriages are on the rocks because couples have drifted apart and have little or no sense of connection and intimacy. Learn to be intentional in seeking ongoing connection and attachment with your spouse. Be proactive in this area. You can’t expect to change your spouse, but you can actively work on creating affectionate, warm, and encouraging environments in your home, which can have a huge influence on him or her.” (Jim Burns, gleaned from Growthtrac article, “Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage”)

“As in our garden, so, too, in our marriages. There are weeds that threaten a marriage garden. If you’ve been ignoring a taking-my-spouse-for-granted weed, pull it up now and fill the gaping hole with flowers of appreciation or thoughtful words of gratitude. If you’re stuck for words, close your eyes and imagine what you would have said in your courting days. Digging deep into that well will bring up sweet water.” (Alistair Begg, gleaned from the Familylife.com article, “3 Weeds to Pull From Your Marriage Garden”)

“Set up a ‘reading date.’ Take turns reading things you find interesting to each other. It might be a favorite scripture or quote. Perhaps share a passage from a favorite novel or a bit from a news article. Share why it’s special or of interest to you and share your thoughts about it” -Lori Byerly, from The-generous-wife.com. This concept also works for talking about a movie or a TV program and is a great 22-minute date.

2 Corinthians 1:7: “…knowing that as you are sharers of our sufferings, so also you are sharers of our comfort.” “The context of this verse describes a ministry partnership relationship, but doesn’t it also well describe how our marriages should work? We ought to experience each others sufferings, but also share our comforts as we make this faith journey together.” -April Motl (From Crosswalk.com article, “Making Your Marriage a Safe Place”)

“When married life begins to feel like a war —and it will, will you war against each other or will you war together? Life can be intense —lost jobs, lost loved ones, and lost hope. So when the bullets start flying, will you hunker down in the bunker together? When everything begins to war against your marriage, will the two of you fight for each other or will you fight against?” -Paul Angone (Loveandrespectnow.com)

“The Puritans called marriage ‘the little church within the church.’ In marriage, every day you love, and every day you are to forgive. It’s an ongoing sacrament—love and forgiveness.” (Bill Moyers) “Be imitators of God, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” (Eph. 5:1-2) “Forgive as you have been forgiven.” (Eph. 4:32)

“We need to have a healthy sense of who we are and of who our spouse is. Don’t make the mistake of trying to mold your spouse into your own vision of who you wish he or she should be. Don’t jump to assumptions about what your spouse is thinking. Demonstrate healthy boundaries by being respectful of who your spouse is and of what he or she thinks.” -Jim Burns (Gleaned from Growthtrac article, “Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage”)

“Put disciplined hedges around your life. Refrain from verbal intimacy with women [or men] other than your spouse. Do not bare your heart to another, or pour forth your troubles to her [or him]. Intimacy is a great need in most people’s livers —and talking about personal matters, especially one’s problems, can fill another’s need of intimacy, awakening a desire for more. Many affairs begin this way.” -R. Kent Hughes

“Some husbands and wives resort to shame-based communication with their spouse, using a parental-style tone, that’s critical & belittling. This triggers defensiveness on the part of the receiving spouse, which usually results in angry and escalating retorts, or withdrawal from communication. Do your marriage a favor and avoid lecturing language such as, ‘I can’t believe you…,’ ‘You always…,’ ‘You never…,’ ‘How come you…'” (Jim Burns, gleaned from Growthtrac article, “Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage”)

“I sat in a theater with a friend who had succumbed to sexual temptation. She lost her husband, her family and many ‘friends.’ The film showed a woman contemplating an affair. ‘Don’t do it!’ she cried. Martha was living the devastation of yielding to sexual temptation and her audible cry was the overflow of her pain-filled heart. Can I shout with Martha? ‘Don’t do it!’ -S.J. “Flee from sexual temptation…” -1 Cor. 6:18 (Sharon Jaynes, gleaned from Growthtrac.com article, “Sexual Temptation”)

Wisdom for the weekend, which hopefully will inspire you to do the same: “I am going to try to let my love and reverence for Christ spill over onto my spouse. If I love Christ, I should come across more lovingly to my spouse. If I reverence Christ, I should come across more respectfully to my spouse.” ~Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

Don’t assume and don’t take for granted that you know all about your spouse. “Learn what’s important to your spouse. Are you slaving over trying to cook gourmet or exotic food when your spouse would be completely satisfied with PB&J? Are you bending over backwards to buy a gift when a simple card and setting aside some time would make them feel more loved and appreciated? Learn about your spouse and how they feel loved.” (Megan of Do Not Disturb, guest posting on The-generous-wife.com article, “Money, Marriage and Making it Work”)

“When you choose to bless your husband or wife in face of their shortcomings, it speaks loudly to their heart that they are loved and accepted. In a healthy relationship, their natural response will be to want to bless you back. Then you have the opportunity to tell them what that looks like to you, giving you an invitation to address, in a loving way, whatever the issue or concern is. Show grace, true grace.” -S Means (Scott Means, from the Surrenderedmarriage.org article, “A Grace-full Marriage”)

For a healthy marriage, “when something bothers you, decide if it bothers you enough that you should say something. Also try to look at how often you’re expressing such displeasure. If it’s several times a day, you may need to change. You might ask yourself if it should bother you. Is the reason it bothers you buried in your past and can you do something about that? Are you just too picky and you should change that?” (Paul Byerly, gleaned from The-generous-husband.com article, “Can You Let it Slide?”)

Consider your vows and how you speak to your spouse. “Nothing is easier than saying words. Nothing is harder than living them, day after day. What you promise today must be renewed and re-decided tomorrow and each day that stretches out before you.” (Arthur Gordon) “Be the living expression of God’s kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.” (Mother Teresa)

“Resist the urge to speak in anger. Yelling usually results in angry responses and induces a cycle of escalating conflict. This isn’t to say that you can’t or shouldn’t speak the truth or share your feelings, but learn to speak with grace and love. Own your actions and take responsibility for how you respond. Watch yourself and employ the skills of self-discipline, taking a healthy time-out” [when it’s best to do so]. (Jim Burns, gleaned from Growthtrac article, “Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage”)

“It’s easy to let your lives become dominated by TV. Little by little, without even realizing it, you begin the process of shutting each other out of your lives, while giving hour upon hour to the make-believe world of TV. Talk about your TV habits. Is turning it on just a natural reflex now? Does it have too much of you?” “All things are lawful for me… but I will not be mastered by anything.” 1 Cor. 6:12 (Quote is excerpted from Moments With You by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.)

“Pray for wise speech for your husband. Pray that he would know what to say and when, and that he would know when it’s wise to be silent. ‘Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles.‘ -Proverbs 21:23 (Lori Byerly from The-generouswife.com) The same goes for a husband, to pray for his wife, that she would set a guard over her mouth to keep her soul from being troubled and so she doesn’t hurt others.

In your marriage: “When choosing what kind of people to allow into your lives, consider whether or not they’re living lives that you want to emulate, whether or not their marriages are marked by love and respect and whether or not they influence your own marriage for good. Surround yourselves with people you admire and who are committed to encouraging and supporting you and your spouse in your marriage.” (Quote from: Whitney Hopler, from the Crosswalk.com article, “How to Enjoy a Lifelong Love Affair with Your Spouse”)

“Sometimes we avoid change, thinking that the pain of correcting behavior is going to be so great that we settle for discomfort that we already know. Often, nothing changes until the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of changing. Don’t put off change if you’ve been making mistakes. It might be painful, but preserving your marriage and taking it to a better place, is well worth the pain and effort! (Jim Burns, gleaned from Growthtrac article, “Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage”) 

“CHARACTER CHECK: There are lots of ways to be deceitful in marriage. We call it being less than truthful, but it’s just another way of saying we’re lying, manipulating, controlling. Is that person you?” (From devotional, “Women of Character) “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death” Proverbs 14:12. Are you living in Truth —honoring the vows you gave to your spouse AND to God?

In marriage: “Change your view of failure. While the dream might have started that it would remain perfect, no marriage is exempt from experiencing problems. Maybe you said or did something stupid. Maybe you failed to deliver on a promise or commitment. Life happens. Now you have a choice. Dwell on failure OR change your view of it. What can you learn from this? What would you do differently next time?” (Robert Ferguson, gleaned from Fergusonvalues.com article, “5 Ways to Improve Your knowledge of Marriage”)

BE AWARE: “When a wife feels unloved, it can be such a shock to her heart that she is oblivious to her disrespectful reactions towards her husband, though another man [or woman] watching could see it plainly. When a husband feels disrespected, it can provoke him so quickly he doesn’t see his unloving reaction, which would be obvious to another woman [or man].” -Emerson Eggerichs of Loveandrespect.com

“The ever-increasing percentages of failed marriages should indicate that secular society’s approach to marriage, with its lack of absolutes, isn’t working. A number of movies and TV shows have challenged the institution of marriage under the disguise of humor. It’s important that we learn the times in which we’re living so we avoid its temptations and challenge its proud assertions.” -A.B. Let the Bible be your guide. (Alistair Begg, gleaned from the Familylife.com article, “3 Weeds to Pull From Your Marriage Garden”)

“Put Christ 1st in all things. When Barbara and I signed the ‘Title Deed’ of our lives over to Christ as a young married couple, we gave Him everything that was ours—all rights to our lives, dreams and possessions. Have we ever failed? Sure. But when we’ve been tempted to live for ourselves, we’ve been able to remember a time when we submitted everything of ours into His keeping and signed that title deed.” -Dennis Rainey (Excerpted from Moments With You by Dennis and Barbara Rainey) 

Married couples who are successful: “have marriages that last through all of life’s changes, because they continually learn to make sacrifices. They consistently give up to gain strength to move forward. They give up their egos, their pride, their need to be right, the need to win… In short, they sacrifice for God and that causes them to make sacrifices for each other —over and over again, situation after situation.” (Edward, from the Elevateyourmarriage.com article, “The #1 Factor for a Long, Healthy Marriage”) 

“It’s good to have expectations —to set the bar high —to be a person who knows what he/she wants. But your expectations are based on YOUR upbringing, YOUR experiences, YOUR personality, YOUR likes/dislikes. If we put expectations on our spouses that are not based on who THEY are, our marriage will eventually implode. We have to make room for flexibility and grace.” “Bear with one another…”  -Colossians 3:13 (Quote from Lori Byerly, from The-generous-wife.com article, “Let Him Out of the Box of Your Expectations”)

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