Valentines Day and Beyond in Marriage – MM #290

There’s a holiday here in the U.S. called Valentine’s Day. The tradition is to celebrate your love for one another at this special time of the year.

Of course, we think ANY reason and every day it’s possible to celebrate love (in a pure way) is a great idea! Sadly, we don’t focus on marital love enough —we often let life slide in between us and forget to laugh together and romance each other (as we did before we got married).

I overheard someone once say, “Marriage has robbed a lot of couples of their romance.” Sadly that’s true! But it doesn’t have to be —because each day can usher in a new beginning, when you purpose for it to do so. We challenge you TODAY to look for and find ways to make your spouse smile and feel better loved by you. And remember, whenever you give a gift:

“Real giving is when we give to our spouses what’s important to them, whether we understand it, like it, or not.” (Michele Weiner-Davis)

Valentines Day Romance

Below are a few ideas you could use for Valentines Day (or another day), which Sheldon Walker gave in an article published in The Globe and Mail.

The suggestion is for men to design “a coupon book that you can print off and staple together. These coupons may be cashed in on demand from your partner.” Of course the same idea could work for wives also, adapting the  ideas to please the husband. (If you need help, we have a whole topic of our web sit devoted to Romantic Ideas —both for men and women.)

But here are Sheldon’s suggestions for that coupon book:

• One half-hour of active listening about any topic the bearer chooses. This comes with a full guarantee that no advice will be offered.

• One half-hour discussion of the state of your [marital] union

• One half-hour of massage of any body part the bearer chooses.

• Or one lingering non-sexual hug.

• One bath with pre-lit candles surrounding the tub.

• One evening out alone with no home responsibilities.

• How about one video rental evening with a romantic movie featured?

• One half-hour talk where the bearer can give you feedback. (Do this gently, not with criticism, otherwise the coupon is invalid.)

• One evening out with the bearer having total control over the choice and nature of the activity.

• One gourmet meal prepared or ordered in by you.

• An instance when you will answer the question, “What are you thinking about right now?”

• One instance where you will openly answer the question, “What are you feeling right now?” Answers may only consist of emotions such as sadness, joy, anger, fear, depression, angst.

• One stroll or walk, holding hands or arm-in-arm.

• One trip in the car where you will slow down when asked.

• An evening at home with music and slow dancing.

— ALSO —

A few additional ideas, which you can use for Valentines Day, or another day of your choice, can be found at the following links:

• HOW TO MAKE IT A VALENTINE’S DAY HE WON’T FORGET

• 13 SEXY VALENTINE’S GIFTS FROM YOUR GROCERY STORE

• TAKE THE PRESSURE OFF THIS VALENTINE’S DAY

In closing, we’d like to share with you something sent to us by a friend from Zimbabwe. It’s based 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, which is:

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.“

May this be the prayer of your heart on Valentines Day and beyond:

Dear Lord,

Because love is patient:

Help me to be slow to judge, but quick to listen, hesitant to criticize, but eager to encourage, remembering your endless patience with me.

Because love is kind:

Help my words to be gentle and my actions to be thoughtful. Remind me to smile and to say “Please” and “Thank You” because those little things still mean so much.

Because love does not envy or boast, and it is not proud:

Help me have a heart that is humble and sees the good in others. May I celebrate and appreciate all that I have and all that I am, as well as doing the same for those around me.

Because love is not rude or self-seeking:

Help me to speak words that are easy on the ear and on the heart. When I’m tempted to get wrapped up in my own little world, remind me there’s a great big world out there full of needs and hurts.

Because love is not easily angered and keeps no record of wrongs:

Help me to forgive others as you have forgiven me. When I want to hold onto a grudge, gently help me release it so I can reach out with a hand of love instead.

Because love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth:

Help me stand up for what is right and good. May I defend the defenseless, and help the helpless. Show me how I can make a difference.

Because love always protects and always trusts:

Help me to be a refuge for those around me. When the world outside is harsh and cold, may my heart be a place of acceptance and warmth.

Finally, because love always perseveres:

Help my heart continually beat with love for You and others. AMEN.

We hope you’ll continually pray for each other. Also, keep romancing each other, and never stop showing your love and care. But make sure you do this throughout the year—not just on Valentine’s Day.

And may your love for the Lord compel you to reveal and reflect the Love of Christ every day in little and small ways within your marriage.

Cindy and Steve Wright

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