My wife and I have been married for 10 years, divorced for 1 year, and remarried for 4 years. This, of course, is to each other. Ours is a marriage that has been put back together after the divorce.
You may ask, how is it the second time around? It’s absolutely marvelous. We never argue, never say the wrong things to each other, and we are always happy. If only it were so! No, we do argue, and we do miscommunicate with each other. We are not always happy. But that’s all part of having a successful marriage.
First Marriage
In our first marriage God was not a part of it. I rejected God and was the most inconsiderate man that any woman could ever have been married to. I was an alcoholic and a drug addict. Eventually I became a gangster. My wife had to live ten years of absolute hell with me.
She, however, loved me. She told me continually that the reason she stayed with me was because she believed the man that she had met 10 years before would return. Despite all the ways I hurt my wife, she did not divorce me. I left her for a younger girl and divorced her.
It was my six year old daughter who was the one who helped to bring us back together. She had never been into a church, nor did she know much about spiritual things. But one day she found out from her teacher that she should pray for God to bring her daddy back. God answered her prayer.
Lastly, I want to say that if you are having marriage problems and want to get divorced, I don’t recommend it. I believe with God any marriage can be successful. To sum it all up, success in marriage depends how much you are prepared to sacrifice. My precious wife was prepared to sacrifice everything to keep our marriage together. I thank God for her.
This is a true testimony given to us from a subscriber from South Africa.
(NETHERLANDS) @ Lynne. My history before I begin. I was married for 7 years, not the greatest marriage, had some good times but the not so good overshadows all that, especially the last 2 years. My husband started going out every night, drinking, with a new set of friends. His business folded, we were evicted, he talked of divorce at least 3 times in those 2 years. We had no food, we were swimming in debt, 4 months back rent, a huge electricity bill, and he had a “girl-friend” supposedly not involved. Years of emotional abuse and constant rejection -I was not worldly enough. Thankfully, at the start of the 2 year mess, I turned straight to God, and for 2 years, I spent almost every day in scripture trying to learn how to be a woman after Gods heart. I stopped trying to please my husband (which obviously wasn’t working), and started trying to please my heavenly husband. He strengthened and blessed me in these times providing me food through a girl at work, transport to and from work, even though I lived out of the way. I surrendered totally to Him, I started keeping Sabbath according to scripture, Feasts /appointed times according to scripture …etc. It was when I returned from Feast of Tabernacles that my (now ex) wanted a divorce, and I had total peace that I could let go… I had tried everything to keep the marriage going, there was nothing else I could do. The Almighty had ended it. Since then I have continued to study on how to be a woman according to scripture and I have studied marriage and divorce in scripture. Why I’m telling you this…because you don’t need to go through all that. Since then (one and a half years later) God brought the most amazing man into my life, who is everything a husband should be, and everything I have wanted in a man according to scripture, and we both had confirmations that we where for each other.
If you are not married does your union matter? Were you both in covenant with our Creator? Were you equally yoked? What GOD has brought together let no man put asunder. From what I can see, your ex is not a believer, so these do not apply therefore, your union is no longer. From what I can see (and I’m assuming you are a believer) you are the one that was in disobedience when laying with this man. (Ezra 10:3-4…we have tresspassed against our Elohim (God), and have taken foreign women… Now then, let us make a covenant with our Elohim to put away all these wives…) They had married foreign wives who where not walking in the ways of our Creator. You made a mistake, and you have to pay for that mistake. You have a child that you will be bringing into this world… just to clarify… your child is not the mistake… and it’s up to you to repent, and return to the Father’s ways and to teach your son in the way to walk.
If your ex was not ready for a relationship, then he should never have started one with you… lame excuse. You “love him deeply” because you have entered into a “soul tie” and it’s harder to move on since you have his child now. With the help of prayer and cleaving to Our Creator, this can be broken. You now have a choice that can only better you life. You are not a door mat, you are worth more than you think… you are a daughter of the Most High, and you deserve only the best, the best that HE alone can give you.
Pray and ask him for a man who deserves you, He needs to pursue you, men are by nature… hunters. If a man loves you, he will bend over backwards for you… Love is about action and doing. Just like our creator… If we love Him… We KEEP HIS commandments (John 14:15; John 14:23; John 15:10; Rev 12:17; Rev 14:12) Actions speak louder than words!
A man is supposed to protect you and teach you in the ways of our Elohim. When Eve disobeyed, Adam was not protecting her, and God came looking for him not her as she was put into his care by God (Genesis 3:9)
This is what a husband & wife are supposed to be like -just Like Messiah and His Bride -changing “the assembly” to “His Bride”, read on: Eph 5:21 We are to subject ourselves to each other in the fear of Elohim (God). (22) Wives subject yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Master. (23) Because the husband is head of the wife, as also the Messiah is head of (His Bride), and He is Saviour of the body. (24) But as (His Bride) is subject to Messiah, so also let the wives be to their own husbands in every respect. (25) Husbands, love your wives, as Messiah also did love (His bride) and gave Himself for (her), (26) in order to set (her) apart and cleanse (her) with the washing of water by the Word, (27) in order to present (her) to Himself a splendid (Bride), not having spot or wrinkle or any of this sort, but that (she) may be set-apart and blameless. (28) In THIS way husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. (29) For no one ever hated his own flesh, but FEEDS and CHERISHES it, as also the Master does (His Bride)….(33) …let each one LOVE HIS WIFE as himself, and let the wife see that she FEARS (honours, respects) HER HUSBAND.
So…hang in there, and cleave to Your Father in Heaven… You have made a mistake, don’t make another one. Blessings & Shalom in Yeshua HaMashiach
(USA) I have been separated a 1 year and divorced for 2 years. I divorced my husband and I have a new found love for him. I do not know how or what to do to get him back. I pray every day… I divorced him or started the procedure in anticipation he would prove I was everything to him after God. However, he never stopped it.
We had a turbulent marriage- more so when he drank. I have learned to forgive me and will stand by him to kick his drinking ways. I know I love him for ever after. I wake up and thank God I ask for him, and before I go to bed he, my ex is the last person that enters my heart; my heart and my soul. I don’t know how to reach out to him and I am frightened that we may never have a second chance… What do I do?
(USA) Hopefully God will ‘restore’ him. The first question is… is he restoring you?
I am almost finally divorced. I thought I wanted a divorce but I was wrong. Now my soon to be ex-wife is with another man. I was with many other women over the years, not living in God’s word, though claiming I was a Christian. I have been learning, as I have a new found love for God again… something I never
really had.
If you are God centered, then all things can be done. You have to be prepared that you may NEVER get back with your husband. However, you can hope and pray daily that you do get back with him. The key is to refocus on God and make HIM the center of your world… then and only then can miracles happen. Many will laugh at you and mock you…. they did to me.
My wife is absolutely positive we will NEVER get back together. Normally that would’ve made me very upset, but tonight I realized that with God… I am ok no matter what happens. I still hope and pray for reconciliation but have prepared myself that it may NEVER happen.
Let go and let God. Trust in Him and you will accomplish all you can AND know that through these trials and tribulations that many better things are coming your way… and that could include a totally renewed love with your ex husband.
I used to believe that you can just move on and find someone else. That is our human nature and the Devil totally messing with you and God’s plan. Don’t listen to him… listen to HIM instead. I hope that helps.
(USA) I was a bad sinner for 3 years after we separated. Our marriage was never God centered. Our kids ruled our world and we fought all the time. We had amazing ‘intimacy’ and had fun… but we were almost never in sync.
After we split she occasionally tried to reunite but to no avail. I dated many other women and she always tried to reconcile when I was with someone. Once I was no longer with someone we would split again. I was no saint. She finally stopped trying and I continued in my life but became reunited with God.
By then she was done with me and moved on with someone else. We both say God is guiding us. I want to reconcile because of my re-found faith in the Lord and she says that she is happy with the way things are. One of us is wrong and I am still confused, because of emotions, to see which one of us is wrong. God can’t be telling us each something different in regards to the same relationship.
P.s. I am her second marriage and she was my first. I know all the passages about marriage/remarriage. What to do… oh, what to do.
(USA) What to do? Find information about the Covenant of Marriage:
http://www.marriagedivorce.com/mdreform2.htm
http://www.cadz.net/mdr.html
(MARYLAND) My Husband Andy has left me for another woman. She has been a problem in our relationship since the beginning. I need all the prayer that I can get because he says she makes him happy and gives him peace of mind. But he still communicates and sees me. I am at my wits end and running out of options. GOD please help me restore my marriage. I need everyone to pray for me as I will pray for you as well.
(EL SALVADOR) Please help me pray for my wifes salvation and the restoration of my marriage. I’m leaving it all in Gods hands; actually I left it in His hands about 2 months ago. I live in El Salvador and she lives in Las Vegas,NV. with our 2 kids.
I had to come here to adjust my leagal status. Also help me pray for my fast return home. I am in the last step of the process and just waiting for a phone call from the US embassy.
I love my wife and my babies, I believe in God and trust Him. I get weak sometimes and that’s why I need prayer from you for God to give us all standers the strength we need and that unconditional love for our spouses. Praise the Lord and God bless all of you. Please, if anybody knows of an online support group for me send me the info, as it is good to talk to other standers in faith.
(USA) Please pray for my husband to return home. I am seeking God above all else to mend my marriage. My husband told me a month ago that he no longer desired me and that the connection was gone. He told he wanted a divorce. We have not yet gone through the divorce proceedings. I’m praying God saves us before we do, that God softens his heart and brings him back home to his family.
(USA) Please pray for my marriage. It is been more than one year now since my wife left me. We have one son. She does not want to talk to me or see a counselor about our marriage until I sign the divorce papers for her. Please pray for us, for God to rend the heavens and come down in our marriage life. We really need miracle.
Isa 64:1 “Oh that you would rend the heavens and come down, that the mountains might quake at your presence— as when fire kindles brushwoodand the fire.”
(UGANDA) The one thing I believe in is that “Our GOD is a GOD of impossibilities.” I separated from my boyfriend in 2000 who left me for another woman. It was an extremely shocking and devastating experience to me. But I looked on to GOD and never stopped crying and begging him to look upon me, how my heart and whole body was so grieved.
Unbelievably, my prayers have been answered and he is back to me, after almost 11 years of separation. And that reunion, you can imagine, is only possible when you get close to GOD. I ask you to keep praying for me in this reunion and thank you for this kind of sharing. It makes up strong in the Lord.
(USA) My husband left me on November 14 and said that he no longer wanted to be married. We were supposed to have filed for divorce the following Monday, but he asked if we could hold off, that he needed time to think. Since that time he has been spending time with me, taking me to dinner, coming to the house for dinner, etc. I have apologized to him for my part in whatever caused him to leave and asked for forgiveness. He said he has done things wrong too and is thinking about things.
I am so confused as to where this is going. His relationship with the Lord is not as strong as mine. I love him and do not want to divorce. Please be praying with me that our marriage will be restored and that I will not give in to the lies the devil is telling me that this is not going to work, that he doesn’t love me, and he is eventually going to tell me he wants to file for divorce. Thank you all.
(USA) DEBBIE, Your husband loves you. The problem is that “today’s world” is filled with so many “instant” temptations. I know he is contemplating leaving, but, at the same time, he is also contemplating that he just may be making the mistake of his life. Just love him and stay positive. Of course pray, but prayer/faith without action is useless. Just love him and you both will refind each other.
(USA) My wife and I were friends for 12 years before we married. We were married for 5 years, and they were tough years. I had a terrible employer who was extremely abusive to all of the employees, but especially me. I was trapped in the situation of buying a new home, having to cope with bills and trying to keep my best friend and wife happy and secure. This caused great stress and after much prayer and trying alternative methods to help with severely debilitating panic attacks, we decided I needed medication to help through the rough patch. I quickly became addicted and I was an emotional mess for about 6 months.
There was never a word of her being unhappy. I found out she was seeing the bouncer at a local bar. At this time I was already terribly emotionally and mentally drained. I was truly in a terrible battle with the enemy and my best friend and partner wasn’t there to help me through it. At the end of the 6 months she was hanging out with the bouncer at the piano bar and I knew this but I chose to ignore the problem. This in turn caused great emotional turmoil and I began using the prescription more to cope with not only the horrible problems at work but also her emotional affairs.
In month 6 she left after an argument about her father who she put in control of our business and personal finances,(we had no major financial issues, he is just the type of man who wants to control everything he comes into contact with) a place I asked him to stay out of. After she left I put myself into the hospital to detox from the prescriptions and straighten my life out. She didn’t visit once. But I did receive divorce papers while in the hospital.
Once out I immediately began taking a drug and alcohol program to ensure I wouldn’t fall back on prescriptions to solve my problems. Its been 2 years and I have since obtained a high school diploma and in 3 months will be graduating from college with a degree in social work and a certified drug and alcohol counselor. She has set her wedding date with this man in a few months.
We are both Christians and the church is no where to be found in supporting our marriage. Everyone has abandoned me and I trust that God can soften her heart and return my wife back to our marriage that is lawful in God’s eyes even though it may not exist in the world’s eyes. Please pray that God will reconcile our marriage! I know that marrying her was what God wanted. I have remained pure to her and will continue to remain pure to our union for as long as it takes. I am crying out for prayer for my marriage. Please, please, please pray that God would soften her beautiful heart and open her eyes to the truth that is in the word! Please pray that she would disregard the foolish council of her father and her drunken friends!
(USA) Me and my Ex were married for 20 years and then we got a divorce… and 7 months later we were back together. Should we get remarried again because in God’s eyes, aren’t we still married?
(SOUTH AFRICA) I’m 25 and have been married for a year and half. I recently left my husband because of his extra marital affairs. When I left he soon went to file for divorce. I still love him so much but his mind is made up. He wants nothing to do with me. It’s like he was waiting for me to leave. I’m so heart broken. I pray to GOD to give me strength to move on. Please pray for me.
(SOUTH AFRICA) Hi everyone. I have also decided to stand. I am in such a devastating state. My wife left me 4 months ago for my friend and took my 9 year old son with her. About 6 months ago I invited him to come visit us. He is working in iraq. When he came to visit he was in the proses of divorcing his wife, who cheated on him. I must admit I have not been the perfect husband but never had an affair and was always home.
They started talking on Facebook and she said she emotionaly connected with him. He came back November 2011 and took her and my son, rented a house for them, bought her new furniture and gave her his car. She filed for divorce and I am still waiting for the summons. She wants nothing to do with me. Before she was a loving person. She suddenly became a stranger. She is a Christian but stopped reading the Bible.
It has been 4 months now. I cannot sleep, eat or focus on my job. Everything is against me. He has more money, is more attractive, and more adventurous. In Jan 2011 we bought a new house that she wanted. Here I am sitting in this cold emty house. I pray and pray that God will touch her heart. I decided to stand. We were maried for 9 years, together for 12. She says I must get over it and move on. I simply cannot. Please my Heavenly Father, help me. Touch her heart. Please everyone, pray for me.
(GERMANY) I will pray for you. My husband left me and kids too….I know how you feel right now. I love my husband more then anything. I always think about him.
O Lord, source of all wisdome and understanding, help us to work through our difference and be reunited as one. I am always thankful for Your love and guidance. Please Lord, hear my prayer. Heavenly Father, Creator of all man and woman, hear my prayer. Bring us to be one heart and mind with each other, and rebuild the bond of love between us. Amen.
(GERMANY) My husband left me on October 26th 2011. Till January 1st 2012 he wanted me, but then he started sleeping with another woman and since then he is saying he wants a divorce. I don’t want one. So please pray for us to get back together. We have kids too. I love my husband and I want to stay with him.
(KENYA) Dear Jesus, Thank you Lord, that you hear us when we pray and that you are the Great Provider. Father I remember Your word that says give and it shall come back to you, and Father I bless your name that my sister Leyla in Germany has found it in her to pray for another hurting soul in the middle of her own pain. Bless her abundantly for that.
Lord, I pray that you will remember her with kindness today. Lord I pray that you will turn the heart of her husband (your son) to you and turn Your heart to him (as you have said that you will turn the heart of the sons to their fathers and the hearts of the fathers to their sons.) Please turn his heart of stone to flesh Lord and speak to Him in the far country and convict him of his need for you. Let him give his heart to you and return to his family. Father, though he chases after other lovers,may he not find them. May he remember the wife of his youth and say to himself that he was better off with her and return to his wife and children, and be content with the wife of his youth. Let the prodigal return home Father for your glory.
Change Leyla and her husband’s hearts that they may love each other and serve each other as you intended in their marriage that it may glorify You. Strengthen Leyla to take care of her children while alone,provide for her and give her strength and grace to keep praying and not give up. Protect her babies Lord, give your angels charge over them to watch them in all their ways, and may their peace be great even in the midst of this turmoil. May you transform her through a renewal of her mind; may she hide your word in her heart that she may not sin against you. May you hear her when she calls you from Your holy hill and may she be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. For we war not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world,and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore, teach your daughter to put on the full armor of God.And to pray unceasingly, giving thanks to you for your goodness.
And when You have answered her prayers Lord, may everyone around her see and perceive, know and understand, that You alone have done this. For your glory alone. In Jesus name, amen.
(SOUTH AFRICA) Hi everyone. Having read your story I’m so touched. My husband said he wants a divorce. First, he lied that he had a 4 year old child with someone he has been seeing for the duration of our marriage. He said he loved her more. It turned out she had someone else who now is accusing my husband.
Later the reasons were I’m jealous, controlling and did not like his family. The last one was I’m difficult with no specific details. After I left he started drinking and making debts. After 5 months he said he wants to get things back to normal but later said he does not mean it. All this time I have been sleeping with him as he came to see me regularly.
I had decided to file for divorce when I called a Radio counseling program and was advised not to but to fight the spiritual war and pray for him too. I still love him so much. He still calls every 2nd day to check on how I’m doing. When I call he talks. Seemingly he does not want to lose contact. I live about 200 km from him now, and have taken most of the furniture. He did not seem to fight for anything or ask for anything. He has not filed for divorce. It’s so confusing.
BUT I WILL WIN THIS WAR, WHATEVER WEAPON IS FORMED AGAINST MY MARRIAGE WILL NOT SUCCEED. I WILL keep on praying. I WILL PRAY FOR ALL OF YOU. LET US DRAW STRENGTH FROM THE BLOOD OF JESUS CHRIST WHO DIED FOR US. IN JESUS, WE ARE CONQUERORS.