Do you feel hopeless and helpless in trying to save your marriage? Do you long to read and view marriage testimonies where the couples come out on the good side, rather than the bad?
This goes along with something that Gary Thomas wrote:
“We need stories for couples who struggle, persevere, and come out on the other side; I recount a lot of those kinds of stories in Sacred Marriage. But we also need stories of couples who find the “sweet, happy spot” of marriage.” (From the book, “Cherish”)
We agree.
Save Marriage Testimonies Needed
“There can come a point in any marriage when you get fed up. You’ve lost patience with waiting to see some kind of change in your spouse. You’ve forgiven again and again; and you’re weary of the struggle. You’re through with trying to make things better. Additionally, you’re tired of being hurt over and over and waiting for a breakthrough that never comes.
“The years have taken their toll, and you subconsciously (or consciously) decide you are not going to try anymore. You no longer feel love for your husband (wife) the way you did, and you don’t even care about getting it back.
“This can happen in any marriage where one spouse is working to make things better and the other isn’t trying at all. Your heart can grow cold and hard like a stone; and it will seem as if the love you once had has died. But the good news is that God has the power to completely turn things around. He is the God of miracles and restoration who makes all things new. Jesus —the ultimate source of resurrection power —can resurrect love that has died and soften your heart toward your spouse. He can also bring your marriage to life again.” (Stormie Omartian, from the book, “Praying Through the Deeper Issues of Marriage”)
And that is what we want to show you here in this topic. Marriages CAN be restored. We’re not saying that everyone’s marriage will be restored. But it gives hope. And with hope, faith, and following God’s lead, it’s amazing what can happen.
So, the following are “Real Life” testimonies from people who have fought to save their marriages who have experienced God’s special touch in their marriages and circumstances. We believe you will be encouraged and find hope for yourself through reading them.
Marriage Testimonies:
• WHY I STAYED: A Wife’s Focus on God Saves Her Marriage
• HOPE FOR THE HOPELESS MARRIAGE
• HER HUSBAND WOULDN’T SPEAK TO HER FOR 3 YEARS
Plus:
• I REALIZED I WAS WRONG AND THAT I WAS A BAD HUSBAND
• THE NIGHT MY MARRIAGE ALMOST ENDED
Also:
• GOD CAN RESURRECT YOUR MARRIAGE FROM THE ASHES
• MARRIAGE PUT BACK TOGETHER AFTER DIVORCE
• MARRIAGE RESTORED AND HUSBAND AND DAD FORGIVEN
In Addition:
• 3 COUPLES WHOSE MARRIAGES WERE SAVED
• HOW TRUSTING GOD HEALED MY MARRIAGE
• RESTORED MARRIAGE TESTIMONIES
Video Clips &/or Written of Testimonies of Marriages That Were Saved:
• FUNNY HOW GOD CAN CHANGE A MARRIAGE
• BOB AND CHARLYNE STEINKAMP: Testimony of Marriage Restoration – Part 1
• BOB AND CHARLYNE STEINKAMP: Testimony – Part 2
Additionally:
• THE ANDERSONS: Her Affair Destroyed (and Saved) Their Marriage
• THE STEWARTS: Re-Married, For Better or Worse
• SCORNED WIFE HOLDS UNFAITHFUL HUSBAND’S LIFE
And:
• THE AGOSTOS: A Marriage Revival
• ROSCO & AMY BACKUS: Striking Out at Home
• THE BRYANTS: A Christmas Miracle of Marriage Restoration
And There’s More:
• THE BUNSES: Once Upon a Broken Marriage
• DAVID CARON: Reality Check at Death’s Door
• THE FOREHANDS: Inside a Stained Glass Marriage
Plus:
• STEVE AND TERRY HAYES: Marriage Do-Over
• THE SCRUGGS: In Love with My Ex
And:
• THE HAPPOLDTS: Happily Married At Last!
• PAT and GAYLE: Warming a Cold Marriage With Hope
Lastly:
• BRANDIE AND DUSTIN: Finding Love in a Destroyed Marriage
• DAVE AND KIRSTEN: God Restored Our Marriage
If God has done a special work in your marriage that could encourage others, we want to hear from you. Please share your testimony with us by going to the CONTACT section. Click on “Contact Us” and write your testimony there.
(USA) This site has encouraged me so much. I have been in this battle for my marriage for at least 4 years and things just seem to get worse and worse. There have been times when I have had no idea what to pray, I have been bitter and resentful, blamed him for ruining my life. I have acted selfishly at times and I have completely shut him out in order to protect my self from anymore hurt. I literally have been in survival mode over drive, and as I write this letter I am thinking if I have ever really not been in survival mode since I first met my husband.
When we met I had just left a bad situation (sexual abuse, and lots of rejection from foster parents) and he was the first man that I ever gave a real chance to, (whatever that’s supposed to be). With everyone else before him… I was so (selfish). This site has been water in a desert and I feel like I can run on and see what the end is going to be.
Please pray for my family, for me and for my husband. I don’t know what I have put him through all these years. I tend to take on responsibilities that aren’t mine so I pray this is not one of those times, but please pray for me and my family. No matter how it ends I know God works all things together for those who love him and are called according to his purpose. God is always on time and this site has been right on time. God bless
(USA) My wife and I have been married for 6 years now and together for 9. I am 27 she is 24. We were both raised in church. I am a pastor’s son and she was raised by a very spiritual grandmother. Needless to say, we have had a rough time. I am in the military and have spent 2 of the last 6 years of our marriage overseas (Iraq/Afghanistan). Throughout our time, I cheated on her once, and she cheated on me once. We worked through both issues and somehow managed to keep our marraige intact (very extremely hard).
As of late, I have felt God dealing with me in new ways. We have been living our life against God’s will. Drinking, partying, not going to church, not reading the Bible, not praying. And randomly without expectation on Easter Sunday, my wife asked me for a divorce. Her reasons were that I was a money spender (we make plenty but I do spend a lot) and that I wasn’t the same man, and that I was childish. Although we had batted the idea around before this time she was extremely sincere. I did everything I could for 2 weeks and she will not change her mind. Finally I realized why. I couldn’t solve my issues myself so I turned to God… one night while praying I gave my life back to God, gave my marraige, my wife, and my entire vessel to God. I told him that I was his now, and that he is #1 in my life and no longer my wife (she is #2).
For the last 72 hours God has been using me. I feel like a sponge that cannot be filled I have started a journal to keep track of everything that god is doing in me. I have known since a young age that I was called to the ministry and I have been running for 26 years. In the last 72 hours, I have had 2 visions from God that I’ve had interpreted, and I have fought 2 demonic presences in my house. I truly feel an outpouring here in my home. My wife being a Christian (somewhat… as was I) sees my changes and still does not budge on the divorce Idea.
I realize that I have not been the compassionate Christian man, that I should have been (we both have plenty of faults). But mine were not of love. She knows the love I have for her. My fault was that I put it above God. I lavish her with gifts, and she says that she would rather have financial stability. So I have sold all my toys…motorcycle, playstation 3, Wii, Boxing gear, UFC gear ETC. I have started saving money in an account for her, and have begged her to stay… NOTHING IS WORKING.
I am not a lazy husband either. I cook 80% of the time, do laundry 50% and clean the house with her. I literally give her all that I am and it is all to no avail. All I have left is to pray that God will soften her heart. She says she “fell out of love with me” yet she says she still “Loves me.” It hurts so bad. I feel like Job… as if God is stripping me of everything because I was not in his will. How long must I wait Lord? How long? Bring my wife back to me… please. I give you my all Lord, just bring her back. She still lives with me but in the spare bedroom and has taken off her rings and acts as though we are friends. Please encourage me to survive this guys.
(USA) Get her out on a date. Some of the stuff you’re saying sounds like she is already in an affair. Check out http://www.divorcebusting.com for strategies of dealing with a pending divorce.
(LESOTHO) My husband has walked out on me and my three children. He has moved in with his girlfriend of three years and they are expecting a baby. I am a born-again Christian; he is not but we were both not when we got married. When I was trying to fight to save the marriage we were and still are not using similar weapons. I pray and hope with God all our mistakes can be turned around and we found a solution but that is a different case altogether. I still believe God can work a miracle although sometimes I get so discouraged when I realize he is bonding with his girlfriend and in the future with his new baby. When we meet there is absolutely nothing to talk about and when he talks in my presence he does not even look me in the eye.
I know only God has the answer but please just reassure me as Christians that although I am the only one who is praying for the survival of this marriage that God will listen and help me out. I kind of need some reassurance that I can fight alone and beg God for his mercy to save this marriage.
(SA) After being separated from my husband for 6 months, praying and fighting him away from the other woman and refusing to allow the devil to take what God gave to me, with the help of my in laws, friends and family and the Lord, my husband is back home. I fought for him with my soul, I prayed for him to change and I prayed for me to change and I prayed to God to show me a miracle as I had no intention of grieving Him through a divorce.
I knew my husband was what many would declare a hopeless case, a lost cause but I had to focus on the good nature he had and the side of him I so loved to win him over the side that made him feel he could find happiness outside. The Lord is powerful, He can bring life to a lifeless marriage. God brought my husband to his knees literally. First his mistress turned out to be a cheat, he found her with another man, then one by one he began losing everything he valued, trouble began at work, stress took over and before he knew it he had a mental break down. At that point I had given in to the idea that maybe, just maybe, I am better off without him.
That was when God’s miracle happened. He is a changed man, I am a changed woman, we are friends again, then lovers, then husband & wife, then parents. We are closer now, I have forgiven him and he’s forgiven me (I was after all a demanding wife). We pray together, dream together and fight together as a team to keep us and our family safe. We saw who our enermy was in our marriage and with the help of God we fought the enemy. My husband had to experience the loss and break down for him to have a WAKE UP call. Believe me he is AWAKE! Although it might not be this way for many of you, I pray you do not give up or give in. One of you has to remain fighting, believing, praying for change to happen.
I hate divorce says the Lord, and that was all I had to keep me going in winning back my husband and going through the process of change myself to see things through. Have faith. I know for me it will be both hard and good work from here on, but this website was like a recharge centre for me. When I was down I would find something to read that would remind me of my goal-to restore, rebuild my marriage. My husband and I recieve the weekly newsletter, it becomes a topic of discussion for us for that week and it has made us see how much we both value our marriage. Thank you and God Bless all marriages and send His angels to fight for the family union to be protected from the enemy. Amen.
(LESOTHO) Thank you Des for your posting. I feel like it is talking to me directly. Everyday I look at my situation and realize that indeed it is a hopeless one but I always put my trust in God because He alone can raise the dead. My marriage is as good as dead especially with my husband living with his girlfriend and their unborn child meaning he has all chances of bonding with that family. However, all I know is that we serve an awesome God. All He needs from us is trust and patience, very rare things in this era especially the latter.
(NEW ZEALAND) My husband first left me for another woman going on four years ago now. I was determined to make a stand for my marriage and family right from the outset but I did not realise how things were going to unfold along the way. We had three children at the time of him first leaving me but now have another one. We have gotten back together about 6 times throughout the last few years and the other woman is who he has been with when not with me.
I cannot make sense of why things have happened this way but I do know for sure that my God has guided me every step of the way and has been there for me, always! I have grown more in love with Jesus and He has done and is continuing to do a mighty work in me. I have forgiven my husband and am continuing to allow God to work in me as I desire to walk in total forgiveness for the other woman who is actually my ex sister in law (my husbands brothers ex wife). We all live in the same small community so it has been very difficult for me as I have been confronted with the reality of my husband living with the other woman, having our children stay with them and seeing them together at our children’s sports etc.
In saying that though God has been healing my heart and strengthening me by allowing me to witness some of that stuff. It has allowed me to measure my growth in Him and to know whether I truly trust Him, have peace through Him and desire nothing or no one besides Him. What I find very difficult at this point in time is that my husband has split up with the other woman for the however many times and has indicated that he wants to work things out. But I don’t know any more how sincere he is because of his track record. In the past he has said all the right things, did all the right things to lead me to believe that he’s sincere, only to leave me and the kids again.
I am at the point where I’m saying to God-I don’t care anymore Lord, if my husband doesn’t want me and finds it too hard to let go of the other woman, because all I want is to do Your will and make You the most important thing in my life! My husband has walked away from the Lord so my prayer for a year or so now has been more about his restored relationship with God and not my marriage.
Another question I ask is, does he have to be recommitted to God first before we are to be reconciled? I don’t see how it can work if God isn’t in his life and helping him to do what he needs to do. At this very moment my husband and I are trying to work things out, he is living at his mums but still in close proximity to the other woman and I was told this morning by my son who stayed with my husband last night, that he went somewhere in the middle of the night. I can’t help but think that he went to the other woman as there is no where else that he would go in the middle of the night.
Rather than be lied to and deceived all over again, I would much rather tell him that I do not want to get back together. I am so okay without him in my life and actually think I am better off without him. Please hear my heart, I am in no way bitter towards my husband and the other woman. I just desire so much to get on with what God has for me and I don’t want anything to get in the way of that, even my husband! I claim and believe in the promises of God and do stand on those daily. I’m just not sure whether the timing for restoration is now?
If someone out there has some advice for me or God prompts you to give me a word, I would appreciate that. God’s love and blessing be upon you all! xoxo
(USA) Tineke, I LOVE your heart! It’s very evident that God is doing a mighty work within your heart and life with your being able to forgive your husband, and that you have obviously been participating with God in this work. How I thank God that you are being released from the prison of embitterment and unforgiveness that is a trap for so many! It’s such a sad, sad situation that you and your children have been through, but as your sister in Christ, I rejoice that you are finding freedom.
As for reconciling with your husband, I have to say that I don’t know what is in your future. But for right now, from what you have written, I agree with you that you cannot trust this man at this point. He willfully and unfaithfully walked away from the covenant of your marriage and has not since shown himself to be trustworthy or repentant — quite the contrary. And if he is not repentant and reconciled in his relationship with God, he is capable of hurting your heart and the heart of your children again with his unfaithful ways. There is a difference between forgiving him and reconciling with him. I’m so glad you have forgiven him, but I caution you about reconciling unless every doubt is gone that he is sincerely repentant and shows you his sincerity and walks in truth (for a very long time).
I pray the Lord gives you wisdom and discernment and continuing peace and hope in the future as you raise your children with faithfulness being lived out within your home. I pray for your husband, that the Lord enlightens him and leads him to repentance and reconciliation in his relationship with Jesus Christ, not only as his savior, but as His Lord. May God bless you abundantly!
(GERMANY) Its been a month now and things has not really been going too well in our marriage. I’ve driven my husband to a point where right now I think he has given up in this marriage. At one point he said he didn’t love me anymore and that he wanted a divorce and if we were to stay together it would solely be for the sake of our two year old son. But of course after the big ‘fight’ I asked him if he meant what he said, to which he replied, no, it was only because he was angry and he never meant a word he said.
But yet after this, he seems distant and would always avoid eye contact when saying I love you and the intimacy seems to be lacking. I know its only been a month but it scares me that things could get worse. I wake up every morning with this fear that he would leave me and that he doesn’t love me anymore. I don’t blame him really. Yes, he did some things that hurt me so much but in bitterness over the past year I’ve ill treated him. And when this happened it has somehow opened my eyes and made me realize how much I have been hurting him with my words and unforgiving heart. Now, I regret so much everything I’ve done and I just don’t know what to do. Although he is still saying I love you and all but he is more distant then he has ever been in our three years of marriage. Yes, I’m praying but other than that I don’t know what else I am suppose to do.
(NEW ZEALAND) Thank you Cindy for encouragement, wisdom and prayer. I really do appreciate this. I have had an opportunity since my last entry to share with my husband how much God loves Him and wants to forgive him. This was done via email and he received it well. God continues to be in control of my situation and I am trying to listen to the Holy Spirit every step of the way. Words cannot express how thankful I am for God’s faithfulness to me and my children and also my husband. Bless you Cindy!
(US) I have been married for almost 2 yrs, but have been with my wife for over 8 yrs. We have a daughter who’s 2 and a half and is the most amazing gift I’ve ever been given. In the last 2 yrs I have lost both my sisters to cystic fibrosis, had a miscarriage with my wife, and many trials, that I can’t begin to list. For years we loved each other without any question. But with everything that has happened, we have grown apart somehow… My wife feels as though her love is not there for me anymore.
I can’t begin to describe what a hole that has dug into me. I am usually a tough individual, the type who doesn’t cry even at his sister’s funerals. Perhaps that was my mistake… I am affectionate, but I think it’s just been an emotional rollercoaster these past couple of yrs. and raising an infant in the mist of it all is enough stress by itself. I’ve believed in God my whole life, and in my own time was studying to be a preacher. I know he can do all things, But man does it hurt… I love her. More than the flowers love the sun, just never thought I’d hear those words.
Please pray for us, I know God would not let us go. Not just to fade away. Our love was unique to us, and in my heart it is still there. I pray God would soften her and help her to forgive me for my faults. I’ve lost enough, I really can’t lose the one part of my soul that I gave her. Please have mercy on me God, please. I love her and always will.
(KENYA) I will say a big thank you to this website and its contributors. I have just made up with my loving husband after 12weeks of conflict that was almost ending up in a separation. I am the one who wronged my husband but I did not realize how much I had hurt him until he withdrew himself from me completely and wanted nothing to do with me. I tried everything to reconcile us but my efforts were in vain. In an emotional moment I moved out of my matrimonial bed and went to sleep with my children in their room. It was during this period that I stumbled across this website as I was searching for divorce articles and what the future for a divorcee holds.
I went on my knees many times, cried and prayed to God to save my marriage, of course I expected a swift answer but that did not happen, I fasted and even dedicated one week to praying for my marriage 7 times a day. Still no answer from God. Finally I decided to look into the scriptures and examine myself critically, the book of Proverbs talked to my soul. I prayed to God to give me hope and to release all the bitterness and resentment that I held towards my husband. I must say this was the first time I felt at peace and knew in my heart that somehow God was in control and He did not want us to break up.
Believe it or not hardly 2 days passed when I received a message by phone from my husband telling me that I am free to file for a divorce (we were still not talking). Strangely, I did not panic or even fear and in a weird way knew that this was the break through I had been waiting for -because if he had wanted a divorce he would have told me that HE is filing for it and would not have asked me to file for it INSTEAD! I smiled at the message, did not reply to it but told God that I was ready to reconcile. In the evening I went to my exile room (my children’s bedroom) locked myself in, said a quick prayer and slept.
To cut the long story short, that night my husband asked me to talk. We had a heated discussion, I apologized for my mistake and we made up. We are still taking it one day at a time as we know 3 months is a long time to withdraw from a spouse and fleeing the matrimonial bed is a great risk that I wouldn’t recommend, but I am happy to say God answered my prayers in his time in his way.
(SOUTH AFRICA) If you read this, please pray for me and my husband to be reunited. I love my husband dearly. He decided to leave me, due to us not having things incommon, and fighting too much. He wants to file for divorce. I really do need everybody’s prayer. I am broken. Thank You.
(NIGERIA) I am so happy I located this site. I currently have a problem in my marriage of about ten years and I am really trusting for God for a miracle. We had a rough time settling down after our wedding due to the fact that we discovered huge personal and family differences that brought quite the conflict. I did not handle some of the issues well too. My husband expected me to be 100% in support of his actions (right and wrong) but I sometimes tried to play diplomacy between him and my family and got my fingers burnt as this only brought more conflict.
These issues took place over six years ago but he has refused to to forgive and forget despite my apologies, literally cutting off my family and struggling to make him happy. No matter what I do now in the past years, he is not impressed and calls me a piece of furniture in his house. I have suffered severe verbal and emotional abuse in the past years. He makes it clear that my actions in the past have put me in the situation I am in now and I should just wait and see how things evolve. Despite all this, his expectations for me in caring for his mentally handicapped sibling and filling other roles has not diminished.
He now has extramarital affairs and seems to be making attempts to move on with someone else (we have lived in separate towns for about 4 years as a result of his work). His only concern with me now is our kids and the whole thing has taken a toll on his Christian life; he does not even go to church or really believe in God anymore.
What do I do now? He does not even feel he owes me an explanation for the affairs though I can rightly predict that if he has to explain, he will tell me I caused it. He is not ready to listen to anyone so all I have been doing is praying. What do you advise?
(USA) Dear Eve, I don’t know if you will read this, it’s been quite some time since your post, but I want to share that regardless what happened in your marriage, your husband blaming you is an excuse for him to not take responsibility for his behavior. He is choosing not to forgive you, and he is disobeying God and His Word, God’s command to forgive.
Yes, he is abusive in his behavior towards you. You are doing the best thing by praying! God has all the answers. Listen to Him, He will speak to you. God wants to heal you, your husband and your marriage and family. He loves all of you very much. I’ve been through similar experiences and related to your pain and suffering. I am fighting for my husband, and my marriage in prayer. May this find you richly blessed by the Lord.
(UNITED STATES) Well, My story is a long one, but I will make it short. I’m 21, and was with my husband for 3 years. Things were going well, but went downhill… horribly. I got pregnant when I was 19, and we got married when I was 20, much too early for our own good. (His recruiter made that happen.)
So things started getting really rough when I found out he was not going to make it in the Navy. So now, at this point in time, he was out of the job, and I was not being a good wife and mother at the time, so I thought it was good idea to sign divorce papers and go to Job Corps to get a career and a good job. That was my mistake.
After I got away from things, and thought things out, it turns out that in all reality, I never wanted a divorce and I’m still in love with him. But now the damage has been done, and he let go of waiting for me, and signed the divorce paper as well. I tried reasoning with him, asking him to start over. Lets make it work, because I did not want a divorce.
He is fully content on not resolving anything anymore, and he says he has his new “life.” Now, I want our marriage back more than anything. I’ve been praying for him, and our marriage and that God will put it in his heart to come back. He is the only man I have ever been with and he is my daughter’s father. This has been happening over number of months. I love him so much, and I will always love him. I want him back in my life!!! I’ve been praying to God, and asking for a second chance. I do believe that God can bring broken things back together, Please keep me in your prayers!! and God Bless!
(USA) This marriage testimony blog is an inspiration to struggling married couples. What is being accomplished here is very much in line with Christian marriage advice being offered at Christian Marriage HQ. This website is full of Scriptures and bible-based marital advice to guide us as Christian married couples.
(UNITED KINGDON) God restored my marriage
(USA) How did He restore your marriage? Please tell us your story.
(UNITED KINGDOM) I am sure this message will help a helpless man/woman out there who is wandering what to do after the spouse abandon them. My husband left me with 2 young kids for 2 and half years but in the power of the Lord he is back in our lives and our marriage is far better than it was before. The day he left he was sure that he was going be happy without me. I cried to God, I begged him and asked Jesus to change my terrible way I used to respond to bad things my husband used to do to me. I learned to be HUMBLE, just to trust in the Lord. My husband has moved from the city to city looking for love and happiness. He moved from woman to woman, different races and colour but he was always sad. Each time he come to visit kids he could see me as a changed and humbled woman; Kids could welcome him as a king in home. Then one day Jesus ordered him to come home. He is happy now, He is treating us as princess. Kids are so happy. The house is warm and full joys and laughs. Please when your spouse abandon you don’t give up on your family just hand in their and stand for FUTURE JOY. Be humble, trust in the Lord and everthing else will land on in your hands freely.
Good luck