Do you feel hopeless and helpless in trying to save your marriage? Do you long to read and view marriage testimonies where the couples come out on the good side, rather than the bad?
This goes along with something that Gary Thomas wrote:
“We need stories for couples who struggle, persevere, and come out on the other side; I recount a lot of those kinds of stories in Sacred Marriage. But we also need stories of couples who find the “sweet, happy spot” of marriage.” (From the book, “Cherish”)
We agree.
Save Marriage Testimonies Needed
“There can come a point in any marriage when you get fed up. You’ve lost patience with waiting to see some kind of change in your spouse. You’ve forgiven again and again; and you’re weary of the struggle. You’re through with trying to make things better. Additionally, you’re tired of being hurt over and over and waiting for a breakthrough that never comes.
“The years have taken their toll, and you subconsciously (or consciously) decide you are not going to try anymore. You no longer feel love for your husband (wife) the way you did, and you don’t even care about getting it back.
“This can happen in any marriage where one spouse is working to make things better and the other isn’t trying at all. Your heart can grow cold and hard like a stone; and it will seem as if the love you once had has died. But the good news is that God has the power to completely turn things around. He is the God of miracles and restoration who makes all things new. Jesus —the ultimate source of resurrection power —can resurrect love that has died and soften your heart toward your spouse. He can also bring your marriage to life again.” (Stormie Omartian, from the book, “Praying Through the Deeper Issues of Marriage”)
And that is what we want to show you here in this topic. Marriages CAN be restored. We’re not saying that everyone’s marriage will be restored. But it gives hope. And with hope, faith, and following God’s lead, it’s amazing what can happen.
So, the following are “Real Life” testimonies from people who have fought to save their marriages who have experienced God’s special touch in their marriages and circumstances. We believe you will be encouraged and find hope for yourself through reading them.
Marriage Testimonies:
• WHY I STAYED: A Wife’s Focus on God Saves Her Marriage
• HOPE FOR THE HOPELESS MARRIAGE
• HER HUSBAND WOULDN’T SPEAK TO HER FOR 3 YEARS
Plus:
• I REALIZED I WAS WRONG AND THAT I WAS A BAD HUSBAND
• THE NIGHT MY MARRIAGE ALMOST ENDED
Also:
• GOD CAN RESURRECT YOUR MARRIAGE FROM THE ASHES
• MARRIAGE PUT BACK TOGETHER AFTER DIVORCE
• MARRIAGE RESTORED AND HUSBAND AND DAD FORGIVEN
In Addition:
• 3 COUPLES WHOSE MARRIAGES WERE SAVED
• HOW TRUSTING GOD HEALED MY MARRIAGE
• RESTORED MARRIAGE TESTIMONIES
Video Clips &/or Written of Testimonies of Marriages That Were Saved:
• FUNNY HOW GOD CAN CHANGE A MARRIAGE
• BOB AND CHARLYNE STEINKAMP: Testimony of Marriage Restoration – Part 1
• BOB AND CHARLYNE STEINKAMP: Testimony – Part 2
Additionally:
• THE ANDERSONS: Her Affair Destroyed (and Saved) Their Marriage
• THE STEWARTS: Re-Married, For Better or Worse
• SCORNED WIFE HOLDS UNFAITHFUL HUSBAND’S LIFE
And:
• THE AGOSTOS: A Marriage Revival
• ROSCO & AMY BACKUS: Striking Out at Home
• THE BRYANTS: A Christmas Miracle of Marriage Restoration
And There’s More:
• THE BUNSES: Once Upon a Broken Marriage
• DAVID CARON: Reality Check at Death’s Door
• THE FOREHANDS: Inside a Stained Glass Marriage
Plus:
• STEVE AND TERRY HAYES: Marriage Do-Over
• THE SCRUGGS: In Love with My Ex
And:
• THE HAPPOLDTS: Happily Married At Last!
• PAT and GAYLE: Warming a Cold Marriage With Hope
Lastly:
• BRANDIE AND DUSTIN: Finding Love in a Destroyed Marriage
• DAVE AND KIRSTEN: God Restored Our Marriage
If God has done a special work in your marriage that could encourage others, we want to hear from you. Please share your testimony with us by going to the CONTACT section. Click on “Contact Us” and write your testimony there.
(T&T) I have been married for over ten years and I recently found out my husband is still seeing his ex, has a gambling addiction and is exchanging pornography materials with friends and co-workers. He comes across as an upright citizen and a man of integrity. I knew something was wrong but I could not fully identify it until I prayed and asked God to reveal to me what was happening because for the last two years he became emotionally distant.
To my great surprise, solid information about his infidelity became known to me e.g. emails, letters, bills, plan vacation etc. I started to confront him with some of the evidence and he doesn’t wish to speak about it. He’d rather we go our separate ways because of some of the things he is doing and saying but he wants me to be the one to ask for a divorce. Please help.
Dear Avee, How my heart goes out to you! I have to say that after reading your comment, I’m not sure of all you should do. But there are a few things I feel impressed to tell you. Please pray about what I am writing here and see if you think I heard God right in this. Please do NOT be the one who asks for the divorce. I don’t know the laws in T&T, but if it is possible, stand strong. Your husband is trying to get you to participate into his ability to play the blame game. If you are the one who asks for the divorce he can work it around in his own mind and in what he tells others, to blame you for the marriage breaking apart. He can say, “See! She divorced me. I didn’t abandon her.” If you can stand strong in making HIM do the filing for divorce instead of you (if that’s what it comes down to), that would be better. It’s not great… but it’s better because God can use it to convict his heart.
But what you can do is demand that adultery is not brought into the home where you live in. His emails, letters, bills, vacation plans, infidelity, and activity in exchanging pornography is all cheating. His gambling activity is a type of robbery he is committing in your marriage. He is stealing money from what is both of yours to satisfy himself alone. Either he should leave, or you should UNTIL and UNLESS he changes his ways and starts participating in this marriage, in a healthy way. This is different than asking for a divorce. You are protecting your sanity, your ability to live in peace in the sanctity of where you live –rather than the chaos his activities bring into your life. IF he changes, then you can see if the change is genuine and see about reconciling, as you go through the process of testing the sincerity of his convictions and actions –whether they match. God will guide, I’m sure of it, as you give it to Him.
Beyond that, the best thing you can do is pray. Be intentional in not lowering your standards and also not being judgmental. Ask God to show you how to do all of this without throwing verbal stones at him, if that is possible. Be honest, be direct, put down reasonable boundaries, and protect yourself, but give God the elbow room to work on your husband’s heart without your acting like you are his Holy Spirit. Let God do that. Protect your heart and body and home, as God shows you, and leave the convicting to God. I truly hope this helps. May God empower you to do what needs to be done and give you peace in the midst of this storm. My prayers are with you.
(US) I found the Lord 1 yr ago. I trust and believe and have faith that anything is possible through Jesus. In April I will he married 4 yrs. My husband broke my heart 2 1/2 yrs ago after our son was born. It’s been a struggle. I knew he was cheating (has a child outside marriage) and abusing alcohol.
But due to my faith he has made a change for the better. It takes time. There are days when the enemy trys to get the best of me, but I am a child of God! A sanctified wife sanctifys her husband! The power of prayer works.
(AMERICA) My husband just told me a week ago he wanted to separate. He said he wasn’t happy and needed to be by himself. It has really hurt me. I have been praying for him and our marriage. I believe with God we can work this out eventually. We have two children. We need all the prayers we can get.
(USA) I am done praying and waiting for him. I’ve come to think that I was born to be a human sacrifice. I know my husband does not love me and he will not divorce me for finacial reasons. He was arrested for domestic violence. His mother and him assaulted me with our 5 year old in his arms and his mother yelling, kill her or I will. He blames me and has chosen and always choses to live with mother. He takes my son’s food money to meet his mother’s needs to visit FL. Every month no child support… he does not care because his mother does not care. He sides with her and she with him and gives him permission to treat the mother of his child as garbage.
He faked having prostrate cancer, stage 4, so I would not show up to court. Also he had my cell phone disconnected the day the DA /soliciters office told him that they would be calling me to court and testify regarding domestic violence charges. I give up but have no funds for divorce and I am embarrassed and ashamed for being stupid. I do not want to tell the solicitor.
I just don’t see how God is on my side. It seems that I got what I deserved for being so stupid. But I am not mad at GOD and I still believe. I just don’t believe in him or my marrage to him. On the positive side God is powerful and I have faith that he will change my life for the better with his grace. He already has my 5 year old, who believes in him and his son Jesus and has conversations with me about GOD. I am so grateful.
Dear Carol, Upon reading your comment and praying, what I see here is that you have a classic case of abuse going on. Please read through the “Abuse in Marriage” topic. As you read through it you will see that most abuse happens because the abusing spouse feels he or she has lost control of the situation on some level, and so they lash out in ways that are abusive. His actions and then what you said about his faking prostrate cancer are ways of trying to gain control and not being accountable for inappropriate and downright wrong behavior.
Again, please read through the topic on abuse because you need to better understand the manipulations of an abuser. And then you need to do something about it. If you go into the “Links and Recommended Resources” part of that topic, you will see contact information for hot lines and such, on abuse. Please contact at least one of them and talk it through with someone who knows a lot about this type of behavior. You need to do this for you and you need to do this for your son. He needs to have his her father at the very least, help in financially supporting him and NOT abuse his mother.
Also, he is watching his father and he is watching you as to how you both react in these types of circumstances where one parent is hurting the other. I don’t know the whole situation but what you describe was not only abuse that YOU received but that he saw and was a part of, as he was watching it all. This should not be so. You need to protect yourself and your son from this type of wrong behavior in the future. A domestic violence counselor can tell you how to do that (as well as the info we have posted on this web site).
And for your son to hear his “grandmother” (I hate to use that term to describe this woman, because as you describe her actions, she doesn’t sound like much of a grandmother) –to hear her scream out what she did, that type of behavior will emotionally scar him. This young boy is impressionable and needs your protection and you need protection. I hope you will talk to a Domestic Abuse counselor (it won’t cost you financially). This type of behavior should never happen to you or to your son again, if you can in any way prevent it. I hope it doesn’t. I hope you will reach out and then receive the help you need. I pray for you and your son. May God grant you both favor in bringing peace into your life and into your home.
(UNITED KINGDOM) Hello everyone, my name is Sharon, I have been married for 3 years having known my husband for 12 years in total, which includes those that we’ve been married. He’s the love of my life meaning he’s the only man I have ever truly loved. I thought I was the same for him, until last year in September 2011, when we started having challenages in our marriage. In November I upset him by not submitting, being quite challenging and he packed up everything of his and left.
Its been 6 months and I haven’t seen him. I have apologised over and over again and he won’t give in. I have been praying and fasting. I have a pastor who has been standing in agreement with me. He went on holiday and came back, and he tried to call me but I was not available, so I called him a couple of weeks later, and he told me its been sooooo long we need to meet soon and he told me he would contact me.
So I got so exicted thinking this is it. I encouraged him to meet me soon but he insisted that not that soon, cause he’s still sorting himself out. I felt so disregarded by him. I was so disappointed. I felt God had not answered my prayers although God has shown me my husband is coming back home a couple of times through dreams.
At this point I asked for a divorce and he gave all the rights to go ahead, but I thought no, I am not going to file for divorce. I love my husband and I now know that God is firmly against divorce, thanx to this site. At the moment my number can’t get through to his. He locked his phone so that I can’t call him. However, I am still standing firmly in prayer and believing that God is more than able to fullfill his promises in his own time.
But I must agree with you guys this is tough. It’s tough soooo tough to the point that we also must get tough at the devil who tries to break what God has joined together. So lets stand firm, and tough against those small discouraging voices with the word of God. Lets not let this book of the law depart from our mouths. Please give me some advice.
(ZIMBABWE) I have been married for 4 years, and my marriage was the rough marriage one could ever think of. My husband cheated on me several times and to make matters worse none of my inlaws like me. In fact they always told my husband to divorce me. They always looked at my faults intending to make us separate.
Unfortunately, my husband lost his job and things became worse. He moved to his parents home and that’s how we separated. Things were tough at that time as I was in debt and could not afford to rent an apartment for us and the kids so I also moved to my parent’s home. I started praying that I didn’t want this separation and at that time he began to tell me that he didnt want this marriage anymore because of our differences (fighting a lot). He kept on insisting that he never wanted anything to do with me. And he also got influence from his mother and sisters who from the start were against our marriage.
I fasted and prayed to God that I wanted to afford to rent an apartment and restore our marriage back, and yes “BE STILL AND KNOW THAT HE IS GOD.” After some months I got the exact apartment I had prayed for, and I asked him to come. He told me that he will be coming at the end of this month. I’m still praying for protection from evil attachments that he may not fail to come because yes, I am praying for this restoration of my marriage. Sometimes I feel like giving up because he still is rough.
He comes to see his children. We do kiss but we don’t share any laughter or jokes. I sent him a message asking him if we were still married so that I know and he replied back that he will be coming to stay with me end of this month. But I am praying to God to give me strength and for him to make him a better husband. I am sacrifing a lot to restore this marriage but at the same time I’m so scared to live to regret, after I would have sacrifice this much because his mother doesn’t like me at all. Please pray for me that I wont lose hope in this man, that I won’t lose faith. I love my husband and my children love him so much.
(USA) First let me start with God is great all the time. My wife and I have had marriage problems because I lost faith in God, but I’m renewed now and it has been a few months and I feel as if everything I try to do drives her further away. I love her very much and I know that this didn’t happen overnight and it won’t be fixed overnight. I just need some advice I pray all the time wanting to be a better husband and father but I don’t know if she can ever forgive me. Just please pray for me and my family thank you and God bless.
(INDIA) I loved a girl for 5 years and finally we married in a civil ceremony. When her parents came to know, from that day I haven’t been with my wife and now they filed a divorce case in court. Please help me!
(USA) We all have to remember when God removes something he does it for a reason. We also have to remember some of these marriages God didn’t put together. We got together with people we discover, without going to God for confirmation. So it’s a man made marriage. That’s what I did 17 yrs ago. God had nothing to do with my marriage. We were unequally yolked so it was doom from the beginning. Today I am about to marry a God fearing man who I love very much and I spend countless hours speaking to God about what to do and when. We have been making so many changes –him and I.
So keep your heads up; keep your faith and always let God lead your life. Also, remember when God removes something it is best for you. Take what you learn and move on. Remember, people come into your life for a REASON, SEASON, OR A LIFETIME. BE BLESS AND HOLD ONTO GOD AS HARD AS YOU CAN BECAUSE HE TRULY LOVES US ALL, AND SO DO I.
(USA) I need prayer for my marriage, my husband says that he can’t keep going with this… That he’s unhappy, angry and depressed. And that he can’t believe me anymore that I would change. I can’t let my marriage go down the drain. So I ask for prayer that God will change his thinking… and that we can become a happy married couple.
(TOGO) Claudia, I am not good in English but I just want to tell you that nothing is impossible with GOD. Remember that prayer changes things, persons, situations, relationships, …and the list goes on. GOD IS AWESOME.
(USA) Hi, I’m Laura and I’ve been having problems in my marriage. My husband moved out a few days ago but in my heart its been for a few months. He became quiet and different, like a stranger. I never knew it was this serious. He started chilling out with his friends a lot more and came home without wanting me. I saw changes progress negatively.
I love him with all my heart, I won’t let go. I believe in Christ. I know this is in his hands. I have faith but it’s not solid because I keep breaking down. I know Jesus hears me cry out. I know God Is Love! Help me please. I keep falling to my knees everyday. I keep trying with my husband. He continues to say he doesn’t love me… that he lost all love for me. Please pray over us, please help me Jesus, please. I beg you. I was married in your name. I love you I believe you are the key. Thank you.
(USA) Hi Laura, You didn’t say in your post how long you have been married for, but that really doesn’t matter right now. I would have to say that he has done something but doesn’t want to come clean about whatever it is. I have been in a loveless marriage for over ten years. My husband tells me he loves me but stays at work late to avoid me, and ignores me when he is at home except for necessary discussion. I feel the pain you are in. Are you in couseling for yourself? Debbie
(USA) I have been standing for my marriage for a year now and God has done a mighty work. I am not living with my husband yet, but clearly God has renewed his love for me. Prior to us falling apart, our separation was good. We didn’t discuss the deeper issues in our marriage and that bothered me.
We had date nights, were speaking every day, then one Saturday morning my prayer was answered. We had a huge fight about why we were separated to begin with. From that Saturday until now, the phone calls stopped, the date nights came to a halt. My husband wouldn’t take my calls, let alone return them. I fell apart inside wondering if I should have rocked the boat by bringing up our deep issues of lack of intimacy and why, and how I needed space in the marriage. He couldn’t understand why and took it as rejection.
Then, Christmas Eve he called just to relay his love for me. I hadn’t seen him in two months and had only spoken to him sporadically over those two months. But in those two months I decided to just stand still and see the salvation of the Lord. The one scripture that stopped me from calling and bothering him was “Have faith in God.” No amount of whining and begging him or God was going to change anything.
I would have to have faith to move the mountain, not unfruitful, begging and complaining that God was taking so long to move on my behalf. After all, it began to sink into my spirit, it is God’s will for my marriage not to fail. God also put seedtime and harvest into my spirit. There is a time and season for everything under heaven and the healing of my marriage was no different. I had hurt my husband by leaving him and I had/have to deal with his healing.
By pulling back and trusting God, we have begun our date nights once again and are working toward getting back together. He answers my calls and returns them. We don’t argue about our deep issues, but discuss them. My husband still has some issues, but praise God HE is working them out, not us ourselves. Each time I feel anxious about my seedtime and harvest, I tell myself “Have faith in God”. It works. Mountains are moving and it seems me and my husband are on the right track to reconcile any day now. What a blessing this site has been to me and my marriage. -Michele Still Standing
(USA) Lord please I beg you. I have been separated for 6 months now and my heart is completely broken. My husband almost had a affair and is a porn addict. I prayed and tried to forgive him but he made me distrust him so much. I want him to come home. I really do, please GOD you say you will and can convict and save anyone. Lord, please God. Please change the heart of my husband change him God. Break his heart and make him change his mind I do no want a divorce. Please GOD!
(NIGERIA) Please, I need prayer and direction. Lord, come to my aid. I have been married for 2 years. About 6 months ago I returned to my father to let them call it to my husband’s attention to provide for me and our baby. He is a pastor. He claims that there is no place in the Bible that says a man should provide for his family. I pay the rent, feed us, take care of the home, and give him a little monthly money.
I a wanted solution but he told me to remain in my parent’s house till I accept it that he is not to provide. He only sleeps, prays, and goes on evangelism in the evenings. My dad said he should come with his uncles but he refused. He even tells people that I wasnt his kind of woman, that he only saw my salary and married me, thinking I will submit all monthly so he can start up his ministry. I need help and prayers. Lord, do what no man can do for me.
Hilda, This is disturbing, to say the least. Your husband obviously doesn’t know his Bible, and obviously does not have the heart of Christ. A few scriptures that come to mind are: “For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat” 2 Thessalonians 3:10. Also: “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” 1 Timothy 5:8.
Marriage is a living symbol of Christ’s love for the church, with the husband symbolizing Jesus Christ Himself, who cares for his bride. So what your husband is saying by his words, attitude, and actions is, “I will only be a part of your life if you carry me and my needs… I care about you only to the degree that YOU carry me financially and meet MY needs. You are rejected if I have to provide for you.” Hilda, this is so, so sad that he is so narrow-minded in his view of “evangelism” and “ministry.” Honestly, with that attitude, I lovingly, wouldn’t financially support him. You are only enabling horrible behavior. He needs to stop denying “the faith” in the way in which he is living his life, which is “worse than an unbeliever.” You need to seriously pray for him. Let him fall financially and pray that it wakes him up to being a servant leader as Christ was and is. I pray with you that he wakes up spiritually. The damage he will do to kingdom work for those who are looking for hypocrites, is immense.
(NIGERIA) Thanks Cindy for that piece, it was quite helpful. We have not been together for six months now and I haven’t given him anything for 6 months. I am living with my father for now, he told him to bring his uncles to tell them the situation but he refused. God can transform, I pray he transform my husband and unites us. Please pray with me.