How Do You Greet Your Spouse?

We’ve heard it said that with your spouse, it’s important to “pay attention to your rituals of connection at the beginning and the end of the day.” This includes how you greet your spouse. Otherwise, a type of disconnection begins to take place in your marriage.

That goes along with something that relationship experts, Patricia S. and Gregory A. Kuhlman point out:

“When you’re apart, whether just for a portion of the day or for an extended time, how you keep in touch and how you get back together can be more important that how much time you’re separated. Successful couples make sure that their reunion receives some attention.”

The “Greet” Reunions

Are YOUR reunions good ones?

That’s a good question to ask yourself. And while you’re thinking that one over, here’s something to consider that Erin Baxter (from the Mystery32.com web site) writes:

“I’ve heard the advice ‘Make sure you always beat the dog to the door when greeting your spouse!’ Well, we had a dog and I can tell you that’s pretty hard to do. BUT, I like the point of it. Dogs are always so happy and excited to see their owners come home and we love being greeted by our pets. How much more important is it to greet our husbands and wives?

“Try it. Don’t tell your spouse what you’re going to do, just start doing it. As soon as you hear the garage door opening or hear the doorknob turn, stop what you’re doing and go hug the love of your life. It is one of the simplest, but most important things you can do for them each day!”

What a great challenge! I can tell you, from personal experience, that we’ve had several dogs over the course of our marriage. When one of us would go somewhere and then come home the greeting went over the top! One of these dogs was pretty good at knowing when Steve would usually come home for work. At a certain time of the day, she would watch by the front window —sometimes for an hour or so, waiting and watching for Steve to come home.

And when he’d drive up the driveway, you’d think the most important person in the world was about to enter. She was over-the-top happy. Steve would walk in and her tail would be wagging full force. Her attention was fully focused on him. She was completely enthralled with this man. It was quite the welcome home!

Enthusiastically Greeting Our Spouse

A while ago I got to thinking of how happy Steve would be if I greeted him with even a fraction of the enthusiasm as our dogs would greet him. That really changed the way I’ve approached this matter. I may not have a tail to wag, or feel like I can hop all over the place when he comes in. But I can sure do better than grunting a “hi” from the computer and then proceeding on to type.

We had a husband post a comment on this web site a while ago, lamenting on how his wife rarely even looks up from what she’s doing when he comes in the door. He said, “at least the dog is happy to see me. It’s better than nothing.”

I thought as I read that, on how sad that would be if Steve felt the same way. It sure wouldn’t reveal or reflect the love of Christ in how I would be living out my love for him. I think the following challenge, from Fawn Weaver (of the Happy Wives Club), is a good one to consider:

“Treat your spouse like they’re the most important person in the world. Because they are. No one else has pledged their life to you. No other person has committed to be with you through the ups and the downs, the good times and the bad, through wealth and poverty. And no one else experiences your rawest emotions and greatest flaws more than your spouse. That alone has earned them a place above all other human beings on earth.”

“Greet one another with a holy kiss…” (Romans 16:16 and 2 Corinthians 13:12)

Cindy and Steve Wright

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