Money can be a blessing or a curse. It all depends upon the way you approach it. When you manage it well, it can be a blessing. But when you don’t or can’t, it certainly causes a person to want to curse. That’s why it’s good to read money scriptures, to learn how best to manage it. This especially applies to how you use it within your marriage.
When it comes to money and marriage, the blessing and curse issue is applicable, as well. Money issues can bring out the best and it can bring out the worst in us.
Concerning Money Issues:
“Money issues need to be talked about. Many people try to avoid subjects (or really anything) they don’t like or are afraid of. You have to face the giants. If your finances are a mess, you have to face up to the truth. How can you expect to move a mountain that you refuse to admit exists?” (Bob Lotich, from Christianpf.com article, Money and Marriage: 7 Lessons I Have Learned So Far)
Money issues can be mountainous in how they can divide and separate you in your marriage. It takes real teamwork to make your money work FOR you, rather than allow it to work against you and divide you.
In your marriage vows you promised to “love, honor, and cherish” each other, “for better or for worse, for richer or poorer.” But when you said those vows to each other and to God, you may not have fully realized that the “better and worse” of times would truly visit you, and it would cause so many problems. THAT’S one of the many times in your marriage when you need to come together and show teamwork. It isn’t a time when you should turn against each other.
Please realize:
“Money is one of the most common sources of conflict in a marriage. That’s true regardless of whether the couple has only a little money or a lot of money. The problem, Dr Gary Chapman explains, is not the amount of money that a couple has, but their attitude toward money and how they handle it.
“Most people fit into one of two categories when it comes to money. They are either spenders or savers by nature. And people tend to marry their opposite when it comes to attitudes toward money, Chapman says. However, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, if the two can balance each other.” (Belinda Elliott, from CBN.com article, The Marriage You’ve Always Wanted)
And truly, that is what marriage is about so much of the time. It’s a matter of balancing each other and finding ways to work together as a team. This should happen no matter what the issue is, and no matter what it is that can divide you.
That’s why we put this web site together, and why we have posted so many articles concerning finances. As a “cord of three strands” you and your spouse are to work within your marriage, with God. Money issues can be one of the biggest issues, you will have to work through.
So, to help you on this journey, below are a few links, which give scriptures dealing with money. Please read through them, and pray about how you can live together by the principles God presents in them. As the Bible says in Psalm 119:105, God’s Word can be a “lamp” to your feet and a “light” to your path.
May it be so, as you read:
• 250 Bible Verses About Money
• Personal Finance Bible Verses (1,196 of them)
• 100 Bible Verses About Money Problems
It’s important to keep in mind something that Ron Blue stated in his book, Master Your Money:
“Every spending decision is a spiritual decision. There is nothing more spiritual than buying a car, taking a vacation, buying food, paying off debt, paying taxes, and so on. These are all uses of His resources. He owns all that I have … The Bible reveals many specific guidelines as to how the Owner wants His property used. As a steward, I have a great deal of latitude, but I am still responsible to the Owner. Someday I will give an accounting of how I used His property.”
We will all reach that place someday. It’s important that we deal with our finances in a way that the Lord would want us. To learn more, please read this Family Life Today article:
• HOW DO WE DEAL WITH FINANCIAL DIFFICULTIES
If you need additional help after reading the scriptures and article above, we encourage you to read other articles, Quotes, Testimonies, and Recommended Resources posted in the Finances in Marriage topic.
In Closing
Gary Thomas (in his article, “What Jesus Mentions About Managing Your Money in Marriage Will Surprise You”) points out the following that’s important to note concerning marriage and money:
“The Bible speaks favorably of sensible saving (Genesis 41; Proverbs 21:20; Ecclesiastes 11:12) but even more about generous giving (Deuteronomy 15:10; Psalm 112:5; Proverbs 22:9; Malachi 3:10; 2 Corinthians 9:6-10). It seems to suggest that managing your money is a wise thing to do (Proverbs 27:23-27) and exalts hard work over laziness (2 Thessalonians 3:10; Proverbs 24:33-34). It also suggests that wanting to leave an inheritance behind is a good thing (1 Timothy 5:8; Proverbs 13:22).
“All these together suggest that managing your money in a God-honoring way will bless you and nurture your marriage, while ignoring Scriptural truths about handling money may bring much misery, frustration, and pain into your life and marriage. Not thinking about the best ways to manage your money will likely lead you to the default position of mishandling your money.”
And to that we say, Amen!
Cindy Wright of Marriage Missions International wrote this article.
It would be especially helpful if you would add additional tips and/or comments below to help others. Please “Join the Discussion” and we will all benefit, as a result.
Filed under: Finances in Marriage
(US) My future husband is a millionaire but still wants me to contribute with my whole salary. I have a problem with that. He is Catholic & I am Baptist. Is he not supposed to be the provider?? Or do we sit & discuss & compromise??
(USA) What is his stated rationale for this? On the surface it seems odd that one would expect their spouse to contribute financially to support them, but be hesitant to contribute herself.
I took care of all the money and budgets for the first 17 years we were together but when I asked my husband to start taking care of this for our family, his reaction was to start his own bank account (which I have absolutely no access to), splitting the bills up and giving me my list of bills to begin paying.
Since this occured our marriage has been struggling. The fact is that we work two different shifts; he works 7:00 am – various times Monday through Friday while I work 7:00 pm – 7:00 am swing shifts (I work 3 days one week; Sun, Wed, & Thurs; then 4 days the next Mon, Tues, Fri, Sat). So we only have 2 days every other week that we are off work on the same days. I have been on this shift for the past 5 years and it is a very physically demanding job and I have been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. I have really bad problems with pain in my legs and has spread to my shoulders. Medication is helping but is very expensive. So money once again is back in the spotlight. He resents my need for medication because he refuses to taking anything besides his $4 blood pressure meds.
We even split up for a week not too long ago and to be honest I wasn’t real sure we were ready to get back together yet but I’m determined to somehow save my marriage. I love him but don’t know how to handle this big black cloud called money that is looming over my marriage.
Thank you for choosing to fight for your marriage. Call unto the Lord, step out and let Him be seen in your marriage. Show love to your husband, let nothing change that would worsen the matter. You never know, you might win him back again 1st Peter 3:1. Together in prayers.
My husband and I struggle with money issues and it creates the biggest and worst arguments in our marriage. He tells me I have an addiction with credit cards because he believe in only cash transactions where I find credit card use a convenience. I feel that we are financially stable – we pay our bills on time, have substantial savings and retirement funds; we vacation, our debt is manageable and we are not financially constrained. I feel that it’s never enough for him and that his need for having more and more is a way of filling the emptiness inside or insecurities from lack of love and attention in his childhood. Our savings has grown and tripled in the last year, but there is always a complaint about how much we have and how we need to strive for more. It is very hard to have a peaceful conversation about our different views, I feel that it’s his way or the highway and he is not open to listening or rationalizing with me. I appreciate any advice.