I Don’t Even Like Him—How Can I Pray for Him?
Have you ever been so mad at your husband that the last thing you wanted to do was pray for him? So have I. It’s hard to pray for someone when you’re angry or he’s hurt you.
But that’s exactly what God wants us to do. If He asks us to pray for our enemies, how much more should we be praying for the person with whom we have become one and are supposed to love? But how do we get past the unforgiveness and critical attitude?
Honest with God
The first thing to do is be completely honest with God. In order to break down the walls in our hearts and smash the barriers that stop communication, we have to be totally up front with the Lord about our feelings. We don’t have to “pretty it up” for Him. He already knows the truth. He just wants to see if we’re willing to admit it and confess it as disobedience to His ways. If so, He then has a heart with which He can work.
Power of Praying Wife
If you’re angry at your husband, tell God. Don’t let it become a cancer that grows with each passing day. Don’t say, “I’m going to live my life and let him live his.” There’s a price to pay when we act entirely independently of one another. “Neither is man independent of woman, nor woman independent of man, in the Lord” (1 Corinthians 11:11).
Instead say:
“Lord, nothing in me wants to pray for this man. I confess my anger, hurt, unforgiveness, disappointment, resentment, and hardness of heart toward him. Forgive me and create in me a clean heart and right spirit before You. Give me a new, positive, joyful, loving, forgiving attitude toward him. Where he has erred, reveal it to him and convict his heart about it. Lead him through the paths of repentance and deliverance. Help me not to hold myself apart from him emotionally, mentally, or physically because of unforgiveness. Where either of us needs to ask forgiveness of the other, help us to do so.
If there is something I’m not seeing that’s adding to this problem, reveal it to me and help me to understand it. Remove any wedge of confusion that has created misunderstanding or miscommunication. Where there is behavior that needs to change in either of us, I pray You would enable that change to happen. As much as I want to hang on to my anger toward him because I feel it’s justified, I want to do what You want. I release all those feelings to You. Give me a renewed sense of love for him and words to heal this situation.”
A Challenge
If you feel you’re able, try this little experiment and see what happens. Pray for your husband every day for a month using each one of the 30 areas of prayer I’ve included in this book. Pray a chapter a day. Ask God to pour out His blessings on him and fill you both with His love. See if your heart doesn’t soften toward him. Notice if his attitude toward you doesn’t change as well. Observe whether your relationship isn’t running more smoothly.
If you have trouble making that kind of prayer commitment, think of it from the Lord’s perspective. Seeing your husband through God’s eyes—not just as your husband, but as God’s child, a son whom the Lord loves —can be a great revelation. If someone called and asked you to pray for his or her son, you would do it, wouldn’t you? Well, God is asking.
There is a time for everything, as it says in the Bible. That’s never more true than in marriage, especially when it comes to the words we say. There is a time to speak and a time not to speak, and happy is the man whose wife can discern between the two.
Pray Rather Than Say
Anyone who has been married for any length of time realizes that there are things that are better left unsaid. A wife has the ability to hurt her husband more deeply than anyone else can, and he can do the same to her. No matter how much apology, the words cannot be erased. They can only be forgiven and that’s not always easy. Sometimes anything we say will only hinder the flow of what God wants to do, so it’s best to, well, shut up and pray.
This is an excerpt from, The Power of a Praying® Wife
— TO HELP YOUR FURTHER —
Below are linked articles to read to guide you to pray for your husband in different ways than you might have otherwise thought:
• 10 Things Praying for Your Husband Does for You (the Wife)
• 30 Days of Praying for Your Husband
Filed under: For Married Women Spiritual Matters
(SA) Hi All, I logged onto the site because I wanted to write what I am going through, but after I read all of yours, I got thinking… I have so much to be grateful for. I have a hubby who doesn’t beat me, he doesn’t drink (other than an occasional drink), he doesn’t abuse me verbally or emotionally. He does love me, and he shows that he cares. The only thing that is does do is, he loves women. He likes to flirt with them, chat to them on the phone, on line, and meet them in secret and he has … with them once in a while.
We discuss everything, from our bills to the dogs, the kids, the cars etc, but other women is one thing we don’t talk about. We have …. at least once a week, which is never boring or predictable. It’s good and healthy. But, no matter how much I have prayed about this, God has not taken the situation away, so to speak. I have begged, and pleaded and trusted and had faith that God would heal my hubby from this, but not yet.
I am still waiting for healing from God for hubby. Please pray with me that I will keep strong in my faith and keep believing that God will reverse this situation. God is in control and I should be telling this storm how big my GOD is and stop telling GOD how big the storm is.
Today I am just feeling a little down and could just do with a little love and attention.
Lynn, my prayers will be with you. I feel that God will lead down this path, should you LISTEN to what HE is telling you. God is ALMIGHTY!
(CANADA) Hi Sue, it’s been a long time. It’s nice to hear from you. I’m sorry that you’re still going through the same issues. My heart ached for you, but like you said, God is in control. I just wanted to give you a Bible verse: DEUTERONOMY 31:6-8. God loves you so much and He can see all your heartache. Keep praying and ask God to truly guide you in this journey. If you can, get the book by PAMELA HINES: A WIFE’S PRAYER. It’s good and the prayers are more of answers than the problem.
God spoke to me last year to buy the book but I never did. Every time I saw it I kept on thinking I already have the power of a praying wife so I don’t need another book. I finally got it and the moment I started reading it, I had this overwhelming feeling that I’ll be learning a lot from it and God will do wonders.
Hopefully you can get it because to change the prayers from praying for the problem, to praying the answer, takes a lot of faith. And I think for me, that’s what God wants me to truly learn and have, coz I’ve been praying daily for God to give me faith that can move mountains. Keep up the faith. You’ve been so patient and God sees that. My prayers are with you. Lynne and LT, how you doing? My prayers are with you both.
(USA) Good Afternoon Ladies, I am just having a bad day today. I got a letter from my husband this week and it was disappointing. It was all about him, and he didn’t even ask about our son. He said that things were going good and that he was getting back into sports again, and making new brothers in Christ. I am extremely upset because I am out here struggling just to get by and he’s up in the Rehab on vacation. He’s playing sports and things are going really good there. That is not right.
He commits adultery and has addiction problems and he gets to have a good time while I suffer trying to take care our child by myself. Life has been so hard lately in every way; financially, emotionally, physically. I am just about to break trying to keep up on everything and he is off at this rehab having a grand old time. It’s just about enough to make me flip. Please pray for me because I am hot right now. Love ya, ladies.
Love, Lynne
(Canada) Hi Lynne. Sorry I haven’t replied to your post. My heart truly aches for you. I don’t know what I can say to make you feel better but know that I’ve been praying for you so hard.
I’m just gonna ask you to read Psalms 23 and Psalms 139. God is your shepherd and He can see your pain and struggles. He’s teaching you things now and the best thing is to listen and be patient as He works miracles in your life and your husband’s. He knew you were gonna go through this and He knows all your desires.
Everyday forgive your husband. I think he might be embarrassed or he feels bad coz he’s let you and your son down and maybe that’s why he didn’t ask about him. Pray for him daily and don’t give up on yourself and your marriage. I love you gal. I hope to read from you soon. God has your future and your son’s future in the palms of His hand trust in Him.
(USA) Anne, Thank you so much for the prayers and the wonderful verses. I really enjoyed reading them. Lately life has been hard. My son has been sick and is now going to see a specialist for getting tubes in his ears. Thankfully however, he did sleep through the night last night. I don’t think I am really mad at my husband anymore but I feel like my heart has turned cold toward him. I care for him in general but I don’t love him. He’s done nothing except hurt me since we got married and I guess this was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. I am going to see him at the rehab on Sat. and I am going to ask him for a divorce. My heart just can’t take this anymore and I am so tried of being miserable. I really appreciate everyone’s prayers and advice. Hope everyone has a blessed day. Love, Lynne
(SOUTH AFRICA) Hi Girls. I have been going through all of your posts and have been praying for all of you. Lynne, Anne, Sue and Leonie you have been especially in my heart because I have been following your posts for some time.
Anne I am so encouraged by what the Living God has done in your life and in your marriage. I continue to pray for you and your hubby daily, asking and trusting God to continue covering your marriage and that He may open a door for you to minister to others in the same situation because as 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 says: God comforts us in all our tribulations that with the same comfort we have received we may also comfort others faced with similar afflictions.
Lynne, I am sad that this is what it has all come to. I pray that the God of Hope will cause you to abound much in peace and joy and that you will be blessed with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit (Romans 15:13). I do not judge you for your decision, God knows this has been a hard road, but I continue to pray that God will be glorified through your marriage, that God will pick up the pen and write pages of peace, love, joy, forgiveness and harmony in your love story. It is not over until God says its over.
Clearly you are spent of strength, you are exhausted and tired and our Father understands that. And so I charge God to now make His strength perfect now that yours is gone. I pray for you like my own sister, I cry for you and pray that you will soon hear songs of gladness and shouts of joy will be heard from your temple.
Leonie, I carry your burdens with me everyday, since I started reading your posts. I see you are not posting much, but maybe it’s an access issue. I carry you in my prayers, the God of the fatherless and the widow will soon show Himself bountiful in mercy and grace towards you. I declare Isaiah 54 over you.
Sue, I stand with you in prayers for your husband. I bless you with Isaiah 45, read it for your husband, pray it over him everyday. You will surely see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living (Psalm 27:13) for God is the rewarder of all who diligently seek Him.
Lastly " Therefore we do not lose heart. even though the outward man is perishing, yet the inner man is being renewed day by day. For these light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal Glory that far outweighs them. And so we do not look at what is seen, but at the things which are unseen. For what is seen is only temporary, yet what is unseen is eternal" 2 Corinthians 4:6-18.
I love you guys. I praise the Lord for the couple who started this ministry. I’ve been blessed much by it.
As for me, I have recently been instructed by the Lord to lay down my engagement, because of rebelliousness and disobedience on both our parts with my fiance. I have finally obeyed, I have laid it down (broken up with him) in obedience and am now focusing on praying for us and seeking God’s good, pleasing and perfect will. I long for the Glory of the Lord, I know that our present suffering cannot be compared to the glory that will be revealed in us (Romans 8:18).
My partner is pretty cut up about it, but I pray for him, that God will show him what he has shown me, it’s better we lay this down now as Moses laid down his stick/staff, only to pick it up when God instructed him and by then it was no longer an ordinary stick, it was a miracle performing, God glorifying instrument used to set the captives free and to declare the year of the Lord’s favor. I am practicing the faith of Abraham when he laid Isaac down in obedience and by faith.
Pray that I will be faithful to lay this down and allow God to re-write our Love story to His Glory. God bless, Bazalwane (means Christians in Zulu).
(USA) Mangwane, God Bless you and your fiance. I pray that God blesses your love and that you both can come together in HIM and build a marriage that stands firm on HIM. Your words are encouraging to me thank you so much for them. I really enjoy the way you speak. I know that you must be a vessel by they way you comfort. Well, I have to work this Saturday so I am not going to be able to see my husband until Sunday, and I don’t think I am going to go. So I won’t be able to ask for a divorce yet. Maybe there is a reason. God is filling me with hope for a better life. He is providing for me and blessing me in ways that were hard to see before. Thank you so much for your post. I will be in prayer for you and your fiance. Love ya. Love, LYNNE
(USA) Hi, I want to address both Mangwane and Lynne. Mangwane, I agree with Lynne. You are a dear, dear person who is blessed with a gift of encouragement and grace. Thanks so much for praying for people you haven’t even met and loving them in the Lord. Your tender heart comes through. I encourage you to seek God’s will concerning your situation with this man. If you can’t both go with God and build a life that is pleasing to Him, then as painful as it is, you must release having a married future together.
It’s painful now, but it would be more painful later, plus kingdom work will be damaged as well. I love your heart and pray you will have the discernment and strength to do what is best in the light of being a follower of Christ.
Lynne, I’ve been praying for you and loving you from afar. I can well understand why you are hurting as you are. What woman wouldn’t? I pray you will find healthy ways to release the poison of bitterness and hurt and disillusionment that is building up inside of you. I can tell you are working through your feelings and I encourage you to keep up the good work. I’m proud of you.
As far as asking for a divorce right now… why? Why not let God do His work in your husband in this rehab center and see what happens? God may unleash feelings he’s had within him that he didn’t even know he had, and help him to see the wrong he has committed and will help him to be the faithful person He created him to be. If not… then look at options at that point. He’s in process right now of doing the work he needs to do. If he doesn’t change when he is released, then do what you think God would have you do.
I am praying for you Lynne, that God will give you help and hope. Steve and I have been going through some horrific trials with our prodigal sons lately and I’ve just about wanted to “divorce” them as well because of the pain. But God has shown us that they are living out their testimony and that we have to stop allowing ourselves to feel like victims. That won’t help anyone. If they want to reject us, then we have to lovingly allow them the freedom to do so. In the meantime we will continue to love and pray for them from afar while we invest our energies in ministry, friends and other family members that God brings our way. Prayerfully our sons will wake up. If not… how sad for all. But we can’t MAKE them do what they determine they won’t.
I say all of this to encourage you to ask God to help you to do what you need to do right now for your own healing and to help your son. Pray for your husband and extend the love of Christ to him. If he comes out of rehab a better person, a more committed Christian, husband and Father… WONDERFUL!!! If not, then pray about the next step you are to take. But lean upon the Lord to guide you. Be careful because your raw feelings can cause trouble.
You are a wonderful woman of God, a great wife and mother and friend. I know this with all my heart. Don’t allow yourself to act any other way. Grab onto what God has for you. Don’t allow the enemy of our faith to press you into victim mentality. Nothing is happening to you that God isn’t allowing for some reason. He must trust you that you will do the right thing and will come out stronger and a better person in the long run. This may also be the opportunity God is giving you to heal your family and help you to become healthier and more sensitive to each other’s needs. Go with God.
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders us and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart” (Hebrews 12:1-3). My love and prayers are with you.
(CANADA) Hi Mangwane nice to meet you. Thank you so much for your prayers and your powerful message. While I was reading it I was just crying because we had had a major fight with my hubby and I was feeling awful and your message was a reminder of what God has done for me and many others and I just started to pray and I’ve worshiped and I feel better. My prayers are with you too and I commend you for obeying God and He will bless you for that.
Lynne, I’m so glad that you’re not going to see your hubby on Saturday about the divorce. When I read what you had decided to do my heart crashed and I didn’t know what to write. What I wanna tell you is I agree with Cindy. Before you ask your husband for a divorce let God do miracles in your life and marriage. How many times has God been patient with you? He is a patient God and I think He deserves the same from you (and all of us). Wait on Him to restore your marriage and to bring You closer to Him and to also bring your husband closer to Him.
God’s timing is always perfect. Remember the devil is the father of all lies and there’s more he’d love to see than your marriage fall apart. Resist him. Your husband is God’s creation too and He loves him just as much as He loves you. Let Him work on both of you; just pray for patience and wisdom.
God works in ways we cannot see. Read Isaiah 40:28-31 and keep that in your heart and when you feel like giving up remember it. (That’s for me too coz I need patience with things that I’m praying for myself and for my husband so keep me in your prayers too.)
One more thing…I would love it if you listened to DON MOEN’S song called HE NEVER SLEEPS. You can get it on youtube.com if you don’t have it and it has the lyrics and you can really feel those words because God never sleeps at all. He loves you and your husband and your son that much.
Love you gal and my prayers are with you. Mangwane, hope to hear from you soon and my prayers are with you too. Love you all.
(SOUTH AFRICA) Hi Everyone, Thank you so much to all of your for your encouraging responses. Lynne, I commend you for allowing the possibility that indeed God is still at work in your marriage. I agree with Cindy and Anne, the Lord works best when we are still. I have been blessed by James 1:2-4, but especially the part that says "Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything".
Hence some trials will come back again and again. The devil also likes to continue the same question he asked in Eden in order to steal what belonged to Adam and Eve "did God really say…". With every promise given to us, the devil will ask that question again and again, even and especially after we have seen God at work in the area where God has made a covenant with us. Circumstances, trials rise up to question "did God really say…". Each time the devil bets that we are finally going to say "no, He didn’t, I must have imagined that God promised restoration [of my marriage, finances, health etc]".
So we are encouraged by scripture to submit ourselves to God, resist the devil and he will flee from us eventually (when he realizes that each time the response we give to his doubting Thomas questions is consistent with what God has promised us). Turn neither to the left nor to the right Lynne, as tough as it is.
Also, what comforts me most about where you are at right now is that God is aware of your emotional exhaustion with this issue and so His power is demonstrated best during this time when you are weak, because being weak means you have an opportunity to be still and know that He is God. You have an opportunity to see Him at work all on His own without assistance from anyone, without your interference, basically you have an opportunity to see His "God-ness" displayed in its splendor!
If we but trust Him and give Him our tiredness, our fed-upness, and yet continue to pledge obedience and faith in Him, we release Him to do what no eye has seen, no ear has heard and no mind has conceived.
I continue to lift you up daily, I am so excited about what the Lord is doing in your life and what is to be revealed as you hang in there.
Cindy, you have spoken like a mother (my God fearing late mom would have said the exact words you have said to me about this situation!). I submit to your counsel for it is the counsel the Holy Spirit has given me. In this time God has birthed in me the desire to see His Glory in my life, far more than anything else, far more than the wedding day, far more than the companionship. I desire to see the Glory of God make manifest in my life and that means laying it all down again, dying to myself, to my desires, to my plans, to my way.
I continue to covet your prayers because as you know, some days are easier than others (Valentine’s day was horrible!!!!! my ex was crying for my attention all day and saying no to him, and yes to the Lord was hard). I continue to trust that I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living even in this and that when perseverance has done its perfect work I will come forth as gold (Job 23:10). Pray for him too, he is also a born again man of God, but he is such a "do-er" rather than a "wait-er" or a seeker.
Anne, thank you for your encouragement!! I am so excited to hear from you. The devil is a liar. Do not be moved, do not be shaken, what God has given you shall not be taken away. He is not a man that He should lie nor a human being that He should change His mind. I am reminded of Psalm 46:5 "God is in her midst, she will not be moved. Her God will help her just at the break of dawn". I continue to pray for you as well.
I am so blessed by you all. I am so glad for the trial God has worked in my relationship to bring me to this point of knowing such amazing women. Be blessed.
(SA) Hi everyone and welcome to Mangwane, and thanks for your message of encouragement to all of us. Praise HIS wonderful name that there are people like you and the others here, whom we can speak to, and who can pray with us. For we should encourage and support each other through our prayers.
For sometime, as you all know, my hubby, has in the past and still is, unfaithful (during the day only) and on the internet etc, and I know that according to Bible I can divorce him. But you know what, and this was a thought that has been in my mind for the last few days, I can’t divorce him. God wants to use him. (I’m not sure for what, but HE does.)
This is probably why I haven’t done anything in that direction, as I truly feel that I have to keep praying for our marriage. I need to forgive him as GOD forgives me, totally and completely. Have any of you thought what it truly means to forgive someone? Think about this carefully… forgive as Jesus would.
Last night when I couldn’t sleep and I was crying out to our Heavenly Father. This laid very heavy on my heart. (I’m just writing as the words come – so if some of it doesn’t make sense then … sorry.)
My hubby said something to me last night, and it really hurt me. I couldn’t help but ask the Lord to please show me how to forgive him, for his words and his deeds. God is a wonderful God, and last night as I was crying silently in bed, I just suddenly felt HIS presence and the peace and calm love of HIS love. Yet, there are times when I ask why Lord, why? And when Lord, when are things going to change? And other days I thank HIM for the changes that are going to take place in our lives, both our lives. And some days the devil just gets the better of me and my emotions and my thoughts, and then I have to ask GOD for HIS forgiveness and peace.
Lynne how you doing? You hang in there, the Lord has a purpose and HE needs to you hang on and wait for HIM. Take care and much love to you all. God bless you all.
(USA) Good Afternoon Ladies, Thank you all for your encouragement. It’s been wonderful. The good news is that I have not asked my husband for a divorce. I went to visit him on Sunday instead of Sat. because I had to work on Sat. We ended up fighting for the first hour and my husband said that he was not sure if God actually brought us together. Then he apologized and said that his flesh was getting the best of him because I told him that I had considered getting a divorce, and he hates the word divorce. So it made him defensive.
The second hour of our visit went really well. My husband asked if he could pray over our meeting before the fight even started and I believe that the Lord is the reason that the visit turned around. We started talking about our son and the new baby coming. Then my husband told me about how he helped another guy there out to get adjusted. The other guy has been unfaithful to his wife a lot and she doesn’t know. My husband told him to be honest with his wife and suggested that they (my husband and the other guy) be accountability partners. At this point I started to get tingles and I almost felt like asking "who are you and what have you done with my husband?"
Then my husband told me that he wants to start a ministry for men that have the same issues that he does. I was so shocked. I encouraged him right away to listen if the Lord is calling him to do something, and I feel that the Lord called me to stop thinking about divorce at that moment.
So we are going to work on our marriage though letters and visits while my husband works on himself at the rehab. Then as the visit came to an end my husband walked us out to the car and we actually kissed goodbye. I don’t know what came over us but he hugged me and as we pulled away from the hug we kissed! I thought I would never be able to kiss him again without thinking about what happened but I did. The kiss felt good and right and the only thing on my mind was us.
God is bigger than any problem and I know this but I know that this road is not going to be easy and the pain is far from gone, but now I am actually willing to try.
Sue, I am going to be praying for you and your marriage. I will also be praying that your husband finds the Lord. Anne, Cindy, Mangwane, Thank you so much for the awesome advice. I read it a few days ago but I didn’t respond because I wanted to think about what you all said for a while and let it sink in. I am glad I did because I probably would have just made excuses otherwise. I thank the Lord for you ladies and pray for you all often.
How is everyone else doing? Cindy are things better with your sons? I am praying for them and you. Anne, is everything going well with you? I wasn’t sure what you were asking prayers for so I just prayed that the Lord would give you what you need because He knows your needs. LT, How’s the baby and the marriage? Mangwane, my prayers are with you and your relationship now that it can be what the Lord wants it to be. Love ya all, Lynne
(CANADA) Hey Lynne, sorry I didn’t reply earlier. You have no idea how happy I was to read your post. God is truly faithful. I was so happy I teared up. Like it says in Psalms 34:17-19, God always hears our cries we just have to be really patient. It’s not going to be an easy journey and the enemy will be working hard to make you doubt your decision but stand firm. Read Ephesians 6:10-18 The Armor of God. Pray for patience and wisdom for yourself.
I continually pray for your husband to obey God and to follow in the path He has for him. I also pray for his new friend that he may be of good influence and God shall use them to help each other and stand firm and flee from the enemy. Remember that God never wastes a crisis and He’s not gonna waste yours as you can see already. Love you gal.
(SA) Hi Everyone. Lynne: Praise the Lord for what He did during your visit with your husband and for what He continues to do in both your hearts. Reading your post I wanted a song of praise sung in our church that says: We bless your Name, Almighty God, Qhawe la ma Qhawe (Conqueror of Conquerors). He is victorious in battle, mighty and powerful to save and to rescue. We continue to pray anticipating God’s Glory that far outweighs all the pain and hurt that you have experienced in your marriage. The latter will be greater than the rest. I bless you with Joel 2:23-27:
" Rejoice in the LORD your God,
for he has given you
the autumn rains in righteousness.
He sends you abundant showers,
both autumn and spring rains, as before.
24 The threshing floors will be filled with grain;
the vats will overflow with new wine and oil.
25 "I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten—
the great locust and the young locust,
the other locusts and the locust swarm
my great army that I sent among you.
26 You will have plenty to eat, until you are full,
and you will praise the name of the LORD your God,
who has worked wonders for you;
never again will my people be shamed.
27 Then you will know that I am in Israel,
that I am the LORD your God,
and that there is no other;
never again will my people be shamed.
Sue: I keep you in my prayers. I praise the Lord for His garment of Praise. He surely exchange your ashes for a crown of beauty.
Anne: How are you? I think and pray for you often, (it’s as if I know you from somewhere -quite strange eh?).
LT: I pray for you as well. I haven’t heard from you in a long while now. I pray you are ok. Love always, Mangwane
(CANADA) Hi all. Hope you’re all doing well. I’m doing fine. I just wanted to share what I’ve been going through (nothing bad) and would love your support through prayer. For a long time I’ve been having the desire to truly get closer to God but everytime the devil managed to sway me away from that and unfortunately succeed.
I’ve had a lot of negative emotions and thoughts in me because of my childhood. I grew up with a lot of emotional abuse from my dad and always thought of myself in a negative way. Thank God because after so many years of always having these negative thoughts, God wanted to set me free.
I saw our pastor and he advised me to get a guide book that helps me week by week to be honest with myself. It was hard but I let go of a lot of stuff but the enemy definitely replayed so many things and I fell off again and it sucked. I stopped praying and it just wasn’t right.
Once again God called me up and I’ve been praying and my desire grew stronger. Anyway, I’ve had a desire to also read the Word and obey what it says and I’ve been praying a lot. One day last week as I was praying, all of a sudden I opened my eyes and got my Bible and opened Joshua 1;8-9. That’s what God wanted me to know and do –to read His word and not to worry about anything coz He’s with me. It felt good coz all along my greatest fear is what if I don’t hear God speaking to me coz most times I pray, get up, run around and go to work. I decided to set my alarm and wake up earlier and have more time. So please pray that I may be disciplined with that.
We’ve been going through some financial difficulties and have to be on a strict budget. Every time I’d think about money I’d get so anxious. God spoke to me again with 1 Timothy 6:17 that my hope should come from God. I do feel more content now and more on solid ground now that I’m seeking Him more each day.
My prayer request is that you pray that I may be able to obey God and for me to hear Him and to have the faith that can move mountains. And also pray that we may be able to tithe what we ought despite our budget and to truly find my hope from God. Pray for my husband too, and thank God that he knows Him and believes in prayer, but also to have the desire to know him personally and to read his word (he doesn’t read the Bible). I do pray about it and I know it will happen in God’s timing.
I have a lot that I pray about, especially when it comes to my role as a wife and now I want to grow more in God. If anyone has any advice or even Bible study books that I could use I’d really appreciate it. I’m now reading When women say YES to God by Lysa Terkeurst. It’s good.
This has been a journey and unfortunately I’ve fallen into the enemy’s trap and moved away from God. But God has been faithful and patient with me. Please pray for me to have the strength and wisdom to truly be the woman God is calling me to be. I’m yet to know what that is. God has been faithful because my thoughts are not as negative and I can shake off any thoughts with prayer. It hasn’t been easy and I still have to learn a lot but it’s easier than before.
I read a book called Let It Go by Tony Evans: Breaking from Fear and Anxiety, and it really helped and showed me how the enemy has been replaying things in my mind over and over for so many years. I am just glad God loves me so much that He wants to set me completely free.
Thank you all so much and may God bless you. Lynne, how you doing? I’ve been praying for you and your husband and also the new friend that he found. God’s Blessings. Mangwane, thank you so much for keeping me in your prayers you’re also in my prayers and you never know, we might meet someday. God brings people together in ways we can’t fathom. Love you all.