Dr Kevin Leman often says that five of the most dreaded words a husband hates to hear is, “Honey, we need to talk…” Do you find that to be true?
Watch this You Tube video with Dr Leman and then read the marriage tips below. They are good ones to consider when you want to bring up those five dreaded words.
We Need to Talk?
Here are a few additional points that goes along with the things that Dr Leman discussed in this You Tube video on the subject of: “Honey, We Need to Talk”:
• “Marriage will require you to learn how to communicate. Like to talk? Don’t like to talk? Well, it doesn’t really matter. No matter what your communication bent, marriage will force you to bring your insides out. It will require you to take a good hard look at your opinions, beliefs, ideas, and feelings and share them with another. It will cause you to answer the hard questions, and speak the difficult truths, because communication is the lifeline between two people. There’s no way around it. It will cause you to take responsibility for not just what you say, but how you say it—tone, body language, sarcasm and all.” (Debra Fileta)
Also note that when mind reading is taken out of the marriage as an expected form of communication, spouses and families are spared a whole lot of unnecessary frustrations. There is too much time and energy being wasted on hinting, hoping, assuming, guessing, misinterpreting, and misreading instead of asking or telling what is or isn’t wanted and expected in simple, clear ways.
• “Don’t make assumptions. As author Miguel Angel Ruiz put it, ‘Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama.’ Nothing pushes us to grow quite like marriage when you look at it as an opportunity to learn about the person you love most, and yourself. Assume as little as possible…discover as much as possible.” (Fawn Weaver)
Additionally:
Here are a few links to additional marriage pointers to help you as you glean through them and use what will work for you:
• TO SAY SOMETHING OR NOT: That is the Question
• MEN DON’T TALK (with Dr David E. Clarke)
Lastly:
• HOW CAN I START A DIFFICULT CONVERSATION WITH MY SPOUSE?
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