The following are scriptures and quotes we believe you’ll find helpful for living biblically in your marriage. We pray they will minister to your heart and inspire how you interact in your marriage.
Please Prayerfully Read:
• “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (1 John 4:7-8)
• Love flows through a marriage that lives up to mutual responsibility. “Love is not self seeking; it’s not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrong.” (1 Corinthians 13:5 )
• Foundation Verse for Marriage: “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” (Hebrews 10:24) Ask yourself: “How can I encourage him or her?”
• A true demonstration of love: “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for each other.” (1 John 3:16)
• It says in 1 Corinthians 13:7 that love “always protects.” That doesn’t mean love enables, covers over, or makes secret those things that should be brought to the light. But it is being prayerfully careful of when, where, and with whom we share personal details of our married life. To truly love our spouse is to show respect for their feelings. It is not about doing or saying anything that “cuts them down.” By doing so, we show that we don’t value them.
It also tells us in 1 Corinthians 13, “Love is kind.” It “is not self-seeking.” So by embarrassing our spouse, we dishonor not only him or her, but we also dishonor God’s Word. Even if our spouse dishonors us, we aren’t given the permission to retaliate in return. (Cindy Wright)
Additional Scriptures:
• In reading Luke 19:41-44, these verses can also apply to the enormous sadness Christ must feel as He sees “war” rage within marriages. It says, “As Jesus approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it and said, ‘If you, even you, had only known on this day what would bring you peace —but it’s hidden from your eyes. The days will come upon you when your enemies will build an embankment against you and encircle you and hem you in on every side. They will dash you to the ground, you and the children within your walls. They will not leave one stone on another, because you didn’t recognize the time of God’s coming to you.'”
The “enemies” that are described within these verses can be compared to the things we allow to come between us as a couple so we’re no longer living in loving covenant with our spouses. Not only will we be brought down —but also, and most tragically —so will our children.
As Oswald Chambers said, “If I allow any turning away from God in my private life, everyone around me suffers.” All of this is because we don’t recognize Christ’s redemptive ministry. It’s open to all that embrace Him as Savior, AND as Lord, as the foundation upon which our marriages must be built and maintained. It’s enough to make all of heaven weep! (Cindy Wright)
Keep in Mind:
• The apostle Paul said, “In all things, I have learned to be content.” That same statement can be applied to marriage. In 1 Corinthians, we see how Paul addressed many difficult relationship questions. The over-all answer that he seems to give is to “Be content in the situation where God has placed you. If you’re married, don’t seek to be single. If you’re single, don’t seek to be married.
Live God’s way, one day at a time, and he will show you what to do. Both marriage and singleness are gifts from God. One isn’t morally better than the other, and both are valuable to accomplishing God’s purposes. It’s important for us, therefore, to accept our present situation.” (Explanation from “The New Life Application Bible” of 1 Corinthians 7:3-11)
• Don’t isolate yourself, “Let us encourage one another —and all the more as you see the day approaching.” (Hebrews 10:25)
• Apply Hebrews 10:24 that says, “As far as it be within you be at peace with all men.”
• Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21)
Keep in Mind:
• As you weather those marital storms, that we’re warned in 1 Corinthians 7:27-28, that “those who marry will face many troubles in this life.”
• In Ephesians 4:15 Paul challenged Christians to live a life of “speaking the truth in love.” Our tendency is to do well on 50% of that verse. Some of us have mastered “speaking the truth.” We’re quick to point out anything that we see or perceive in our spouse and are willing to use any method (attacking, judging, etc.) to drive the point home. Others of us are stuck at the “in love” part of confrontation. We’ve come to believe in complete acceptance and tolerance of any behavior.
Often we become paralyzed with a fear of hurting someone’s feelings and withdraw into passivity and silence. Speaking the truth in love combines both of these concepts to allow us to confront sinful behavior without compromise, yet with absolute care and respect for the individual, saying things in a way that the person can accept. When a couple takes the stance of living out Paul’s challenge of “speaking the truth in love” to each other, the old models of judging and passivity must disappear. (Jeff and Lora Helton)
Please Know:
• The principles for living written in the Bible are the principles for loving in our marriages. (Cindy Wright)
• Be a difference maker. Give to your spouse, the grace that you would want from him and that you want the Lord to give you. Keep in mind these words, “He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” (Micah 6:8)
Pay head to the words written in Isaiah 1:17, “Stop doing wrong, learn to do right!” 1 John 3:16 says, “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.”
• Guard yourself in your spirit, and don’t break faith. (Malachi 2:16)
Mutual Commitment of Submission Among Equals
• Prayerfully read the following based on 1 Corinthians 11:3: “I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.” The commentary for the New Life Application Bible states: “Submission is a key element in the smooth functioning of any business, government, or family. God ordained submission in certain relationships to prevent chaos. It’s essential to understand that submission is not surrender, withdrawal, or apathy. It doesn’t mean inferiority, because God created all people in his image and because all have equal value. Submission is mutual commitment and cooperation.
“Thus God calls for submission among equals. He didn’t make the man superior. He made a way for the man and woman to work together. Jesus Christ, although equal with God the Father, submitted to him to carry out the plan for salvation. Likewise, although equal to man under God, the wife should submit to her husband for the sake of their marriage and family. Submission between equals is submission by choice, not by force. We serve God in these relationships by willingly submitting to others in our church, to our spouses, and to our government leaders.”
In Relationship:
• We are told in Ephesians 5:25-33: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any blemish, but holy and blameless.
“In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church —for we are members of His body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery —but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
The commentary for the New Life Application Bible explains these scriptures in Ephesians 5:25-33: “Paul devotes twice as many words to telling husbands to love their wives as to telling wives to submit to their husbands. How should a man love his wife? (1) He should be willing to sacrifice everything for her. (2) He should make her well-being of primary importance. (3) He should care for her as he cares for his own body. No wife needs to fear submitting to a man who treats her in this way.
To Go With This, Prayerfully Consider:
“The union of husband and wife merges two persons in such a way that little can affect one without also affecting the other. Oneness in marriage doesn’t mean losing your personality in the personality of the other. Instead, it means caring for your spouse as you care for yourself, learning to anticipate his or her needs, helping the other person become all he or she can be. The creation story tells of God’s plan that husband and wife should be one (Genesis 2:24), and Jesus also referred to this plan. (Matthew 19:4-6) (Commentary explanation for Ephesians 5:31-33)
• A very important principle for men to take to heart: “Speaking the truth in love we will in all things grow up into Him who is the head, that is, Christ. From Him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work” (Ephesians 4:15-16)
Coping Situations
• When you’re living in a “coping situation” in your marriage, you need to make sure that you put activities and “helps” into your life that will enable you to build up your energy back up. Living in a “coping situation” can drastically drain you emotionally, physically and spiritually. Therefore, if you deplete your reserve energy without restoring at least part of it back from time to time, you’ll find yourself in a crisis situation eventually.
The Bible tells us that we can “do all things through Him who strengthens us” (Philippians 4:13). But we have to make sure that we don’t neglect to plug into the source of energy so we can do all things.
• Let me ask you, “Are you prayerfully and carefully treating your spouse with the love, honor and respect that God would have you? Are you showing the love of Christ to your spouse?” If not, you may want to pray Psalm 51 with a sincere heart and ask the Lord to show you how to love, honor, and cherish your spouse as you promised in your wedding vows.
• “Fight truth decay —study the Bible daily.”
NEW TESTAMENT MANDATE
This is a review of some of the “one another” verses:
• Be devoted and give preference to one another. (Romans 12:10)
• Accept one another. (Romans 15:7)
• Care for one another. (1 Corinthians 12:25)
• Carry each other’s burdens. (Galatians 6:2)
• Forgive one another. (Ephesians 4:32)
• Encourage, build up one another. (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
• Spur one another on to love and good deeds. (Hebrews 10:24)
• Confess your sins to one another. (James 5:16)
• Pray for one another. (James 5:16)
In Life and Marriage, Remember:
• We’re Christ’s representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God’s work of making things right between them.” (2 Corinthians 5:20 -The Message)
• Watch what God does, and then you do it, like children who learn proper behavior from their parents. Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that. (Ephesians 5:1-2, The Message)
Be on the Alert:
• Beware of these statements, “He is” -or- “she is” -or- “I am” a private person.” PRIVACY CAN EASILY LEAD TO BEHAVIOR THAT GIVES INTO DARKNESS. (See: Proverbs 4:19; 2 Samuel 22:29; Psalm 112:4; Matthew 6:23; and Luke 11:34-36. Also read: John 3:19-21; Romans 1:21; 2 Corinthians 4:6; 2 Corinthians 6:14; Ephesians 4:17-18 and Ephesians 5:8-14. In addition, read: 1 Peter 2:9; 1 John 1:5-7; 1 John 2:9-11). Privacy can easily lead into secrecy. And secrecy leads to all kinds of trouble because it’s not exposed to “the light.”
When we give the vow to enter into a marital relationship, we give up the right to secrecy. There is a difference between privacy and secrecy. (To better understand the difference please read the article, Privacy Vs Secrecy in Marriage.) Be careful of the statement, “what they don’t know won’t hurt them” because often it will.
In Marriage:
• God wants to take the “two of us and make us one.” The enemy of our faith wants to take the “oneness of us” and make us into two. The goal is to lead us to the place of “creeping separateness.”
“The killer of love is creeping separateness. It’s taking love for granted, especially after marriage. It’s ceasing to do things together —finding separate interests. Additionally, it’s ‘we’ turning into ‘I.’ …The failure of love might seem to be caused by hate or boredom or unfaithfulness with a lover. But those were results. First came the creeping separateness: the failure behind the failure.” (Sheldon Vanauken)
• As you read Matthew 5:31-32 you can see that “Jesus is trying to move us from easy divorce to a deeper commitment to marriage.” (Dr. Roger Barrier)
The Influence of Others
• Make it a priority to be involved with other couples on a regular basis, in order to support and be accountable to one another in your marriage relationships. Church small groups and Sunday schools are ideal. Hebrews 10:24-25 says, “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another and all the more as you see the day approaching.” (Alistair Begg)
• The surprising result of being honest about your fears and insecurities is that people may actually be more drawn to you (Dr. Todd Linaman) “The wisdom of the prudent is to understand his way, but the folly of fools is deceit.” (Proverbs 14:8)
• The enemy of our faith tries to divide us because he knows that “united we stand, divided we fall.” He fans the flames of rivalry and pride. How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!” (Psalm 133:1)
• What are you feeding in your marriage? Do you spend your time focusing on the negative or on the positive aspects of your spouse? The Bible tells us in Philippians 4:8-9: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable —if anything is excellent or praiseworthy —think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me —put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”
Unity in Marriage
• Prayer for marriages: “May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.”(John 17:23) This is also an example of how God wants us to function. God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit are separate individuals within the Godhead, yet they are one in purpose. In marriage the husband and wife are different individuals and yet they are to be one in purpose. (Cindy Wright)
• Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes (author unknown). “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.” (Proverbs 29:11)
• Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. (Romans 14:19)
• The lips of the righteous knows what is fitting, but the mouth of the wicked only what is perverse. (Proverbs 10:32)
• An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. (Proverbs 24:26)
• Jesus said, “I came that they might have life and have it to the full.” (John 10:10) When applying this message to marriage, it’s not that those who don’t have a personal relationship with Christ can’t have a good marriage. They can. We’ve seen this to be true. But to have a full, rich, abundant married life together, Christ is the key. Marriage is all about the love of God displayed through ordinary people. (Cindy Wright)
Listen and Be Wise
• “There are two hindrances to good communication that must be overcome. There’s the bad habit of lazy listening and hasty speaking.” (John Lavendar) (Goes with James 1:19)
• Let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance. (Proverbs 1:5)
• The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice. (Proverbs 12:15)
• The discerning heart seeks knowledge, but the mouth of a fool feeds on folly. (Proverbs 15:14)
• He who listens to a life-giving rebuke will be at home among the wise. (Proverbs 15:31)
• He who answers before listening —that is his folly and his shame. (Proverbs 18:13)
• The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge; the ears of the wise seek it out. (Proverbs 18:15)
• Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. (Proverbs 19:20)
• Apply your heart to instruction and your ears to words of knowledge. (Proverbs 23:12)
• Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. (James 1:19)
Be Aware of What You Say and How You Say It
• A quiet and gentle spirit disarms men. (Dr Charles Swindoll) This is in reference to the scripture that says, “Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. It should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” (1 Peter 3:1-2 and 1 Peter 3:4)
• Say what you mean, mean what you say, but don’t say it mean. “Speaking the truth in love, may [we] grow up in all things into Him who is the head —CHRIST.” (Ephesians 4:15)
• A wise man’s heart guides his mouth, and his lips promote instruction. (Proverbs 16:23)
• The lips of the righteous know what is fitting, but the mouth of the wicked only what is perverse. (Proverbs 10:29)
• Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. (Proverbs 12:18)
• A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered. (Proverbs 17:27)
• A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions. (Proverbs 18:2)
• Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (Philippians 4:29)
Make Sure You:
• Put away perversity from your mouth keep corrupt talk far from your lips. (Proverbs 4:24)
• He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin. (Proverbs 13:3)
• My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All of the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse. (Proverbs 8:7-8)
• The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. (Proverbs 18:21)
• A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control. (Proverbs 29:11)
• Love is not rude; it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered, and keeps no record of wrongs. (1 Corinthians 13:5)
Biting Anger
• If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. (Galatians 5:15)
• In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. (1 Peter 2:11)
• Remind the people to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men. (Titus 3:2)
• Think of your marriage as sacred ground. It’s a union God has sanctioned, not just because you were determined to come together but also for God’s purpose. “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” (Matthew 19:6)
• Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so? (Amos 3:3)
• The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 5:2, “Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few.”
As God Commands:
• Serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Galatians 5:13-14)
• Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others. (1 Corinthians 10:24)
• Everything is permissible —but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible —but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others. (1 Corinthians 10:23-24)
• Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. (Galatians 6:9-10)
• But wisdom is proved right by her actions. (Matthew 11:19)
• But I tell you that men will have to give account on the Day of Judgment, for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned. (Matthew 12:37)
• My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this —that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. (John 15:12-14)
• Love is both an intention and an action. “Let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.” (1 John 3:18)
If you have additional scriptures and/or tips to help others, please “Join the Discussion” by adding your comments below.
Filed under: Spiritual Matters
(USA) I’m thankful to God I found this site. I want to encourage you to also be encouraged in any way possible, as often as possible.
(USA) This website is awesome. My wife and I are going through a really rough time right now. I have made many mistakes in our marriage and haven’t been the husband she deserves. I want to be a great husband and father, and realize that the only way this will happen is to give myself to God and pray every day for the strength to be a good husband and father.
(UNITED STATES) Hello. I read all these stories and am so overwhelmed. I’m seeing that I’m not the only one going through a lot in marriage. I’m a women of God that loves THE LORD. Before my husband went to jail, we went to church together, and studied the word. We were only together for two months, before he went in. We always knew each other.
To make a long story short he went to jail, and came home MUSLIM. I don’t judge anyone but the word of GOD says how can two walk together if they don’t agree? I tried to get divorced three times and it still did not work. My husband blames everything on me that happens in the marriage. We have been separated off and on the whole of 10 years, I told GOD I’m TIRED, BUT I STILL TRUST HIM.
My husband lives with a women know. I said, GOD, I know you’re not going to keep me like this. GOD said to me, DIVORCE IS NOT AN OPTION. I don’t want to move on my flesh. He swears a lot, drinks, smokes weed. I love GOD so much I’m going to stand still and see the salvation of the Lord, his WORD shall not come back to me void. God said to seek thee first the Kingdom of GOD and all his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto me.
He had a baby with his baby’s mother while we were separated. It’s just so much. I have to break the curses off my marriage and the curses from our fore fathers. We must acknowledge what the word says they did. They caused their generational children to be cursed.
I’m going to stand and know that GOD is able to do anything I ask him to do in HIS SON JESUS’ NAME. I’M BELIEVING GOD THAT IF WE TOUCH AND AGREE LADIES, WE WILL SEE CHANGE. FOR THERE IS NOTHING TOO HARD FOR GOD. THIS IS MY SEASON. THE DEVIL IS GIVING BACK EVERYTHING 7 TIMES THAT HE TOOK FROM ME AND MY FAMILY/MARRIAGE. I DECREE IT SO IN JESUS NAME LADIES, STAY ENCOURAGED. GOD IS ALIVE.
(UNITED STATES) I love the way the scripture’s given on this website. It makes a lot of sense and they are truly a blessing. I am going to share this with my husband.
(USA) This is a great website… My marriage is hanging on by a thread. I’m hoping me and my spouse can read through everything, and learn more from the Bible. Please pray for me. Thanks.
(NIGERIA) This is such an awesome site! Currently having problems in my marriage and I know it’s all my fault. Before now, I never really understood what the word ‘submission’ meant. I never realised how dishonouring it was to vent anger and horrible words to my husband. After going through this whole page, I am truly repentant and I am praying for God’s guidance and most importantly that the Holy Spirit will always be there to remind me when I try to lose it. Praise be to God.
(USA) I have been with my spouse since high school, she was 15 and I was 17 it was so amazing the way we could just feel “LOVE”. I knew right away that God had a plan for us. We married after 6 yrs of dating, then bought our first home shortly after. We then brought our first baby into this world. It was all going so perfect. In 8 years of being together at that point I can honestly say I never slept on the couch because of an argument nor did we ever go to sleep angry at one another.
I was a firefighter at the time, but was missing too much in seeing my child grow that not being there was a big issue for me. So one night I called my father who owned a dealership and told him of my issues. He said “son I understand and if you would like I have a great carrer and lots of money to be made if you want to work for me. The thought of coming home to my family everynight was a no brainer. I quit the dept and took what I thought was the right path. Started working making more money than ever and decided to have another child.
Well, my wife being 8 mo along the car business went south. We lost our home and everyhting we had worked so hard for all at once. Trying to make ends meet, living week to week and moving in with her parents was not something I would bare. Well, after living with my inlaws for 3 yrs I had shut myself off from everyone in my life. I started to lose my faith, becoming depressed angry and bitter. I didn’t know this was happening at the time. I became emotionally unattached to my wife and children.
My wife then persuaded the emotion elsewhere by finding a long lost X boyfriend that was going through the same thing with his spouse so they connected but on a level that I thought would never happen to us. This went on for 8 months between them without me even knowing. My wife was still showing me the same effection so I had no idea to suspect anything.
Well, two days before Christmas 2010 I was on my wife’s phone and a txt came across from this other man saying “I Love You too and I know we are meant to be, so lets join families and be in love again.” My wife had no idea I had seen this nor did I react right away. She then replied back later that evening, “I Love You and know in my heart that this can work”. I was crushed when I read this and confronted her about it.
We than separated for her best interest even though I was willing to forgive and forget. Well 3 months went by with us not living together. I was trying everything I could to get her back. It seemed hopeless. I then decided to get my own home because I had a new job that was being paid well again. Well, she decided to give me another chance. Her and my two children moved in with me trying to make it work, but I couldn’t trust any longer and wanted her to be the way she was towards me before. I wasn’t getting any gratification and my expectations were pushing her away again.
This has been going on for a year now and I can’t take it anymore. We argue about everything and we both constantly bring up the past to point the finger about whose right and whose wrong. It’s taking a toll on our children who are now 7 and 4 yrs old. They show anger too but we are not angry people. This has to stop, but my mind won’t stop thinking she will hurt me again or she’s not ever telling me the truth. I have lost all faith in my wife but don’t want to be this way.
We started marrige counseling just last Sunday through our church but the first session we had was not so good. She told our pastor what was happening and he looked me in the eyes and started discussing what I need to do. The whole sesion was based on what I’m doing wrong, never a word directed at her. I stayed calm and only agreed, the session was over before I knew it. I was speechless and not sure how to take it or what to even say to my wife??????????????? I want to love her as I love myself but I feel everyday she will not let me????? I’m now reading the book of the Lord for some guidance.
I have no more friends and my own family thinks I’m crazy and really need therapy. I don’t think so. I just want to be loved and be in love again with my wife. We just found out she is pregnant with our 3rd but she was on birth control at the time. Is this an act of God? How do I make everthing good and love and trust again??? Our 9 yr anniversay is this April and want to renew my vows to her, but we are far from that, it seems to me. God, please help me to be stong and have faith in my heart again and forever. Amen.
(PHILIPPINES) Hi Brandon, I cried while I read your letter. I feel your pain. I am praying that you will be stronger, gain faith in your heart and forever love your wife. Be good, do good… God bless you
(SOUTH AFRICA) WOW! I am totally grateful to hear all your ladies’ comments. This site has truly been drawn to me by God. I have been married for 1 and half months and I am trying to introduce my husband to God and hope our marriage will be strengthened my the Word of God and his scriptures and I pray that we can live on His Word on a day to day basis. May God bless you all!
(USA) My husband and I have been married for two year with an anniversary coming up on the 18th February, which will make it 3 years. Throughout our marriage we lived very hard but we fought even harder. My husband has said the most vile things to me and I returned his anger with physical violence. I am grateful Tobit says he has never put his hands on me in return.
I have three children from previous relationships and he has no children from any relationship. I know whole-heartedly that he has accepted my children as his own, but after my third child I tied my tubes so I currently cannot have children. In his anger he hasn’t let me forget it.
About a month ago I left my husband with a lie in my heart because my youngest child’s father returned into my life after being in prison for a crime I committed. We never ended the relationship fully. It just faded out. My life was moving and he refused to have the stress of worrying about me and the kids.
So after 5 years he wants us back and is wondering if we have a chance. My heart was torn because now my husband wants me home, willing to do whatever it takes to get me and the kids back. But I can’t forget the fights between us. The kids shows no signs of distress but improvement. I am free to be me, something I wasn’t in our marriage. I say that because our fights were so horrible and because my husband is a man, who doesn’t bend, I took on a passive role to allow peace. But in truth, it made it worse.
I have since rejoined the church I left and the one my husband refused to go to, but I can’t shake this feeling that I’m wrong. I don’t like this feeling that I am a cheat, even though I haven’t done anything physical with my daughter’s father and don’t plan to until this marriage is over.
My husband now wants to go to counseling, wants to go to my church, wants to do all the things he promised and rain checked me and the kids on. Most of all he plans to cut off our family financially because his wife and kids have gone without, because of that burden. A part of me wants to keep moving on, ignoring his desperate plea of reconciliation and a part of me wants to to see if he can live up to his end of our marriage.
Another part is like, you have put your hands on him in anger on several occasions and in all of your 28 years on this earth you have never resorted to violence to answer a problem, never been a person to act out in rage. This split mind of mine is making me recognize the focus of my children and that brings me such shame. I know a double mind is not of God. I know the feelings for my ex are not right to feel, being a committed married woman. No matter the problems going on in my marriage, and I know fear is the enemy who I do not serve.
I’ve told myself, you have no one to seek counsel from. I have to make a sound decision for the sake of my children. I’m searching for answer…
(SAUDI ARABIA) I am already engaged, and we are preparing for our marriage, only for us to get to the village for the bride price paying. They now told us that we can’t get married –that we are related, and we are the fifth generation.
I don’t know what to do. We love each other so much. We are finding it difficult to part. It’s not until we met one Rev father who told us that in the Bible it stops at third generation, that I don’t know what to do. Should I still wait for him and keep telling the suitors coming I am engaged? Please help me. I am confused. Thanks.
(PHILIPPINES) In marriage the presence of LRT must always be there. Love, Respect and Trust.
(USA) The quote, “Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes” is by Jack Handey.
(UNITED STATES) I am trying to not only save my marriage but my brother’s as well through God. This website is a big help! Love conquers all!
(USA) Thank you for the helpful scriptures. I haven’t found any blogs about my problem so I am posting for help. Out of the blue my husband told me that I live in the past, I have so much anger and he has been depressed because he said he can no longer make me happy. This has made him sick and everytime we talk he gets a stomachache. He’s a quiet and private person and he’s never complained in our 20 yr marriage. He has lost 20 lbs and he told me we should possibly separate until he feels better. I’ve been dealing with depression of losing my father last year so I know I have anger and frustration.
I’m scared that he might have found someone else or is searching for new love.
(UNITED STATES) My husband and I been married for a year, and recently we had a talk about if he has any other children that he doesn’t know about. He said no, that I dont have to worry about it.
So the next day he tells me about this women that has a baby (girl) and the baby is not his but he wants to be in the the little girl’s life. He and this women use to have feelings for each other. I dont agree with it but he already has his mind made up… and this is tearing me up inside. We have not been gettin along… and there were times I felt like leaving. I felt like him and this women had intentions. I just dont want to be hurt. I have sacraficed so much for him.
We have 3 children. Two are his and we just had our own last year. It’s going on a month now and it’s still hard for me to deal with the situation. The little girl is 2. The second day she came over she was calling him daddy. I don’t agree also because of what our living situation is right now. I am seeking for Jesus so badly right now because I know he is the only one that can make me feel whole and come to deal with this. Am I wrong for feeling the way I do?