Please answer this question by leaving a comment below
(To see previous questions, visit our archive)
This is a simple question posed, for a very important reason. The reason we pose it is because so many spouses are in the position of going to church without their spouse. They don’t want to, but it’s either a matter of going alone, or not going at all. So we’re asking you, if you go to church without your spouse, what helps you? What has God, and others spoken to you that helps?
Concerning this question, Dr Ralph F. Wilson wrote:
“A sense of responsibility for her children’s faith is what motivated Dyann. “One Sunday morning I realized that my six-year- old had never been to church or Sunday school,” she said. “I know I can’t give her my faith, but I am responsible to help her learn about Jesus so she’ll be able to develop her own faith as she grows. To rob her of a knowledge of God would be even worse than robbing her of the ability to learn to read.” Dyann and her daughter, Lisa, have been attending church ever since. (From the Joyfulheart.com article, “Should Wives Go To Church Without Their Husbands?”)
This is something to prayerfully consider.
Also, Before Answering Our Question:
Here’s a piece of advice written by Desiree S. Coleman, that you may find helpful:
“In being true to yourself, explain to your spouse why your faith is important to you. Likewise, express your desire for a united family. And communicate how you would love to have a shared commitment to faith. And then, as cliche as it sounds, you will have to let go and let God do the work. Realize that the spiritual walk involves spiritual things. In other words, at a certain point, there is only so much that you can do and say. At that point, you will have to activate your faith and believe God to draw your spouse unto Him. And don’t lose hope when it seems like nothing is happening. Because when you’ve exhausted all your options and handed it to God, that’s when you realize He has been at work all along. (From the Blackandmarriedwithkids.com article, “5 Things To Do If Your Spouse Won’t Come To Church”)
The following is some advice that Lynn Donovan gives from her own personal experience:
“Here are some lessons I’ve learned through sitting alone in church. One, I’m not the only one. My spiritual mismatched allowed me to see many others who don’t fit in. My heart is drawn to those who are alone, even those who feel alone but ARE sitting with a spouse. And my friends, churches are filled with these kinds of people who pretend their marriage is perfect. It’s simply not true. Every marriage, including your pastor’s will struggle, even greatly struggle at some point. It’s just different from yours.
“Allow yourself to set aside your loneliness and pain and truly look around you. It’s likely your training here at SUM and through the Word will allow you to speak love and truth into some other misfit who is sitting in the sanctuary. And that my friends, is exactly what delights the heart of God. BTW: Ultimately we will discover we are all misfits and that is exactly what God intends!!! (From the Spirituallyunequallyyokedmarriage.com article, “Going to Church Alone”)
Additionally, here is a link to an article that will lead you to even more advice that you may find to be helpful. We encourage you to read:
Now, once again, the question we’re posing. We hope you can give some insights to help others as you answer it:
If you go to church without your spouse, how do you deal with unmet expectations?