The following are a number of Facebook marriage quotes that Marriage Missions International individually posted on our Facebook site. They can be used in a variety of ways:
• A church, ministry, counseling organization, or an individual can use them to share on their Facebook site, if desired.
• They can be used as points of discussion in marriage classes, mentoring, counseling, or coaching situations.
• Couples or individuals can use these quotes to discuss or consider the issues raised, allowing the Holy Spirit, our Wonderful Counselor, to speak further to them.
They make great discussion points for those couples who want to use them for conversation starters for their 22 Minute Date (the guidelines are posted in the Romantic Idea topic). Just make sure, if you use these quotes in a dating situation, you don’t get into heated arguments over them.
Facebook Marriage Quotes
The point in sharing these marriage tips is to build marital relationship bridges, not construct walls of contention, causing a breakdown of communication. You can constructively disagree with these tips and with each other, and still learn more about each other and grow closer together, in the process.
It is our sincere hope that the tips below will help marriages. As you read them, consider:
1. Do you agree or disagree? Why or why not?
2. Do you have further thoughts on the issue, to apply personally or as a general rule? (If you’re reading them with someone else, please share.)
3. Do any scriptures come to mind, which apply to the marriage tip given? (If possible, please share.)
The following are quotes to note for your use (the sources are noted afterward in parenthesis).
“If you have played the fool and exalted yourself, or if you have planned evil, clap your hand over your mouth! For as churning the milk produces butter, and as twisting the nose produces blood, so stirring up anger produces strife.” (Proverbs 30:32-33) “A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you’re in deep water” (or even more so, before). “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near” (Philippians 4:5).
Jesus vanquished the devil by saying, ‘It is written‘ over and over again (see Matt. 4:4-10). Jesus quoted 3 scriptures, and the devil fled. So who do we think we are? How do we think we’re going to win this battle of life–this struggle for our marriages and our families—without the resource that was vital to our Lord’s victory over the enemy? Knowledge of God’s Word is the only way we’re going to succeed. (Jimmy Evans)
“With the high expectations for various situations and circumstances surrounding the Christmas season, even the best of marriages can be thrown for a loop. Follow this quick plan for landing on your feet when this happens to you: -Take a moment to write two or three challenges you have faced during the holidays as a couple. -Consider what made the challenges difficult. -Write down what your expectations were and how they contributed to the difficulties. -Note what you wish you would have done differently. -Talk about your past difficulties as a couple. This quick review will help you keep perspective when you hit a bump this Christmas. -Try to predict where your challenges will be in the days to come and explore what you can do to handle them well. How can you help each other this holiday season?” (Drs Les and Leslie Parrott)
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! May your marriage be blessed! This New Year, keep in mind: “You & your mate can maintain dedication to each other by keeping a positive vision of your future. Contrast this with what chronically unhappy couples do: they nurture an obsession with the past, rather than a vision for the future.” -Scott Stanley. “Where there is no vision, the people perish” Proverbs 29:18. Pray together; dream together.
If you add prayer to your marital relationship, research by “FamilyLife.com shows that only 1% of couples that pray together ever divorce.” 1% is very low indeed! Families that pray together stay together. Prayer breaks down spiritual walls, removes strongholds, opens the doors of communication, blends a couple together, and invites God into the midst of your relationship. -David & Gretchen Willard (David and Gretchen Willard)
Although the Bible doesn’t say directly, “Husbands and wives, pray for each other,” it does say in James 5:16 that we’re to “pray for each other so that you may be healed.” That certainly includes husbands praying for wives & wives praying for husbands. One couple said, ‘Every time we pray together, we begin by praying a blessing over each other. This to edifies our spouse & makes them feel loved.'” (David and Jan Stoop)
When you pray with your spouse, you’re drawn into unity with God and, as a result, with one another. That’s because prayer promotes unity. Just as physical intimacy reaffirms your oneness, so does praying together. When you pray as a couple, you’re not only communicating with God, but also with each other. You can learn so much about one another by sharing prayer requests and listening to each other pray. (Stormie Omartian)
Take this Scripture to heart, ‘Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.’ (Psalm 90:12) Our marriages all come with an expiration date. We may have only this day to connect our hearts; tomorrow may not come. We need to ask God to give us the wisdom to see our marriage as He views it. Once we do, we’ll make it the highest priority in our lives after our relationship with Christ. (Bob and Cheryl Moeller)
“While perfection isn’t possible or even necessary, your behavior can attract or repel your spouse where spiritual growth is concerned. You’re living out what you’re experiencing with God. Is it appealing? Is your relationship with Christ making you a more enjoyable person to live with—or just a more religious one?” -Rob Jackson. “If anyone considers himself religious & yet…” (See James 1:26-27.) (From, Focusonthefamily.com article, “Helping Your Spouse Grow Spiritually”)
“Focus on being kind and not on being right. It’s easy to spend time showing your spouse that you’re right. Focus on being kind instead and you’ll argue less and enjoy each other more.” “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death” -Proverbs 14:12 (even death of a marriage). “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” -Ephesians 4:32 (Mark Brandenburg)
The Deceiver would love for us to believe that, contrary to God’s inspired plan for lifelong intrigue and enthusiasm, love can sputter and die. When we fall prey to the lie that there’s nothing left to discover about our spouse, the only way to feel alive is to search for intrigue outside the marriage. The truth is, marriage provides the IDEAL opportunity for the ultimate romantic experience. No other relationship is more perfectly designed for the lifelong interplay between exploration and being discovered— “knowing” and “being known.” (Dr Robert S. Paul)
No marriage will be without difficulties. But when you love your spouse with God’s kind of extravagant love, you’ll see transformation resulting in a better outlook in the short term & a better marriage in the long term. -M.L. “Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that” -The Message. (Marita Littauer, & Eph. 5:1-2)
Set up safeguards for your marriage with other relationships in your life. Setting up boundaries around the marriage relationship is key to protecting you, your spouse, your marriage, your kids, and your reputation. Be sure that you and your spouse are on the same page when it comes to what is or is not acceptable for each other on Facebook. A little prevention can go a long way to safeguard your relationship. (K. Jason and Kelli Krafsky)
Every Facebooking couple should protect their marriage! Spend time talking about what’s in & out of bounds. As a couple, agree on what boundaries you’ll set as a couple. Agreement can save a lot of pain later. Share your username and password with one another. Transparency is crucial to ensure trust in a committed relationship. Exchanging login info provides accountability and emotional security for both of you. (K. Jason and Kelli Krafsky)
Relationships go up and down while love comes and goes. Someone once asked Alan Alda, the famous TV star, how he managed to have such a long and successful marriage. His answer was that most relationships begin with a “vibrant” love, but soon fade into “utter discontent.” It’s easy to give up and forget that “love returns in waves… you just have to wait it out.” Alan Alda was right; love is like the tides of the ocean. Sometimes they come in & the passion is high. You feel the love and the relationship is wonderful. Then there are times when the tide is out—sometimes way out. The relationship is dry and lifeless. The love is gone. You look out at the sea and wonder if the tide will ever return. But if you’re patient and stay at the beach, romance will return. You will feel love again. (Dr Steve Stephens)
The tedious ins-and-outs and the difficulties of life together can be grating unless we realize: It’s not all about us. Marriage is not about the way of happiness; it’s about the Way of the Cross. Living in the shadow of the Cross, especially in the context of marital love, involves a daily dying to self, a constant sense of living for the other person, even when they’re annoying, thoughtless, or distant. (Bonnie McMaken)
Make loving your spouse a top priority, 2nd only to your relationship with Christ. Questions for you & your spouse to discuss: Does the example of a loving, committed marriage have an impact on others? What will people say was the legacy of our marriage? What steps can we each take to redeem the days we have left together? -Moeller “Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” -Psalm 90:12 (Bob and Cheryl Moeller)
Passion only fades when people lose their curiosity. When I realized God’s intention was for me to live life in awe of Him and my wife, I knew I’d never become lethargic in marriage because I CHOOSE otherwise. Determine to pursue a spirit of fascination. Some people think boredom comes and goes like the flu. However, boredom is man-made -R. Paul. Intentionally work to “know” and “be known” by your spouse and God will bless. (Robert S. Paul for quote)
As Pastor Emerson Eggerichs points out: “Giving the gift of Godly love and respect is the way to use wisdom and understanding to establish your home” (See Proverbs 24:3). “I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:1-3).
3 Marriage building blocks: -“God is the witness to your vows. Recommit yourself to be forever faithful to your husband or wife. -Your spouse is your partner. What 1 thing can you do to demonstrate your partnership this week? Is there a project you can tackle together? -God’s intention is for intimate oneness. Think of 1 thing that might be blocking your unity and resolve to solve it.” (Dr Ray Pritchard, from Keepbelieving.com sermon, “Living in the Light of the Future”)
The happiest couples I know have their marriage priorities straight. Both the husband and wife continually work on their connection. They have a relationship with God, with one another, their family, and volunteer their time helping others. “And remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He said, It is more blessed to give than to receive” -Acts 20:35. The marriage mindset exists in giving to others. (David and Gretchen Willard)
Disappointment and a lack of respect are often birthed out of unrealistic expectations. It’s not fair to compare your marriage to something you’ve seen in a movie or read about in a novel—that marriage isn’t real. And even if you see a marriage at church, you don’t know what’s really going on during less public moments. (Gary Thomas)
Husbands feel respected when their wives express appreciation for what they do. Women, by contrast, feel respect when they are supported for who they are. Marital disrespect, however, almost always derives from one of three types of issues: delusions of grandeur, devalued self-worth or unchecked fears. These selfish tendencies push God into the margin — resulting in an unbalanced marriage where spouses behave defensively. Increasing respect necessitates understanding how your spouse feels respected, assessing your own control issues and praying for healing in this area. (Dr. Harold L. Arnold)
Love doesn’t nitpick. It doesn’t point out every flaw and failing of your mate. In a small group, we were discussing this point and one of the wives present said a very wise thing: “You can’t talk everything out. Some things you just decide not to worry about.” She’s right. If you took time to point out every mistake your husband or wife made, you wouldn’t have time for anything else. Love doesn’t nitpick. (Dr Ray Pritchard)
Love doesn’t do its dirty laundry for all the world to see. I cringe whenever I hear a husband humiliating his wife in public or a wife making snide remarks about her husband. If they do that in public, what do they do in private? A friend once told me, “There are times when I’ve been sorry I opened my mouth. But there has never been a time I’ve been sorry I kept silent.” That’s excellent advice! (Dr Ray Pritchard)
Marriage is the prism through which God reveals His covenant relationship with His people. This is stated strongly in Ephesians 5 where we read that when the husband and wife fulfill their God-given roles and live out His purposes, everyone around them learns more about the loving leadership that Jesus has for the church. God not only designed marriage for companionship but to further His purposes on earth. (Dr Ray Pritchard)
“Conflict makes our beloved seem like an enemy. We can begin to think, ‘It’s me against you!’ when we’re supposed to be on the same side. When we pick a fight with our spouse and try to take vengeance by getting our own way, we’re not trusting God to fulfill his promise to work in someone’s life. If we’re supposed to give food and water to our enemy, then let’s resolve our conflicts with our best friend —our mate!” (From Crosswalk.com article, “How to Resolve the Four Kinds of Marital Conflict”)
When conflicting with your spouse: “Stay focused on the real issue. That means that you agree ahead of time on the real issue, one topic at a time. While it may be tempting to take side trips from one topic to another, it will confuse the real issue. Pick a topic and stick with it. It may be helpful to keep a pad and pencil handy to remind yourselves of your starting point, as well as a desired ending.” (Dr David Hawkins)
When conflicting: “Find solutions that work for both of you. Rather than engaging in a downward spiral where 1 person ‘wins’ the other ‘loses,’ how about working on an upward spiral where you both feel like you reach a positive outcome? It takes creative discussions to find agreements that meet both of your needs. 1-sided victories are hollow. Finding solutions that work for both of you can draw you closer together.” (Dr David Hawkins)
“Agree to call a time out when emotions run high. ‘Take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life God desires.‘ (James 1:19-20) James is clear—2 ears to hear, 1 mouth to speak carefully. Practice really listening, not pushing your agenda. When emotions run high, call a time out and start again when both feel settled.” (Dr David Hawkins)
“When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider.” -Ecclesiastes 7:14 “Are you overreacting to times of trouble? It’s tempting, when times are bad, to believe that everything is bad. When emotions are high, things get blown out of perspective. Battle lines are drawn and enemies are made. One must be careful to keep things in perspective. Love that once blossomed powerfully, can again.” (Dr David Hawkins)
It’s a short step from the marriage covenant to the gospel message. Both are based on holy promises; both are made without regard to the action of the other party. Most importantly, it’s the holy promise of the gospel, which makes possible the holy promise of the marriage covenant. We’re enabled to keep our promises to each other precisely because God has kept his promises to us. His promise stands behind ours. (Dr Ray Pritchard)
Without Jesus Christ, marriage becomes an endurance contest. But with him, a Christian marriage cannot only endure, but it can triumph. A Christian marriage is a mirror of divine reality. As 2 Christians keep their promises to each other, the world sees in reflection the greater truth that God keeps his promises to us. Thus, a truly Christian marriage proclaims the very gospel upon which it is built. (Dr Ray Pritchard)
Live your marriage God’s way, not mans. “This is a generation that wants the form of the past, but not the values of the past. They want a traditional family, but without the commitment that made the traditional family possible. They live with 1 foot uneasily perched in the past and 1 foot firmly planted in the present. No wonder their lives are unstable. No wonder lifelong marriage is a hard concept to swallow.” (Dr Ray Pritchard)
If happiness is our primary goal, we’ll all get a divorce as soon as happiness seems to wane. If receiving love is our primary goal, we’ll dump our spouse as soon as they seem to be less attentive. But if we marry for the glory of God, to model His love and commitment to our children, and to reveal His witness to the world, divorce makes no sense” (Gary Thomas)
“Marriage is a union of bodies, heart and soul. Honesty and trust are the basis of the relationship. When it comes to marriage they’re building blocks. Hence, if either of them is missing then the foundation is shaky. With a shaky foundation no building can survive. Make sure that you’re honest with each other. Nothing will hurt your partner or your marriage more than the knowledge that you’ve been dishonest with them.” (Dennis Rainey)
All marriages have problems because they are made up of two imperfect people. But if you add the presence of a perfect God, then you have unlimited possibilities for drawing closer to what God intended for marriage. Whether that happens is determined by how frequently and how fervently God is invited into your relationship. The more you pray together, the more you will see God do great things. (Stormie Omartian)
In your marriage: “Sincerely desire the other person’s best. Most times that I’m angry with my husband, it’s because I didn’t get my way. When I step back and think about how I can help him be everything he can be in Christ, I feel a lot more compassion for him—I feel an emotional attachment that I would call romance. What do you think romance truly is?” “Love is not self-seeking…” -1 Corinthians 13:5 (JoHannah Reardon)
In marriage, “think of a triangle. The bottom left corner is the husband; the bottom right corner is the wife. The top of the triangle is Jesus Christ. The point is: however you communicate with your spouse horizontally —lovingly or otherwise, you’re also communicating these same words to the Lord vertically. Marriage is not a relationship of only 2, but 3. The husband, the wife and the Lord are all connected.” (Emerson Eggerichs)
Choose your words carefully and wisely. “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap” -Galatians 6:7. This is a promise for all of us. Before you say something regarding your spouse, whether casual or in argument ask this question, “Does it agree with what God says about my spouse?” If it doesn’t line up with the Word of God, don’t say it. (David and Gretchen Willard)
Someone has said that ‘there is no higher level of human sharing than that between a man and a woman, united in love and marriage, working on an assignment that’s been handed them by God.’ Too many of us view marriage as the end, when it is actually a means to the end. If all you do is pursue your own pleasure, your own comfort, or your own problems, you will miss what you have been designed to do. (Dr Ray Pritchard)
Invest your time in togetherness: “I’ve never heard a man say on his deathbed, ‘I wish I’d spent more time at the office.’ But many have said, “I wish I had spent more time with my wife and with my children.” In the end, most of what we have done will fade into nothingness, and we will find that we filled our days with the froth of a thousand trivial details. Much that we value now will seem pointless to us then.” (Dr Ray Pritchard)
“Let’s begin with a little quiz. What well-known television actor said the following? ‘To me the greatest Latin lover in the world was my Dad, who married my mother and was faithful to her until the day he died 55 years later. Now, that’s a great lover —a man who’s intelligent and romantic enough to keep one woman interested all the time.’ Do you know who said that? I’ll give you a hint. You see him on commercials talking about rich Corinthian leather. Still don’t know? He played Zachary Powers on ‘The Colby’s.’ If that doesn’t help, he is most famous for his starring role on ‘Fantasy Island.’ His name is Ricardo Montalban and he has followed in his father’s footsteps. He has been married to the same woman for over 45 years.” (Dr Ray Prichard)
It is not primarily your love that holds your marriage together; it is your marriage that holds your love together. It is that commitment that enables your love to go on and on and on, and without that commitment your love is going to disintegrate. (Adrian Rogers)
“‘Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven,” Jesus said (Matt. 18:3). Those who, like children, remain teachable and open to change stand in stark contrast to adults who quickly become strangers to surprise. The day we stop learning and growing together is the day marriage becomes a holding pattern” FIND ways to experience fun together in your marriage. (Dr Robert S. Paul)
Marriage is of central importance because it’s one of the key ways God displays His glory in the world. The key word is “glory,” which speaks of God’s greatness, His character and His reputation in the world. God intends that your marriage display something of His character to the world. Your marriage is about God! Until we grasp this, we’ll never have a proper foundation for thinking Christianly about marriage. (Dr Ray Pritchard)
Make this Valentine’s Day the best ever by keeping it protected from conflict. How, you ask? Simple. Before you go out on the big date, simply look at your partner and proudly claim the time as “fun time”. When you claim the night as fun time, what you are saying, is that you both agree to not allow conflict during your fun activities. So take a big time-out from conflict, even if something goofy happens, just look at your partner and say, “I’m okay, we can talk about this later tonight when we get home, but for now, let’s just have fun.” You might be thinking this is impossible, but it is not. Amy and I have had to do this very thing before, and it works, and it keeps our date night safe and protected from conflict. (From Smalley Update Newsletter, sent to us, Feb. 9, 2011) “Love perseveres.” -1 Corinthians 13
The enemy of your soul is also the enemy of your marriage, and therefore the enemy of your communication. Disrupting the lines of communication between a husband and wife is one of the enemy’s most common tactics. This can happen in even the best of marriages and in subtle ways so you think it’s you. Ask God to keep you both aware of the enemy’s hand in trying to stir up strife and misunderstandings between you. (Stormie Omartian)
“Good sense makes one slow to anger; it is his glory to overlook an offense” Prov. 19:11. Imagine how many heated arguments could be cooled if the husband or wife commits to “overlook an offense.” We’re not talking about serious sin issues. There’s a time where complete honesty and confessions need to be made for the marriage to grow and mature. I’m talking about daily irritations that can often set us on edge. (Tom Walter)
“It’s tempting to try to pick apart your spouse to figure out why he/she isn’t responding the way you respond spiritually. So you wonder things out loud (where he/she can hear you), talk to friends on the phone in disappointed tones—all in an effort to guilt him (her) into action. But the most important thing you can do is pray. God’s the only One who can engage your spouse. It has to happen from the inside out.” (Brad Mitchell)
“When you dwell on your partner’s shortcomings, you subtly reinforce them. A spouse generally fulfills whatever vision of life that’s painted, positive or negative. A better approach is to accentuate the positive and to enthusiastically applaud whatever progress you might see. Speaking words of respect and encouragement, in private and in front of others, can be influential in bringing about a desire to change.” (Lee and Leslie Strobel)
Respect for each other is an important aspect of marriage. When one spouse starts belittling other in front of family and friends then the other half loses that respect and starts hating his or her wife/husband. When the person whom you trust the most starts making fun of you in front of his family or friends this creates bitterness. Avoid making fun of each other if you don’t want to kill your marriage. (Swati Nitin Gupta)
“You cannot separate the horizontal from the vertical. You cannot talk one way to God and another way to your family, friends, etc. We’re warned about the power of the tongue. James wrote, ‘With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so‘ -James 3:9-10 ESV.” (Emerson Eggerichs)
“Don’t let things build up between you. Peter Jenkins walked across America and was asked if he ever felt like quitting. He said, Yes, many times. What made him feel like quitting? The high mountains? The searing sun? The danger? No. It was the sand in his shoes. The application to marriage: It’s not the big things that kill a relationship. It’s the little things—the sand in the shoes—that we neglect to take care of.” (Dr Ray Pritchard)
“When your spouse is doing or saying something wrong, immoral or dangerous, you must confront that behavior. As you challenge your spouse, however, you’re never justified in speaking words that are contemptuous. Before the Lord, you’re responsible to confront your spouse with words that come across as respectful. …There’s no guarantee a spouse will respond, but this manner is more likely to work than others.” (Dr Emerson Eggerichs)
“Don’t bad-mouth each other. It’s God’s Word, His Message, and His Royal Rule that takes a beating in that kind of talk. You’re supposed to be honoring the Message, not writing graffiti all over it” -from James 4:11, MSG. “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs… Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God” -Ephesians 4:29-30.
“When it comes to resolving conflicts, ‘the 1st price you pay is the cheapest.’ We tend to ignore problems, thinking if we ignore them, they’ll go away. That almost never happens. The price for solving relational problems goes up. Then they get bigger and become more painful to resolve. Finally the price for solving them becomes so great that divorce appears easier than dealing with the pain.” RESOLVE MATTERS EARLY! (Dr Ray Pritchard and wife Marlene)
“’Let no corrupt word proceed from your mouth, but only what is good for edification, that it imparts grace to the hearers‘ -Ephesians 4:29. The word translated ‘corrupt’ was used for decaying flesh or rotten fruit, meaning: ‘Don’t let any putrid words come out of your mouth’ or in street lingo, ‘No trash talk!’ That means: Every critical comment, filthy or harsh word, every cheap shot that comes out of your mouth… NO!” (Dr Ray Pritchard)
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