I want to share some gentle reminders emailed to us by Joel Saltzman, from Shake It! Books. Joel sent out these reminders on the subject of parenting after questioning a number of “kids.” But when you look deeper, you’ll see that each one of them also applies to how we treat each other in our marriage. So I included additional gentle marriage reminders in [brackets], as well.
Gentle Marriage Reminders
“In my workshops on parenting (‘Shake That Parenting Brain!’) I ask grown up kids (adults) what they needed from their own parents. More often than not, the responses focus on what they DIDN’T get from their parents, but wish they had. That said, I’d like to share with you some responses from a recent workshop. I’m sharing these in the hope that they may serve as ‘gentle reminders’ for what your own child [and spouse] may be missing.
“The prompt was this: ‘If I could have told my parents how to raise me, I would have said: _____.’
“Here are some of their answers:
“Be positive. Stop worrying. Laugh more. And be silly sometimes!”
“Stop nagging and instead discuss your concerns with me (and each other) in a calm, respectful manner.”
“Talk to each other instead of one of you giving one set of expectations while the other encourages the opposite.” [“Can two walk together, except they be agreed?” (Amos 3:3)]
“Take better care of yourself to set a better example for me.” [That includes your relationship.]
“Be there. Be fair. Show me the way.”
“Tell me when I do things right. And instill in me the belief that I will be a success.” [This is a good thing to do in your marriage, as well. Sometimes your marriage “partner” gets less encouragement from you than from others. This can cause problems on multiple levels.]
“Show unconditional love. It doesn’t matter if my socks don’t match! And please choose your words more carefully. They sting and stick.” [This same principle is good to remember in marriage.]
“Have a game night. Take a walk together. Watch a movie together and take turns on who gets to pick.”
And then here are a few additional marriage reminders to apply to your marriage relationship:
Video on the Issue of Gentle Marriage Reminders
I thought I’d end this blog with two “gentle reminders.” The first comes from something The Skit Guys did, which applies to husbands AND wives. You’ll know what that is after watching the following:
Most importantly, remember always, in the ways you treat your spouse and your children, the words of Jesus:
“Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:34-35)
Cindy Wright of Marriage International wrote this blog.
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