Love and Care Beyond Valentines

love and care AdobeStock_115213263 copyValentine’s Day is being celebrated next week in the U.S. (and other parts of the world). The tradition is to celebrate your love for one another at this special time of the year. Of course, we think ANY reason to celebrate love, especially marital love, is a great idea! We need more of it —but we’re talking about the true caring type of genuine love and care.

Love and Care

It’s not only romantic love that needs to grow in marriage, but also showing that you care. Too often we forget (in our everyday hectic lives) to do little things to show our spouse that we care. Life “happens” and we go with it this way and that. It takes intentionality to focus on growing that type of love.

It’s like what Roseanne Ellington says:

“Couples mistakenly believe that the fire of the honeymoon continues to roar on its own. The truth is that it burns inconsistently, sometimes flaring up, sometimes burning steadily, and sometimes waning into mere embers. It’s up to both partners to keep the fire burning, and it takes effort!”

And it does! We can attest to that.

To give you some ideas that you may or may not have thought to do, below is a great list of ways you can show your spouse that you care. William J. Lederer wrote this list (it’s posted in his book, “Marital Choices”) and we think it’s a great one. See what you think.

To show you care:

1. Greet me with a hug and a kiss before we get out of bed in the morning.
2. When you are walking, bring back a flower or a leaf.
3. Look at me, and smile.
4. Call me during the day and tell me something pleasant.
5. Turn off the lights and light a candle when we have dinner.
6. Ask me how I spent my day.
7. Meet me at the bus stop sometimes as a surprise.
8. Tell me how much you enjoy having breakfast with me.
9. Tell the children (in front of me) what a good parent I am.
10. When we sit together, put your arm around me.


11. When we’re together at home, ask me what songs I’d like to hear, and then play them.
12. Wash my back when I’m in the shower.
13. Have coffee with me in the morning so that we can have a five-minute talk together.
14. Hold me at night just before we go to sleep.
15. Ask my opinion about world affairs after we watch the news.
16. For no special reason, hug me and say you like me.
17. Hold my hand when we walk down the street.
18. When you see me coming up the drive, come out to meet me.
19. Put a surprise note in my lunch bag.
20. When we’re together, end your sentences with “dear” or “sweetheart.”
21. When we part in the morning, blow a kiss to me.

Show Care in Big and Small Ways

Steve and I do a lot of these things regularly. (That’s probably why both of us feel cherished by each other.) We try to show each other in big and small ways that we care.

What about you and your spouse? Do you and your spouse do some of these and other things to show you love and care? If you do, please share them with us below this Marriage Insight. We’d love the feedback. Together, maybe we can encourage other couples to grow closer to each other, as a result.

Most of all, may your love reveal and reflect the love of Christ next week, and every week,
Cindy and Steve Wright

— ALSO —

To help you to romance your spouse, here is an article that may help you:


Print Post

Filed under: Marriage Insights

Join the Discussion

Please observe the following guidelines:

  • Try to be as positive as possible when you make a comment.
  • If there is name-calling, or profane language, it will be deleted.
  • The same goes with hurtful comments targeted at belittling others; we won't post them.
  • Recommendations for people to divorce will be edited out–that's a decision between them and God, not us.
  • If you have a criticism, please make it constructive.
  • Be mindful that this is an international ministry where cultural differences need to be considered.
  • Please honor the fact this is a Christ-centered web site.

We review all comments before posting them to reduce spam and offensive content.


2 responses to “Love and Care Beyond Valentines

  1. These ideas are a little dated:
    * play a record ?
    * assumes that one works outside the home & the other stays at home
    * how about some modern ideas ?