Dealing With Panic Disorders Within Marriage

Panic - Pixabay keyboard-114439_1920Panic attacks and anxiety disorders sometimes sneak into a person’s life and can assault a marriage! They’re not something that anyone welcomes into their lives and believes will happen to them but they DO happen. And they happen to more people than we could probably ever imagine!

What are Panic Attacks?

“Panic attacks are sudden surges of overwhelming fear that that comes without warning and without any obvious reason. It is far more intense than having anxiety or the feeling of being ‘stressed out’ that most people experience. One out of every 75 people worldwide will experience a panic attack at one time in their lives.” (From

That’s a LOT of people who experience this debilitating disorder.

Here are a few additional specifics concerning panic attacks that might be helpful to know:

An interesting point about panic attacks:

“A fairly high percentage of attacks (61 percent) come while going to sleep. Quite a few occur during sleep and wake the sufferer. Since these patterns are quite common, let me comment on them. Why would a panic attack occur when you are relaxing or sleeping? It is a well-known fact that most stress symptoms don’t appear when you are at the height of your stressful situation.

“Take tension headaches, for example. They don’t attack while you are intensely preoccupied with some deadline and rushing to finish up a project. Tension headaches strike after the project is over, or more commonly, as you leave the office to go home, drive home, or sit down to unwind. This is how adrenaline works. During the emergency, adrenaline protects us from pain or stress discomfort. Only after adrenaline has done its job does it demand its penalty.” (Dr Archibald Hart, from the book, The Anxiety Cure)

What can you do to prevent panic attacks?

“Good preparation. After a stressful situation, allow yourself plenty of time to ‘unwind,’ and do your unwinding slowly. In other words, avoid a sudden drop in adrenaline. For instance, when you first get home from work, don’t go and crash in front of the television. Take a little walk. Enjoy the slow wind-down. Smell the flowers.

“Attend to ‘unfinished business’ in your thinking. Do a ‘mental wash’ and clean out any unresolved resentment, anger, or disappointments. Let go of stuff that is not really your responsibility. Listen to the birds. Then go home and putter around for a while. Then sit and read.

“Finally, relax completely. Such a slow wind-down pattern can avoid the sudden drop in adrenaline that seems to precipitate the onset of the more serious stress symptoms.” (Dr Archibald Hart, from the book, The Anxiety Cure)

We realize these are very simple points that are made about a very complicated situation, but even so, you may gain something from knowing them..

To read more about these “sudden surges of adrenaline” please click onto the web site links we provide below:




Cindy Wright of Marriage Missions International wrote this article.

If you have additional tips you can share to help others, please “Join the Discussion” by adding your comments below.

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6 responses to “Dealing With Panic Disorders Within Marriage

  1. My husband suffers from panic attacks and it has been extremely difficult. At first it was difficult because he did not tell me he was suffering at all. Once we got him help, the results were good. However, it comes and goes and so dealing with it for the long haul has been very trying.

  2. Carolyn, I am in the same boat with my husband right now. Did your husband come to you and say that this was the problem and he needed help or did you have to convince him that he needed help? We have not been married for very long and it’s becoming very very stressful, but I refuse to give up on a him or finding a solution.

  3. I am a New Yorker and I got married almost 2 years ago. I decided to make a big jump and move to the Netherlands. I came from a big city to a small dutch village without knowing the language. I couldn’t find work and I started getting panic attacks and anxiety with over thinking. It’s very stressful and I am in my head most of the time. However today I start cognitive behavioral therapy and I am very hopeful that this will disappear or at least help me with my over thinking.

    1. I’ve heard that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can help. I pray you have a good counselor, and that you are able to get past these panic attacks soon. They certainly are horrible. May the Lord guide you and help you, as you reach out for the help you need. :)

  4. Looking for some advise. My husband and I have been married for a year and a half and we have an 8 week old daughter. Lately, my husband has been experiencing panic attacks more frequently than ever before. I’m not sure what exactly triggers the attacks, but I’m guessing it’s due to the fact he is now a father and all of the responsibility that came with that role. In the last 3 weeks he has called 9-1-1 twice thinking he was having a heart attack; both times- no heart attack. I try to be supportive, but wish he would stop calling 911. How do I get him to calm down and realize he isn’t having a heart attack and just breathe through the episode?

  5. I suffer from severe panic disorder, my husband does not. This is something​ that I have had to live with for the last 18 years of my life. Sometimes I am high functioning, I feel almost normal. Others are really bad. The best thing I can tell someone who is in a relationship with someone who has panic attacks is this… First realize that there is not much control over when an attack happens. They can occur with or without a trigger. This is not the sufferers fault. Please don’t make them feel like it is. What we experience is very real, our heart rate goes up, we hyperventilate, we have chest pain, shortness of breath, numbness, tingling, intense overwhelming fear and so much more. We have a tendency to not be able to rationalize things. We may know we are having an attack but in the overwhelming response is usually fear, mainly because everything we feel is real.

    Second, just be reassuring. Don’t say it’s all in our head, don’t tell us we are crazy…Believe me we put ourselves down enough. Try to be understanding. Just let them know your there and while you don’t understand (believe me unless you experience it yourself you can’t) that you will be there. Pray with them, help them to refocus their thoughts. Remind them that they have felt this way before and even though it seems like forever, it goes away. Unfortunately there is no exact timing on how long it will take. Some last only an hour peaking at about the twenty minute mark,and others can last hours. Unfortunately for me I even have rolling attacks which can last days. Seek help, counseling, behavioral/cognitive therapy, medications. While there is no cure, it does help. Many blessings and prayers for you all