“You used to be MADLY IN LOVE, but now you’re JUST MAD!” (Gary and Carrie Oliver) Does that describe how you relate to your spouse? You used to see so much good in each other; but now you can barely see beyond the things that irritate you? Instead of enjoying a Read More…
Are you and your spouse both confronters or avoiders when you argue with each other? Or perhaps one of you is a confronter and the other is an avoider when it comes to conflict. It’s important to note: “There are as many ways to fight as there are personalities. Some Read More…
Do you get tired of “revisiting” certain issues with your spouse repeatedly? Yes, us too! We also go through this frustrating situation sometimes. We call them Déjà vu Arguments. It’s the same argument; it’s just repackaged, and keeps popping up repeatedly on different days, weeks or months. But why? Why Read More…
The question is: Can we have healthy fights within our marriage? The answer? Yes! But it will take intentionality to learn how to do that. Unhealthy fighting comes naturally when a sinner marries a sinner. And let’s face it… we all have a propensity to sin. That’s why we have Read More…
Most of us have been told that if we’re going to have a good marriage we’ll need to learn some important things along the way. That’s all a part of married life. Some will be good; and some will be bad. But what about “unlearning” some things? Can that be Read More…
We sure have learned a lot about each other and about marriage in the many years we’ve been married! One thing we’ve learned is how differently we approach matters when we’re upset. Before marrying we didn’t really notice it that much! (Isn’t that usually the case?) But after marrying we Read More…
The title of this Marriage Insight is “Love is Fragile — Handle with Care.” We came upon this title after reading something that psychologist Jean Lush said in a radio interview. In this interview she talked about spouses who fight with each other in toxic ways. We’re guilty of doing Read More…
If Cindy and I (Steve) are going to be transparent with you we did not fight in healthy ways earlier in our marriage. In fact, our approach was quite toxic. It was all about “winner take all.” Does that ring familiar with how you and your spouse argue? If so, Read More…
It’s confession time. We did not fight in healthy ways with each other in the first years of our marriage. In fact, our approach was toxic. It was all about, “Winner takes all.” And that is anything but healthy. We yelled, screamed and acted childishly. And we are not proud Read More…
Celebrating the Christmas season can be hard on relationships —particularly marriage. This may seem like a strange statement, but it’s true. You would think the opposite would be true. After-all, during the Christmas season you’re supposed to be celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ —”the Prince of Peace.” So your goal should Read More…
