Are you having difficulty finding the time and opportunity to keep your romance alive? Are the kids continually under foot when you actually could find a few minutes here and there for romance? You may consider finding ways so you are occupying kids when you want time for romance.
“The world needs to see more couples who have strong marriages. …When sparks are flying, no one has to say a word. Everyone can tell when someone is in love. Wouldn’t you love to be the poster couple for the real thing? …Become the role model for all that is right and good in love and marriage.” (Bill and Pam Farrel)
Occupying Kids Can be Tricky, But it is Doable.
Do something today to step up (or lay down) and make red-hot monogamy a priority. Here are some ways to get the kids to cooperate so you can get in some time for romance:
1. Toss all your change into the greenery in the backyard and tell them they can keep any coins they can find.
2. Do an Easter egg hunt all year round. Hide a designated number of eggs (plastic work well with toys, candy, or coins inside). Tell your children that no one can come inside the house until all the eggs are found (take one egg out so they can’t find the last one). When you are finished, bring the last egg out and ask, “Were you looking for this one?”
3. For Toddlers: Get a favorite video going (be sure to check the time —you might have 30 minutes or two hours!). For older kids: Rent or buy a new video. Use a realistic line like, “Mom and Dad are taking some grown-up time” “Mom and Dad are going to take a nap.” Or our favorite: “We are going to clean our room and can’t be interrupted.” (After sex, you’d better hurry and pick up your room!) For teens: Give them movie tickets so the house is yours for a night.
4. Trade time off with your friends so that each of you has a few hours a week alone. Or, since we are pastors, we can get away with recommending this: Send the kids to a youth group or Sunday school activity, have sex, and then meet them at church later. (We’ll just call this worshiping at Bedside Baptist.) If this tip is used occasionally, your pastor won’t mind because you will have a strong marriage and family and that makes for a strong church.
5. Hire a neighborhood sitter and ask her to take the kids to her home to watch the kids for a few hours.
6. When the movie is playing in the living room, tell the kids you are going to do something in the garage. Enjoy time together in the backseat of your car. Or hide in a closet and kiss until one of the kids finally finds you.
7. Recruit Grandma to take the kids for ice cream or to McDonald’s —or for an extra treat, ask her to take them to the zoo all day.
8. Enroll the kids in preschool and arrange for you and your spouse to go in late to work once a week.
9. Take a long lunch once a week on a school day. Block off from noon till two or three. Write in the calendar: Appointment, R.H.M. (Your secretary won’t know it stands for red-hot monogamy.)
10. Take advantage of those precious hours kids sleep. The dishes can wait. When Junior nods off, head to the bedroom first, and then go back to responsibilities. Or wake each other up in the early morning for sex, or in the middle of the night just start fondling your spouse, and he or she will most likely wake up. You’ll get less sleep, but at least you’ll be smiling the next day anyway.
This article comes from the book, Red-Hot Monogamy: Making Your Marriage Sizzle. It is written by Bill and Pam Farrel, and is published by Harvest House Publishers. In this book, Bill and Pam Farrel give you practical, personal tips for creating the kind of sex life that really works. Whether you and your spouse are newlyweds, a mature couple still young at heart, or somewhere in between —this book offers hundreds of ideas to fan the flame of love. It also gives you an understanding of your spouse that will inspire romance and passion to fuel every aspect of your lives.
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If you need another idea that might work better for you, Thehappywivesclub.com web site gives a great tip that works well for many couples with young children:
If you have additional tips you can share, please “Join the Discussion” by adding your comments below.
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