In the previous Marriage Insight we gave you a list of things you can do to increase the romance in your marriage. So how many did you try? If you said there weren’t any on that list that appealed to you, here are even more romantic things you can try.
This first batch of ideas come from Doug Fields book, Creative Romance (which unfortunately, is no longer in print). Here are some of Doug’s suggestions:
More Romantic Things To Do:
– Read poetry to one another.
– Build sand castles on the beach.
– Make your spouse a greeting card. [Even a primitive one is appreciated—as long as you made it.]
– Swing together on a playground.
– Plant a tree together in honor of your marriage.
– Make heart-shaped pancakes and serve them to your wife [or husband] in bed.
– Surprise your wife when she’s busy by saying, “What can I do to help?”
– Walk through a housing construction site and kiss each other in each house.
– Prior to a “work day” at home, hide gifts for your spouse in places they’ll find them.
– Bring a late-night snack and drink to bed.
Additional Romantic Ideas:
– Have a candlelight picnic in the backyard.
– Leave encouraging notes for your spouse that he (she) will find through the week.
– Go out and play in the mud together and then shower together.
– Write out 50 reasons you’re glad to be married to your spouse. [It can even be 20. But make sure you share them with your spouse.]
– Tuck your wife into bed, read a scripture and kiss her on the forehead.
– Remember how you used to laugh at things he (she) thought was funny? Do it again.
Plus, Here are Even More Ideas:
– Sit on his lap even when there’s sitting room elsewhere.
– Surprise your spouse with an ice-cold beverage while he/she is working hard.
– Create a trail through your home with a string leading your mate to a gift for them.
– Leave teasing notes around the house to create an atmosphere of anticipation.
– Use a tender-touch as you pass one another around the house.
– Using plastic cups, create your own miniature golf course by placing the cups in different locations around the house. Then have fun creatively playing the game together.
And Then There Are More:
– Hug for an extended period of time.
– Do something together to help someone else.
– Fall asleep holding each other. [We especially love this one.]
– Drop everything and do something for the one you love—right now!
Also: Be Flirty With Your Spouse.
Why is it that we flirt with each other a lot before we marry; but sometime later after marrying, we stop? That should not be so! We have God’s permission to flirt with each other. Just read the Song of Solomon and you’ll see a whole lot of flirting going on. Here are a few great flirty tips from Debi Walter from The Romantic Vineyard:
“It’s perfectly permissible to flirt regularly with the one who loves you ’til death do us part.’ If you have never practiced this before you may feel awkward or even shy about it; but don’t let this stop you. Here are some quick ideas to help you practice:
– Come up with a secret code to communicate across the room your intentions for later.
– Have a private pet name for each other; and keep it that way.
– Send your spouse a steamy e-mail.
– French kiss your spouse when they least expect it.
– Whisper sweet something’s in their ear during a meeting.
– Kiss them all over while they’re on the phone. [Hopefully, they can still pay attention.]
– Mouth the words ‘I love you’ without speaking.
– Use your senses. Click here for lots of ways to flirt his senses. (These ideas can be used for either wife to husband or vice versa.)
“May we encourage you to start flirting with your husband/wife today? It is the best and most effective way to keep those embers of romance burning in your hearts for one another, not to mention its great fun!” (From The Romantic Vineyard article, “Stirring The Embers”)
Even More Romantic Things You Can Do Together
Additionally, here are a few more romantic things Debi Walter gives that you can use:
– Have a backyard picnic under the stars. After you have put the kids to bed, move outdoors by candlelight, soft music and your favorite beverage with dessert.
– Put together an indoor Putt-Putt course and enjoy playing together. This takes a bit of planning, but could be so much fun. Make it even more so by incorporating some of our Romantic Putt-Putt Rules to your course.
– Hide and go seek each other. This one is the Mall Version, but you can alter it to fit your home/yard/neighborhood.
– Make your own pizza. Have fun in the kitchen making pizza. Try kneading the dough together—very sensual.
But we’re not done! We want to make sure you have a wealth of romantic ideas to glean through and USE what you can! So here are a number of additional of them from different people:
More and More Romantic Things to Do
– “Spontaneity is something that often happens when we are dating. It is fun to go on unexpected adventures with your partner and learn about them in new and exciting ways. However, just because you feel comfortable enough with someone to marry them, it does not mean you need to settle down into the same routine until ‘death do you part.’ Acting on impulse has its place in a marriage too.” (Whitney White)
So look for things you can do on impulse. But then, don’t forget that doing planned activities together are fun too, such as:
– “Go out to Take Photos. Photography is so accessible nowadays. Whether you’re using your smartphone or a professional camera, choose a beautiful area of your town and take pictures together or take turns modeling for one another with some portrait photography.” (Rachel Pace)
– “Watch the Sunset and Sunrise in One Day. Watching a beautiful sunrise or sunset cuddled up with your partner is the epitome of romance. Why not make it a goal to do both in one day? Though there’s some stunning sunsets around the world, there’s no need to travel far, you can take advantage of what’s in your own backyard too.” (Annette White)
Here are 3 date ideas from Foryourmarriage.org:
– “During the dark of winter, make some light together. Build a fire in the fireplace. Don’t have a fireplace? Light a whole bunch of candles in a grouping. Lay out a blanket and have an indoor picnic. Or at least share some popcorn.”
– “Ride a city bus for the whole route. Reflect on the sights you see and the lives of the people who are your fellow passengers. Debrief your insights afterwards [or during].”
– “Find an empty, open church. Sit, kneel, explore, pray. Let peace and reverence seep into your being. Quietly pray for each other. If you like, discuss your deepest spiritual beliefs afterwards.” (From the article, “Date Ideas for Married Couples”)
And then, here are a few ideas from Barrie Davenport (from his article, 159 Romantic Things to Do):
– “Go to a new coffee shop. Discover a new, funky coffee shop instead of going to your usual chain coffee shop. Find a quaint, locally owned shop to support a local business and cozy up in a corner with your [marriage] partner to enjoy a cup of coffee.”
– “Host a game night. Have a few other couples over and enjoy having a game night with your closest friends. Having fun together and being able to laugh is always a good way to strengthen a relationship and add some romance to your life.
– “Create a theme night. Pick a theme and plan your whole evening around it. For example, if you want to pick an Italian theme, eat some spaghetti and gelato and then watch a movie like La Dolce Vita. You could also do some other themes, such as 1980’s, Asian, Christmas in July, children’s theme, or anything else you can think of.”
– “Go to a local farmer’s market. Pick up the fresh, local ingredients to make a romantic dinner for two.” [Note: Steve and I LOVE going to our Farmer’s Market together. We pick up a few large organic Portobello mushrooms, large heirloom tomatoes, fresh baked Rye bread, Arugula. And take we take them home and grill up two delicious sandwiches (with a few other yummy things on the side). It’s one of our favorite meals!]
Also, from Barrie:
– “Order in favorite food as a surprise stay-at-home ‘dinner date.’ For those days when neither one of you feels like cooking or when you just want something different (that you’ve yet to attempt making yourself), order something in that you both enjoy, and stage an impromptu dinner date.”
– “Pick a book and take turns reading to each other. You could also take turns choosing the book to read. Today’s might be reading a romance novel, and tomorrow’s could be a nonfiction book on a shared interest. Set aside a block of time and make sure you have beverages handy (reading is thirsty work).”
A Few More Romantic Things to Do:
– “Make a Bucket List. Your bucket list of things you want to do in your lifetime will probably include travel, so there is some crossover with the previous point; but there will also be plenty of other things that you want to do aside from travel. This can be a great activity to set some goals of things that you want to do.” (Marc Andre)
– “Create a Spa Night. A spa night or couples massage is a worthwhile indulgence; but it’s also an expensive one. When you’re short on funds and still want that relaxing spa feel, try creating one at home. You can be as ambitious as you want with this. Some ideas include facials, manicures, pedicures, massages, and a special bath with bubble bath, rose petals, or bath bombs. Make your spa night extra special with spa food. Here’s a few suggestions: strawberries, chocolates, and cucumber or fruit-infused water. Light some candles, lay out fresh towels, and play some relaxing spa music. Then take turns giving each other spa services…” (Sarah Graves)
And, if you want even more ideas, please visit our ROMANTIC IDEAS topic. Can you tell that we’re committed to help you grow your love story? … Yes, we are!
Have fun as you improve the romance in your marriage!
Steve and Cindy Wright
— ADDITIONALLY —
To help you further, we give a lot of personal stories, humor, and more practical tips in our book, 7 ESSENTIALS to Grow Your Marriage. We hope you will pick up a copy for yourself. (It’s available both electronically and in print form.) Plus, it can make a great gift for someone else. It gives you the opportunity to help them grow their marriage. And who doesn’t need that? Just click on the linked title or the picture below:
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